confusion

[littlekitten]

My boyfriend had a affair with a girl a month ago. Then I left him with a broken heart.I didnt want to see him though I have to pick my stuff I left in his place. He strated to call me,txt me and chat with me in the internet.He told me that we had great time together and I am the nice girl which deserve the best. And he wants to keep the relationship with me,etc.

I went to see him yesterday to get my stuff back. And I txt him in advance.He said it was ok for him. That was a nightmare to me. When I saw him, I found out I still have feeling to him. Then I tried to be cool and when I was packing my stuff. I saw that new girl coming upstairs. I lost control suddently, I was very upset and cried a lot. Then I left his house.

He sent me a txt at 11:30p.m to say he is very sorry for what happened and ask me 2 forgive him.

I dont know what I should do? I really had a very good time with him but I cannot bear he goes out with another girl. I know he will ask me out for coffee cause he did a few times before and I refused.

Do you think we could be friend? Or I just need to keep my chin up not to see him again.

I deeply love him thus why I am cofused.

[MetallicAguy]

Well if you want to get over him plain and simple; No Contact. If you want to be his friend, you will probably become more depressed over him but you will have to put up with it, if your not strong enough I advise you not see him. If he texts you and asks why your not hanging out with him or your ignoring him you can say "It's too painful for me to see you with another girl."

[ghozt]

i suggest you never go out with him agin cuz history repeats it self and you need to get rid of him prmantitly (then agin i totaly hate cheaters they all need to die )

[vhshowdown]

I agree littlekitten, your best bet right now is NO CONTACT. If you try to be friends with someone you love and they are going out with someone else, it will slowly eat you alive. Right now, you are in no state to try and cope with that stress. Use no contact for a few weeks, gather your thoughts and your strength, then maybe you MAY want to contact him, or you MAY say he is just no worth it!!

It will be hard, everyone in here will tell you that, but keep posting and we will help you thru it.

 

Good Luck

[Meow18]

I'm really sorry about what happened. He did a real jerky thing and you deserve so much better than that. You have to understand that.

 

Right now I don't think it would be a good idea to have a friendship with him. You still have feelings for him and the only way to make them go away is to try to get your mind off of him. The best way is no contact. Don't call him, don't answer his calls. It will be hard, but its really the best thing for you if you want to get over him.

[Dgirllamius]

I don't think it's possible to have friendships with someone you've been out with. Theres only one guy I've been able to keep a steady friendship with but thats only because we were together for a week lol. It didn't hurt on my side, but his side it did...but I think he's getting over it now.

 

I'd cut all contact off from this guy. He did a bad thing by cheating on you and you didn't deserve it. It'll hurt you even more if you stay friends because you'll always be thinking "What if". I do the what if thinking about my ex a lot...what if I didn't do that, or what if I tried a little harder. I can't bare to see him anymore, nor be friends with him, especially after what he did (he didn't cheat, he just robbed me of my trust and money).

[ghozt]

I don't think it's possible to have friendships with someone you've been out with. Theres only one guy I've been able to keep a steady friendship with but thats only because we were together for a week lol. It didn't hurt on my side, but his side it did...but I think he's getting over it now.

 

I'd cut all contact off from this guy. He did a bad thing by cheating on you and you didn't deserve it. It'll hurt you even more if you stay friends because you'll always be thinking "What if". I do the what if thinking about my ex a lot...what if I didn't do that, or what if I tried a little harder. I can't bare to see him anymore, nor be friends with him, especially after what he did (he didn't cheat, he just robbed me of my trust and money).

 

thats not true cuz me and an ex are best friends

[Dgirllamius]

OK in most cases

[DragonGirl724]

he needs to stop getting what he wants....he wanted to cheat, he wants to be friends, & he wants you to accept all this & forgive him. heres what you do: laugh in his face, pity the girl hes with, & bid him adieu! honor yourself, trust me; you dont want a guy like this. the attachment will fade.

 

-DG724

[shady]

dragon girls right, just try to think about all the bad things he did, they might help it make it easier to not see him anymore, i could tell you to stop thinking about someone, but that's impossible, the only way to lessen your thoughts and keep him away is just plain and simple, ignore him

[littlekitten]

Thanks for everyone's advice. I will keep ignore him for a month and start my new life at that same time.

The most difficult is that we have same friends. It makes them very difficult too. My best mate is his best man's girlfriend. If we meet each other accidently. Is it best to treat him like everyone else?

 

Thanks again!

[DragonGirl724]

its ok to be a llittle cold to him...he dogged you pretty badly! but otherwise be cival..but id ignore him for a while. he sounds like a selfish jerk.

 

-DG724