How to get back my girlfriend?

[yip1010]

I was dating my girlfriend for about one and half year. It didn't seem long but was long for me compare to my other relationships. We were very sweet at the beginning but things started tearing out ever since I work two jobs. She left me because I didn't treat her the way she wanted it, careless, self center, selfish, didn't put her on the priority, didn't pay attention to her and didn't spend enough quality time with her. We have been trying to breaking up more than 5 times just in a year with the same complains. She always gave me the chance a couple days later. She said I didn't change at all. I think I did. Anyway, this time, she is very serious because she is getting tired of my careless attitute. I didn't spend enough time with her because I was having two jobs try to make the living and plan for our future, but she didn't buy that. The complain was I did not try hard enough to build the foundation.

 

I really love her and miss her. I think she was the one for me. She used to think the same way. But now she is gone... She said she had met someone but I don't believe in her. I really want to get her back to my arm, what should I do? Please give me some advice... Thanks in advance

[SnowBunnee]

Ok first thing first You can not make someone be with you if they say they are done. Its a harsh reality that we all have to realize. Think about this, if you guys were trying to break up 5 times in a year and you were only together for a year....That says that you guys are not going to just wish your problems away. You can love someone but not be able to get along with them.

You have to want to work things out to make it work, it sounds like she is done and does not want to work it out with you. leave her alone for awhile and see if she comes back to you. A broken heart hurts, just give it some time to heal.

 

"If you love something let it go, if it comes back to you its yours if it doesn't then it never was"

[mataney]

rule #1. don't contact her. the secret is that you need to let her miss you.

if she doesn't contact you in 14 days, then call her. work from there.

 

in this time. think hard about what you want. work on yourself. don't worry, she's having a hard time dealing with this as well. you have to realize that this one of those forks in the road in life. don't lose yourself.

 

good luck

[heloladies21]

I say rule #1: Do No Contact and if she doesn't call you don't contact her ever. If she does call, be nice and be cool as ice. Give her 5 minutes then tell her you have something to do. See if she starts to persue you and then you can decide what you want to do with her.

 

In the mean time, why don't you see what's out there. Might there be a girl who can deal with your work schedule? Probably, and she also might be able to give you other things that you might be missing in your relationship. Just browse around, window shop, flirt and see if someone catches your eye.

[yip1010]

Thanks so much for all your response. I do really love her as this moment. I did think about what would I do in the future if she does come back to me but she is gone. She is with other guy right now. I do not think she loves that guy but for companionship. She told me that all her feeling is gone. She hates me so much when we broke up. I ask her for a chance to start over but she said she couldn't forget the way I treated her last year and half.

 

I try not to call her but I couldn't. I haven't contact her for a few days but

I do want to get her back. I'm afraid that if I let her be with that guy too long, I have 0 chance. I do not want her to fall in love with other guy.

 

What should I do? Just sit back and wait? It's a little hard for me to go out find someone else at this moment but I will try.

 

Thanks again for all your concern

[Lonley26]

Time is your friend. Let her be with that guy and you go on with your life as if she were never going to come back. If she comes back it will be because she realizes that she loves you. If she doesnt come back then she doesnt love you anymore and why would you want her back if she no longer loves you? Just give it time. Only time can tell. In the mean time take care of yourself and make yourself a better person for yourself and whoever you end up with next.

[yip1010]

Thank you Lonley26 for your warm advice. You are right, I need to move on and to be a better person. As right now, I'm not really get used to not having her around. The life is so lonely without having a relationship.

 

I think my only choice is time. I just very piss off that she found someone so quick. She is not that kind of girl. I would expect her to wait for a while but I guess she is totally gave up on me.

 

Anyhow, I still wish she can come back to me so that I can prove to her what I mean change.

 

Time can tell...but I feel a little better from time to time.

[confused by love]

im sorry man that sucks but you never know what the future holds in store for you guys maybe her finding someone else so quickly is her way of finding out if your the one she wants try and give her some space for awile and let her ome to you if that doesnt work i dont know what to say but that its not ment hope everything works out thanks for your help with my prob ttyl

[WArrior458]

Well i understand how you feeling .... There was only one Man in my life i do and will always love whether we are going to get bak together or not

and it has been 3 years now that we have broken up and still love him , we broke up because of certain circumstances and it was better for us to separate and finish doing wat we have to do and we decided if we still love eachother in the future than yea! we'll get bak together..but than again God knows how long that will be and i can't wait for him or vise versa forever iam still dating around don't want to miss my chance, and iam sure he still is too but all i know is that ti'll this day even though i had a couple of relatioships after him, my heart still cries for him....

WEll my point is that i know it hurts as hell!! but like time is the only way u can heal and finish doing wht u are doing fo the future save money and so when u have ur future family or even plann to get married u'll have no stress about it , there is people who are very ambitious in life and their partner got's to understand maybe u need someone who is ambitious too who understands and will support u and not be selfish for their needs let me tell u something "Love is not only bout hugs and kisses it's about sacrafices too " so meanwhile don't stress urself on this because if she loved u she would not get a boyfriend right away all i can see is that she's just being selfish about wanting her needs( not Mature enough)..IT took me at least 8-1year to start a realtionship after the brake up ..now u tell me if i didn't care bout this guy i wiould have just do a rebound..

K well Good Luck and try to think positive!!

PEace

[yip1010]

I has been more than a month since we broke up. I know she is seeing other guy but I do not think they have much going on other than companionship.

 

Our "relationship"/friendship is getting better.

We still talk and email each other back and ford. She always purposely talk to that guy on the phone in front of me when we hang out as friend. She always say what to get back certain time to meet up with him when we hang out. I was so stress out when she did that. She told me if I can't take this, just better off not seeing and talking to each other.

 

She asked me to cheer for her when she had the 10 miles run and I did. After the run, she ditch me to see the other guy. I was so...angry but didn't want to say anything. One other thing, she ask me if I want to join some classes (i.e kickboxing and dancing) with her and I did. Mother's day is coming, I ask her if I can give something for her mom and she didn't reject. She ask me to go to her house and have BBQ with her family. What does she want? When I want to step back and forget about her, something always trying to pull me back to see her. I don't know what is in her mind. She helps me registered the Kickboxing class already. I still love her and have very strong feeling for her. What should I do and what does she want?

 

Ladies, please tell me what a girl think when she does something like this.

 

Ladies/gentlement, any advise or commoment will be highly appriciated.

[red2k2rt]

sounds to me like shes playing games. i would start dating someone else and see how she reacts. cause i honestly believe she doing all this cause she knows you'll jump at any chance to see her.