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providentielle

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Everything posted by providentielle

  1. providentielle
    Please don't worry or blame yourself. I work with children and cared for a little boy with speech and language difficulties for three years and have recently worked alongside and language therapist for 3 months. If you haven't noticed a problem then it is probably not too bad, however if she does need speech therapy its not the end of the world, lots of children have it. There are things you can do at home to help. First, she is likely to cooperate with you if you try to check her hearing. You can do this by getting objects that sound similar such as a cup and a cap or a doll and a ball. you then cover your mouth so she cant read your lips and quietly ask her to give you one of the objects, this will help you to find out how well she can hear. When she is talking if she makes any mistakes dont say "its not .... its ....." you just reinforce what she says but say it back in the prooper way eg if she says i falled over you "really? you fell over? are you ok?" it shows her the right way to say it without pointing out it was wrong. Also ask lots of open ended questions. That means instead of saying do you want a cheese sandwhich for lunch? Ask what do you want for lunch? This stops her just saying yes or no and helps her use language more. I hope this helps
  2. providentielle
    The average is 3 to 7 days
  3. providentielle
    Everyone is here for you during the next two weeks, i know how hard it will be but i'm sure you can do it! Good luck
  4. providentielle
    I really dont think there is anyhting u can do right now to make her realise what she has done. You just have to believe that what goes around comes around and that one day she will know that she has made mistakes and that it is too late to fix them. In the meantime you need to take comfort in the fact that you are the better person and just get on with your life and make sure you are a better person from your experiences and refuse to let her have a negative impact on your life any more than she already has. Good luck
  5. providentielle
    This is your BEST FRIEND! There is no question. Who is the supportive one who you are going to have in your life forever? It sounds like this relationship is not making you happy and that this guy is treating you badly. Realistically, which relationship is going to stand the test of time? Close friends can usually have a better perspective on our partners cause they are not so emotionally involved and they have our best interests in mind so would not do anything to hurt us and would not dislike this guy for no reason. I think you already know your decision, deep down. Make sure it is the right one, Good luck
  6. providentielle
    i think being bored is a very overused answer. There could be more to it than that but you will need to talk to her more to figure it out. But if you like her instead of guessing and waiting for her to say or do something why not just tell her how you feel and ask her out?
  7. providentielle
    I know how it feels to want someone so much that you will accept any scraps they will throw you and hope against all hope that it will be what changes things and then you can be together. As much as it sucks to admit it now he is not worth your time and you need to move on. I think it's time to try no contact and get out there with friends and family who really care about you and can make you feel good about yourself again and eventually you can find someone who will be all you could have hoped for. Good luck
  8. providentielle
    Good luck and let us know how it goes.
  9. providentielle
    I think that sounds like a good idea, people dont just stop caring about each other. It has to be your decision in the end but I really hope you talk to her, I know how I felt in a very similar situation and it an explanation, sooner than i got one, would have meant so much and could have saved our friendship before it was too late
  10. providentielle
    I really think that she is feeding off the way you are reacting to her. If she has confided in you and you had a close relationship then it is not easy to just give something like that up. You dont need to ask her if something is wrong, just say, look, sorry i've been an idiot, it's just because...... (fill the blanks) i miss you, do you think we can be friends again?
  11. providentielle
    Please do not follow heloladies advice, that is a way to ensure she wont go out with you and lose her as a friend! She knows how you feel and now she is single so just give her time, if she wants to take things further you will know about it. There is a little thing you could try though. If you are sitting accross a table from her then spend a few minutes playing with something, like holding the salt shaker and "fidgeting" with it. Then sit it down close to her. If she picks it up then that is a very good sign, if she leaves it where it is then she is accepting of you at the very least and if she pushes it away then she doesnt feel for you in the way you want her to. Good luck
  12. providentielle
    I can understand how you feel about this. I had a fantastic relationship with a male friend which has changed so much because feelings got involved and I feel so frustrated with myself at times about how I dealt with it. I have to say that knowing you made a mistake is the best thing to come out of this, you will learn from it and it will make you a better person in the long run. I know that doesn't make what you are feeling any easier now, but in time it might. The worst thing about this is that you hurt someone you care about. You said she hardly talk to you, but that means she does still talk to you. Have you explained to her why you stopped talking to her? She may not understand why and think that your feelings changed or she got to much for you or any number of reasons! I think that if you justswallowed your pride and told her you were stupid and why that it would make the whole situation better. At the very least she wont think she has done something to make you behave the way you did and it may even get your friendship back on track. I say all this from experience, please think about it. Good luck
  13. providentielle
