Digging for Dirt

[reinventmyself]

I

 

He has admitted that I am a great girl and he doesn't want to lose me ... He claims that maybe he wasn't ready for a relationship, he doesn't know if it's because he wants to date other girls, but he just wants to chill and do whatever he wants whenever he wants..

 

If any man gave me a list of justifications like this as to why he wasn't totally invested in the relationship, I'd set him free to figure it out.

No wonder you have doubts.

[Wiseman2]

It would be best to end it if you are looking for a serious relationship

 

Translation: I'm stringing you along until something better rolls around 6745433] He claims that maybe he wasn't ready for a relationship, he doesn't know if it's because he wants to date other girls, but he just wants to chill and do whatever he wants whenever he wants.

[evad1]

He told you that??? I missed that. Why are you guys in a relationship then? Dump him. That's not helping your depression. Why do you stay with him if you know he's like this? I still believe mushy gushy isn't always anything special. Not everyone is like that but at the same time you normally know if someone is into you or not. Also if you're depressed you may want to work on yourself before dating anymore. It's hard on both parties when a partner is depressed. This guy definitely sounds like he's not ready to handle that. You'll meet someone who will one day though.

[Iunderstand]

Here's my two cents worth... what you might not imagine is that you're a really nice girl but for whatever reason you don't love yourself.. and he just buys into it by the meaning you for sleeping too much or this out or the other thing. Perhaps deep down you think you deserve this see you apologizing for finding out he is basically trying to cheat on you if he hasn't cheated already. It's kind of like you think you deserve this and you should apologize for actually finding out. I hope this makes some sense. The first thing I would do is read the power of positive thinking by Norman Vincent Peale and really do what it days. It's got a religious overtime but this is where you need to start. Its helped millions of people over the years. The next thing you do when you feel good about yourself start working out get in shape feel really good about yourself. And then somebody that feels really good about you is going to come along and then you can offload this fool. Don't chase him ... Replace him. Once you start feeling better about yourself looking better working out getting out there with a great attitude you can have a guy or two coming after you it's just going to happen. And you better see how this goes going to toe the line when that starts to happen and being afraid you're going to leave him. And that's when you leave them and trade up for a real man. The point is your looping negative thoughts feeling bad about yourself which had drawn somebody that keeps you down so he can feel confident you're not going anyplace no matter what he does. Read that one little book and do what it says and then go work out like a banshee. Don't say anything about it to him let him wonder what the hell's going on. And as soon as a guy or two shows an interest you can tell them you have a boyfriend but he keeps calling you stupid or whatever and I want to stand up for myself for a change what do you think??? Then you can look for this guy to come save the day and want you for you.. The new you. So go make it happen don't accept less... life is way too short to be miserable when you can be really freakin happy with somebody else. Have the mental discipline to make you the best you can be. You work on you. Everything else will work itself out just like I've described.