Controlling relationship red flag signs...

[Daisy78]

I think I am in a controlling relationship. I have been dating a guy for 4 months... after 2 dates he told me he has strong feelings for me and He told he loves me and has never felt this way about anyone. He said he really cares about me and he makes sure I get to and from work OK as I can't drive for health reasons. He is more overweight than me and tells me that I need to put on weight as I weigh about 8st .. I don't know if he is controlling me or if he is concerned for me... I also lent him money to pay an overdue bill which he hasn't paid me back for and I lent him the money because he has taken me away for a few days and paid for nights out and things. He once went out to the mall at midnight to buy me tablets when i had period pain He tells me I'm gorgeous and that he is lucky to have me and that his work colleagues are jealous as they fancy me. I'm on a bit of a dilemma.. I suppose I am on the more reserved and quieter side than him and maybe he being more confident he feels protective of me but I'm confused as I now think he might be trying to control me. I am a bit worried as he knows so many people that if I finish with him I'll be hated.

He helps people in the street, looks after his parents and is very very confident. Any red flag signs I should look out for?

[gebaird]

I think he's legitimately concerned about you. If you feel his protectiveness is crossing a boundary, talk to him about it. Don't be afraid to assert yourself if you need more freedom.

[Wiseman2]

Everything you listed here are red flags. Too much too soon too fast. Most of all that you are asking yourself this. You are in the honeymoon prince charming phase right now.

 

Read up on "controlling relationships": Red flags not to ignore

I think I am in a controlling relationship.

after 2 dates he told me he has strong feelings for me and He told he loves me and has never felt this way about anyone.

tells me that I need to put on weight as I weigh about 8st .

I also lent him money to pay an overdue bill which he hasn't paid me back

I now think he might be trying to control me.

[janut1]

He doesn't sound controlling to me. Maybe more of a love bomber who is moving too fast.

 

I do recommend that you stop loaning him money though. If he takes you out and pays thats his decision. You shouldn't feel like you have to pay him back or loan him money because of that. If he's taking you to work and back chip in for gas thats only fair.

If you don't want him to drive you to work tell him.

 

It seems to me that you are having a hard time with discussing your boundaries.

 

Ask him to slow down if he's moving to fast or if you are already unhappy break up with him.