so darn tired to failing

[Mjane]

I just need to vent. I have just given up on a guy that I thought was super promising. But after two months of barely hearing and seeing him. I reached out for the last time this week and he has yet to respond.

I am so tired of failing at love. I'm not even that picky. You just gotta be male, smart, funny and caring.

Is that too much to ask?

I am just so frustrated and sad and fed up!!!

Why does it never seem to work for me?

Maybe I should stop picking smart guys, although I thrive on mental challenge. What's the key? I've read tons of books about what to do, but nothing seems to work for me.

I'm just so down. I don't know what to do anymore.

[Emotional]

It may not take over night to get over this foolish foolish Loser escuse for a man. Maybe this guy was just not right for u, dont worry there will be plenty more where that came from.

 

I hate when relationships don't work out, myself. Hun I feel for u, but you can't keep stressing over it. Is there anything you like to do that can maybe keep your mind of him. Someone who can really help u through this. Like a family member, bestfriend?

 

Anything thing to keep ur mind of of him. Do u like exersizing? maybe you can go to the gym and release ur stress in a positive way. Exersizing may not be your thing. Maybe it's joining some kind of organization club. Like being a Big Sister!...I wish you good luck hun.

 

I feel ur frustration. God has a special someone for u. Don't lose hope.

[apollocreed71]

From my experience, I always seem to meet women who have guy problems. It is usually the type of guy they choose, believe me the handsome smart guy that all the women are attracted to are the worst. Why should they give up the multitudes for one woman. Its just a man thing. Go for someone who is interested in you, look on the inside and not so much the outside on intelligence.

Good luck. you can always pm me.

[Mjane]

Thanks for your support.

I've been feeling like this for a while, probably because this relationship was going nowhere. But I also haven't been too successful replacing this guy.

[Mjane]

Hey Apollo,

I don't go for looks. I am always going for what's on the inside. But these guys.... I don't know what the deal is. Are the smart guys so emotionally stunted they don't know how to have a relationship?

Is it my age group? Are all men in their 30s totally messed up?

Dumb guys bore me. I don't go for players. I go for guys who can hold a conversation.

Although, I do have to be attracted to the guy.

[gogol]

were you two seeing one another online?

[Emotional]

you feel like you have to have another guy in a snap of your fingers. I understand, but maybe focusing more on what you need and less on what you want. You need self confidence and some happiness shine in on your life. Maybe it's not your time to have a boyfriend. They always seem to bring you up and then just right back down. To tell u the truth. Im sick of men as well.

 

You mention you want a new one, but is that really what you need? that special someone will come when you are ready. Right now a little self work may do you tons of good.

 

good luck sweets.

 

Pm me anytime

[Hope75]

Hi MJane,

 

It always seems to be the way doesn't it? I seem to have bad luck when it comes to guys too. My cat has been the most loyal guy in my life for the last 10 years LOL!!

 

Try not to lose heart, you know if you kiss enough frogs you will someday find your prince.

 

Have you considered online dating websites? They create a much larger dating pool and allow you to get to know a little about a guy before you have to meet him.

 

I've done it, and met my bf there (we've had our share of problems and he isn't perfect, but a good guy none the less) and I saw alot of seemingly decent guys on there looking for dates.

 

It's 2005, it's not so taboo anymore.

 

Just a thought!

[Mjane]

gogo,

we had dates face to face.

[Mjane]

Hope,

I've done tons of online dating. Actually met P from an online web site.

If i'm attracting or attracted to the wrong guys... the only thing they have in common is I really do go for smarts, professionalism, education. Maybe I need to date a factory worker. Actually this factory worker did ask me out, but I was convinced he was gay so I never contacted him. I figure he just wanted a cover because he was from an Italian family.

[DN]

It may not take over night to get over this foolish foolish Loser escuse for a man. Maybe this guy was just not right for u, dont worry there will be plenty more where that came from.

 

quote]

A little extreme. Just because a guy isn't into someone and doesn't do what she wants doesn't make him a loser or foolish. Attitudes like that won't help anyone get what they want.

 

The attitude about professionalism, education etc. may be somewhat restrictive. Being smart isn't just about education and professionalism. If you widen your choices it may be a smart decision. Factory workers can be smart as well. They can also be warm, funny, loving and decent human beings.

[Emotional]

well...I have one thing to say about that...

 

If he was really a "MAN" then he would of stuck by her side...

[mgirl]

Sweety,

 

I feel the same way. I've been looking and looking, with my heart i mean, and still... nothing.

 

People say, "approach somebody if you like them", and i do, but it gets me nowhere. I like somebody at the moment but they are 'with' somebody else and it pains me to see them together. I also think it's really rude as i am sure this girl knows i like her but i don't think she cares.

 

Oh well. Back to the drawing board

[Mjane]

Just when I'd about given up he calls. But I was out and I returned the call but have not heard back.

Sigh.

A factory worker did ask me out... or at least he has my phone number.. we'll see if he calls.. I will go out with him to broaden my horizons.

I met a couple on an airplane sunday who told me I should emanate a more positive glow. Are guys really attracted to that? I try and be funny, witty and a bit sweet. Should I just be sweet and forget about the rest?

Ok that's a bit extreme.

[DN]

Funny and witty is good - so long as it is not sarcastic or hurtful. One of the best ways to attract someone is to smile, listen to what they have to say and look into their eyes - and smile!

[Mjane]

I even have straight teeth.

I am a bit sarcastic... who isn't? But I don't put people down or say hurtful things. In fact I make people laugh.

I will get beyond this. I have to.

[mgirl]

Hi Mjane,

 

It's just 'one of those things'. Meeting somebody is just 'luck'. Seriously, there is nothing 'seriously' wrong with me, but the 'one' just alludes me.

 

Don't despair... One day, when you least expect it, you will meet Mr. Right.

 

Believe me

[Mjane]

mgirl,

I appreciate your responses. I actually don't believe in fate. I think you make your own happiness and you make success. Finding the right person is all about timing. I've realized this. I was just having a very weak time last week. I'm much calmer now.

I have a complicated situation. I started dating someone three months ago, but we have hardly seen each other the past two months... sounds weird I know. But he's going through extreme stress. I've been through something similar so I know how little time you can have for a relationship when you are struggling to find a job.

I just get down on occasion when long periods stretch between hearing from him. And while I'm dating other guys as well, I haven't found any one to replace P. I knew he was special when I met him. And the more guys I date, the more that fact is reinforced. That makes me sad but also reassures me that my instincts about him were right.

I will have to give up on him eventually if he doesn't come around. I just pray he gets a job soon and we can put this behind us. Doesn't that just go to show it's all timing?