    I think that if he really loved you then he would have not broken up with you becuase of something as superficial as your weight. I agree that he was a coward in the way he broke up with you and in time things like this will make you realise that you deserve so much better than him. Seeing him again will be hard but it has to be done and it will be the first stage in the healing process. There is no magic cure to how you are feeling but I promise that in time it will get easier. Try to keep busy, it makes time pass quicker and you will learn to love yourself again by spending time with people who really care about you. I know that right now you feel as if your world has ended and you will never be happy again, that you cant eat or sleep and that you physically feel the pain of losing him and all you can do is keep reminding yourself that in the long run this is making you a better person and that it wont always be like this. One day you will be able to look back and see that this relationship taught you so much and you will be able to use those lessons in a new relationship. I know its hard and nothing and no one can make it easier but remember that you are not alone and that it does get better. Good luck
  14. providentielle
    After only three weeks of nc and six weeks since the end of a 5 year relationship i dont know anyone who would be ok enough to not still have issues regarding the relationship. Also, it seems from the way you talk about her new relationship you do care and you are not ok with it. I think a little more time and space would definitely help. Good luck
  15. providentielle
    Dreams can unsettle us and be very powerful but they are not real, death in dreams represents a change, a new start, moving on, so this is nothing to be concerned about. It is also natural to dream about things you think about during the day and tells you what you already know, that you care about her and, possibly, that you are scared of losing her. I would presume she remembers you either becuase she has a good memory or you made a good impression on her. Either way it's not a bad thing so just be pleased she did remember you and dont worry too much about why. You can always ask her at some point if the opportunity arises.
  16. providentielle
    He knows how you feel and has had plenty of opportunity to tell you if he wanted a relationship with you. It's harsh, i'm sorry, but you need to tell him to find somewhere else to live and start trying to move on. Good luck
  17. providentielle
    I agree with in_the_mirror, You should let her know you like her, that is enough for starters. Ask to have a chat with her and be brave. Good luck
  18. providentielle
    Women get just as confused about guys as guys do about women!
  19. providentielle
    If there is no future and your are not happy with things in the present then maybe you shouldn't be pursuing this relationship? Just because you perform oral sex on her does not mean she has to do it to you. Saying thankyou might not be what she wants to hear but it is better than lying to her. If you do want to continue the relationship you need to talk to her again and if she says she loves you try telling her that you care about her too. You could even add that you have concerns though and that may lead her to telling you how she is feeling about things.
  20. providentielle
    DO NOT TELL HER YOU LOVE HER IF YOU DONT On the other stuff, talk to her. Some women just do not like giving guys oral sex. There could be a reason behind her change in behaviour, if she says she loves you then I doubt it's because she doesn't like you so why not give her the opportunity to tell you what is going on? Don't pressure her to do stuff though, it will make the situation worse, talk through what is going on and take it from there.
  21. providentielle
    Engagement doesn't have to mean getting married yet, a long engagement would be sensible. I agree with fmfisdead on the support thing though. Men are solution orientated and when a gf tells them a problem they try to fix it for her, whereas she just wants to be comforted. That is not my opinion, it has been shown in research. Its a minefield! But you need to talk to each other, you are not psycic so the only way you can know what each other wants is to talk about it!
  22. providentielle
    Cant she move in with you? That way you could live together but you dont need to move and could continue paying cheap rent and also it would help her save money and maybe she could give up one of her jobs which would help her grades. When you say that you are comfortable and dnt want t change are you talking about your apartment or your life in general? After a long relationship at such a young age it is hard to imagine your life without her in it, are you sure you want to save the relationship? You seem to want her to accept how you are and for her to be the one to make changes to accommodate you? Being afraid of commitment can be too easy a card for people to play sometimes, exactly what are you afraid of? A five year relationship at your age is already a commitment and I can understand why she may want more. To ensure your relationship survives your law degree and to show her than your relationship is not stuck in a rut but has a future. I really think you need to look at what you want and how you really feel about her before you can talk to her to try and work things out. Good luck
  23. providentielle
    I definitely think that a person can love someone even if that person does not love them back. I am tempted to say that love is more of an emotional experience than a crush but that is probably overgeneralising....
  24. providentielle
    I remember reading somewhere that you only need to see a doctor if you haven't had a period by the time you are 17 and a half. Dont worry, it will happen and then you'll wish it didn't! lol
  25. providentielle
    From your conversation last night it doesn't seem like he has explained to you what hapened before or is he willing to talk to you about it. He has treated you badly but doesnt seem very remorseful? Only you can decide if he deserves a last chance, but i think you need to have a proper talk before then. I Do think that people shouldnt leave themselves in a situation where they end up wondering what if, and i do believe it is better to regret things you have done than things you haven't. Basically, has he had is chance or are you prepared to risk the hurt again to give him another chance and see if the relationship can be what you want it to be. Good luck
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