Im finding it hard to move on...

[Brokenheartedm]

hello all, by now you all are probably sick of seeing my name on here, but it gives me kind of sanity just to talk and not reach to my ex.

Its been 5 months and I am still not fully moved on=(. I contacted her for a few weeks and tried one last time the next month and have been nc for 3 months now. I am finding it hard to move on the first month I was a new person, hanging with girls, dating but nothing that knocked my socks off, my ex and I almost got back but mutuals and her coworkers took over her mind and made sure she didn't come back. (shed be the stupid girl to come back ). I don't exactly remember who did the breaking up but we were both tired and needed a break and I was frustrated and said good idc lets break up, it crushed her and she cried on way home. we hung out the whole week after sex and everything else. I was doing fine, moving on sorta kinda, but here I am on the 5th month the wound reopened and it feels like the day after our break up all over again, and all I do is think about her, and how no girl I meet compares, I never ever liked a girl as much as I liked her and I sat and thought about it. Id take our crazy rollercoaster of a relationship anyday over starting with some one new, as I said we were very jealous of each other she was afraid to lose me and I thought she was gunan leave me idk why, cause we were with each other everyday . Its now even harder cause I still see her cause she joined my department after the breakup ( which she probably did purposely so I don't move on). I probably would have been well moved on if I didn't see her at all, but seeing someone that you shared so many memories with, talked about marriage and kids, and now act as if you never knew each other well let me tell ya that just hurts. Mine as well take a knife and stab me in the heart and throw it on the ground infront of me and stomp on it cause that how it feels x10. I love this girl still and besides from her joining the department she has not tried to contact me (it hurts) she still talks about me but idk if its cause she is still angry and hurt and misses, we never got closure and people got involved and tore us apart even further. I don't know how to move on seeing the love of my life constantly, and being reminded constantly of what we had

[Krankor]

1. Keep talking to/dating other women. You may meet one that gets your mind off the ex.

 

2. Keep yourself busy. Work out, buy some new clothes and update your look, go out with friends, develop new hobbies, etc.

 

3. Avoid your ex at work as best as you can. When you do have to deal with her be professional and cordial and that's it.

 

Those things will help; they aren't cures, (well, finding someone else you are really into can be) but they help take the edge off the symptoms. I know this is hard, but know that this will get better in time. I work with a woman who dumped me and broke my heart about a year ago. She no longer has any effect on me; it took a while, but I got there. You will too.

[EvanT]

Hi man, this ain't no advise but I want you to know that my first gf broke up with me about 6 months ago, I remember thinking to myself back then; "in a half a year, ill be recovered, and I wont even be thinking about her again" biggest lie ever, here I am, half a year later, still crying because we arent together anymore, she is in a new relationship for like 3 months now and she probably did get all over me and stop thinking about me, and here I am, still struggling, luckily my friends support me till this day and help me through things when Im having a though time, I want you to know that it's okay if you are still struggling with it, because I am aswell, love is a powerfull thing and can break a man, but once we find our magnicifent other, our ex's will be nothing to us, and that is what keeps me going

[johnnydanger]

I feel your pain buddy. When I read your post, I was thinking that maybe my ex gf is in the same frame of mind as you are, about me.

 

I can relate to what you said about taking your Rollercoaster of a relationship back instead of starting a new one. A new beginning with someone else is nice and definitely a real option, but it is hard to meet someone who is truly compatible. When you consider the amount of energy and time it takes to court a new lady, wine and dine, get to know all the nuances, it can be a little off putting. Sure you can meet any bimbo and start a relationship, and yes it will help you get over the ex. But you might not wind up with the best quality mate.

 

Anyway, if you really want her back then I hope it somehow works out for you.