Trying to Come Back? Or For Attention?

[m7592]

So this girl and I start talking just 2-3 weeks after the got out of a 2.5 year relationship. They were engaged, he cheated 3 months before the wedding for the second time. They also have a 13 month old together. This girl is young, only 19. Obviously rebound written all over it. We get along amazingly, great connection, great sex, everything felt right, she was obsessed, would face time me and call me and we'd be on the phone for 1-3 hours before bed. I've never gotten along better with any girl in my life.

 

Her ex finds out about me. Gets jealous and starts contacting her again. We had big plans that her and I were so excited for all week and last minute calls and cancels. Says she just got off the phone with her ex and he can't watch the kid. Just like a switch, so suddenly, she gets cold and distant and is acting very different. Few days later tells me her and I moved way too fast, which we did move very fast, and that she scared to get into another relationship, she's not ready for it yet, and that she promised herself to not be with anyone for a while after the break up but then met me and didn't expect to actually really like me. 99% sure her ex contacted her brought back a whole bunch of feelings and she just realized all of this between her and I is too soon and she's not ready to move on from her ex, which I understand

 

We talk for another week. She's still weird, gets irritated very easily, told me she hates her life and her mood swings have been awful. One day she's cool and normal, the next she's completely different. She seemed like a mess. We stop talking. 2 weeks later snapchats me one weekend and we talk a bit, snapchats me again the next 2 weekends, then tags me in something on social media she knew I'd like, then starts snapchatting me in response to things I post just to mess with me like playfully not in a mean way, then the other day, the biggest thing she did yet, liked and commented on a 3 day old pic of mine. The comment was about a little inside joke her and I had.

 

Is she doing this to try to come back and get me to text her? Since girls can be hesitant to text first, especially after 2 people had a little break. And she believes guys should initiate that. If this were any other girl that I didn't have a past with, I'd say she's flirting through social media and I'd text her. Or is this for attention? Giving me attention so I'll give t back to her. Orrr maybe just lightly keeping in touch till she feels she's over him and can move on so she can come back to me. It's been 4 months since their break up

 

What do you guys think??

[Wiseman2]

She jumped into this upset about her ex but far from being over what happened. And they have a child so must stay in contact.

 

Expect a lot of ups and downs and moods and hot/cold, on/off, etc. while she recovers from him.

 

Unfortunately, when she is recovered and ready for a relationship she will move on because she will not want to remember this time, including you as a reminder of when she was hurting and need a crutch. All you can do is get out of the line of fire.

So this girl and I start talking just 2-3 weeks after the got out of a 2.5 year relationship. tells me her and I moved way too fast, she's not ready for it yet

[m7592]

She jumped into this upset about her ex but far from being over what happened. And they have a child so must stay in contact.

 

Expect a lot of ups and downs and moods and hot/cold, on/off, etc. while she recovers from him.

 

Unfortunately, when she is recovered and ready for a relationship she will move on because she will not want to remember this time, including you as a reminder of when she was hurting and need a crutch. All you can do is get out of the line of fire.

 

Yeah, I don't know we'll see. She might move

on and come back to me. But maybe not. If not oh well, honestly I'd probably be dodging a bullet here not getting involved with a girl this young with a kid and all the baby daddy drama to follow and who knows what else. We really did have something great going though. Like I said, everything we did just felt so right together, first time we hung out it felt like we had known each other for months or years, never gotten along better with any girl ever. But why do you think she'd keep contacting me the way she is? If she had no interest at all she obviously wouldn't be doing it soo....?

[Wiseman2]

She needs a crutch right now, she's hurting from her breakup.

But why do you think she'd keep contacting me the way she is? If she had no interest at all she obviously wouldn't be doing it soo....?

[m7592]

She needs a crutch right now, she's hurting from her breakup.

 

Yeah I guess. Just seems like a strange way to handle it. By flirting on social media.

[Scoe141]

I'm going to echo wiseman, save yourself a headache down the road.

 

Lets recap:

 

She's 19.

She JUST ended a 2.5 year relationship.

She has a newborn with him.

She told you she's scared and can't get into another relationship.

She's been hot and cold.

She gets weird and irritated very easily.

Evidently she hates her life and her mood swings have been awful.

 

What are you asking again?

[m7592]

I'm going to echo wiseman, save yourself a headache down the road.

 

Lets recap:

 

She's 19.

She JUST ended a 2.5 year relationship.

She has a newborn with him.

She told you she's scared and can't get into another relationship.

She's been hot and cold.

She gets weird and irritated very easily.

Evidently she hates her life and her mood swings have been awful.

 

What are you asking again?

 

Haha true. Is 4 months still JUST ending a relationship? But this was all 2 months ago she told me this and the mood swings were bad, well they were bad when we talked like 5-6 weeks ago after she hit me up saga in. We stopped talking last week of June. Basically I'm asking why would she be contacting me the way she is. Which wiseman said was just as an emotional crutch. Which still I don't get how her liking my stuff and commenting on it about inside jokes we used to have and responding to my snapchat stories is a crutch. But okay.

 

But really, like I said earlier, probably dodging a bullet here not getting involved with her. A single mom that's a mess at 19 who smokes and drinks, no hobbies or interests, her life is take care of the child Monday through Friday, party on weekends. She hardly works, doesn't go to college, she's still so so close to her ex's family, and he will ALWAYS be in the picture so probably a lot of baby daddy drama in the future. There's a wholeee lot of beautiful single childless women without all the mess and baggage. Only reason I was into her is emotions are just a switch I can turn off and on and like I said, how well we got along surprisingly hasn't been close to the connection me and any other girl have ever had.

[Wiseman2]

Sounds like 'dodging a bullet' is a bit of an understatement here. dodging a bullet here not getting involved with her. A single mom that's a mess at 19 who smokes and drinks, no hobbies or interests, her life is take care of the child Monday through Friday, party on weekends. She hardly works, doesn't go to college, she's still so so close to her ex's family, and he will ALWAYS be in the picture so probably a lot of baby daddy drama in the future.

[m7592]

Sounds like 'dodging a bullet' is a bit of an understatement here.

 

😂😂😂😂dodged an atomic bomb

 

But yeah she was cool besides all that. Feelings for her go away more and more every week so couple more it'll be done with

[Wiseman2]

dodged an atomic bomb.But yeah she was cool besides all that. Feelings for her go away more and more every week so couple more it'll be done with

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[m7592]

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Lol. Single mom at 19 is normally enough to turn me away but for some reason wasn't