Can't let go

[Red3]

A couple months probably, starting and focusing on a new job helped. But it was only a month or so long relationship, it was juat confusing and left me with no closure. Never been dumped like that before after being pursued so hard.

 

We were together two years and I have never been in love with someone like that before which is why I am finding it so difficult to let go I think..

 

I know she loved me in the same way at least she did at some point...I keep thinking she will come around but I'm pretty sure she's already happier without me and it @&@ing sucks

 

I know what I need to do. I know I need to leave her alone. Work on myself for myself and just see what happens but it's been 3 months now already and I still think about her 24/7 in some capacity. Life is brutal.

[Samuel824]

I was let go from my job due to a back issue. I have been in back pain for 7 months now. I have no family and friends here. She is the only financial support and place to live.

 

The only thing that's mine is my car. If I left and took my car, I would have to live in it, and be homeless.

 

I'm so depressed I have no will to even try. I'm pretty much stuck here with no option of getting out. We have 3 children that I take care of everyday, all by myself. She used to be a great mom and love her kids. Now she tells all 4 of us she hates us everyday. Yeah, she says it too the kids too.

[Red3]

I was let go from my job due to a back issue. I have been in back pain for 7 months now. I have no family and friends here. She is the only financial support and place to live.

 

The only thing that's mine is my car. If I left and took my car, I would have to live in it, and be homeless.

 

I'm so depressed I have no will to even try. I'm pretty much stuck here with no option of getting out. We have 3 children that I take care of everyday, all by myself. She used to be a great mom and love her kids. Now she tells all 4 of us she hates us everyday. Yeah, she says it too the kids too.

 

Dude...this is terrible...if you have no option to move out can't she go live somewhere else??? Jesus. She is disrespecting you so much

[No1]

Red....Its over.. time to accept it and move forward and Ill tell you why.

There is a reason why she didnt want to be with you. Or could be many reasons why she didnt want to be with you. None of those reasons matter. Not a single one. It takes two to make a relationship work and you can enough love for two people, but if the other one doesnt have their heart set in it, then its not going to work.

 

You are also in love with a fantasy. You mentioned she was your first and that is something that you will always have but Ill be honest. Your first doesnt mean its your best.

 

Here is why you move on.... If you do nothing to improve on yourself, if you do nothing to move forward with your own life then what incentive have you given your X to come back? Lets say a girl breaks up with a guy because he still lives at home and she wants more from this guy. So this guy puts his life on hold and does nothing to move out of his parents house because he feels she will come back. Then what incentive is there for the girl to return? There is none. If she comes back she will go right back into the same situation she was unhappy with.

 

But if the guy moves on with his life, gets a better job, gets enough money to move out and now he is on his own and doing things to make himself happy then he has given the X and any other girl incentive to look your way.. do you follow me?

 

The relationship is over.. quit looking back because she is not there. Do what you have to do to make yourself happy again.

[Red3]

Red....Its over.. time to accept it and move forward and Ill tell you why.

There is a reason why she didnt want to be with you. Or could be many reasons why she didnt want to be with you. None of those reasons matter. Not a single one. It takes two to make a relationship work and you can enough love for two people, but if the other one doesnt have their heart set in it, then its not going to work.

 

You are also in love with a fantasy. You mentioned she was your first and that is something that you will always have but Ill be honest. Your first doesnt mean its your best.

 

Here is why you move on.... If you do nothing to improve on yourself, if you do nothing to move forward with your own life then what incentive have you given your X to come back? Lets say a girl breaks up with a guy because he still lives at home and she wants more from this guy. So this guy puts his life on hold and does nothing to move out of his parents house because he feels she will come back. Then what incentive is there for the girl to return? There is none. If she comes back she will go right back into the same situation she was unhappy with.

 

But if the guy moves on with his life, gets a better job, gets enough money to move out and now he is on his own and doing things to make himself happy then he has given the X and any other girl incentive to look your way.. do you follow me?

 

The relationship is over.. quit looking back because she is not there. Do what you have to do to make yourself happy again.

 

You are 100% right. That is exactly what I plan to do and I already feel like I've learned a lot from this and am moving in the right direction I've just been finding it hard to let go. Some days are easier than others. The replies on here have been really helpful. I know my only chance of rekindling something with her or to be able to create a lasting relationship with somone else (if I find someone else I like as much) will be to move forward and improve myself and my own life.

 

I will not let this break me

[Ryan1997]

Same position man together two years everything was great and happy until she started her last year of high school this boy moves therw ( he is my complete opposite im 5,7 stocky, brown hair and eyes and i wear t shirts jeans and boots, he is a hipster wears skinny jeans loafers is tall and skinny with blond hair and gigantic glasses he has every class with her and they are on the academic team together ) everything turned sour after that she grew more distant was talking to me less and less seemes less interested and no longer acted like a girlfriend i finally demanded to know what was wrong this "friend" ended up telling her he liked her and she thought she liked him we decided to take a break to figure out what she wanted she ended up kissing him the next day dating at the end of the week and told me she gave him a blowjob on the first date its rough man they make all these promises to you and you trust them completely and they betray you by monkey branching to someone else your gonna miss her and your gonna feel like taking her back but theres one thing you have to realize if she came back to you right now things would not work out she betrayed your trust, lied to you , emotionally cheated on you, and is probably out giving. blowjobs and lord knows what else like mine i still love the person she used to be but she is gone the girls we loved would mever do somthing like that those versions of them are gone once you realize if she does come back things will mever work out it will help you it did me i still love and miss her but unless they have alot of time to change and grow up its worthless to pine after them .