Please help me!!!!

[Desired1]

hey

I know that i havent posted for something close to a century but i need to. I need to say this but i have no place to but here. I am starting to think that the source of all my SI is my my mom. I mean, i don't ever SI unless i am around her. And when I am not around her I never feel depressed. When I am not around her i am the happiest person in the world and i can be free without worry of being criticized or hit. Do u guys think that i am nuerotic or what??? Help me please

Do u guys think that it really is her or is it me?

[annie24]

What does SI stand for?

[Desired1]

Self injury=SI

[annie24]

oh wow. I definitely think you should see a therapist about this. Yeah, I think it's quite possible that your relationship with your mother is a huge part of it. She should NOT be hitting you. I don't have a great relationship with my mom either. But, beyond that, I can't really help you. This is a serious problem. Please don't hurt yourself! If you talk to a therapist, they can help you come up with other ways to release the pain, anger, and frustration. Please take care of yourself!

[Desired1]

Do u know where i can get therapy? I know that i need it but i dont' know how to go with out my mom knowing. Thanx

[annie24]

Talk to your school counselor. That's what they are trained to do.

[berzerk]

hmm... have you had a lot of bad situations with her in the past? Because if not, then yeah, i'd suggest seeing someone to help ya out. You may even want to try to talk to her and tell her how you feel. I wish you the best of luck ^^v.

[annie24]

Ok - I'm going to try not to sound too silly. But, everyone's parents mess them up. And one day, when we are parents, we'll mess up our kids too. It's the cycle of life. Desired, I'm sorry that your mom isn't good to you. I bet that you are a terrific young lady, very smart, and a good person. Your mom should NOT be that mean to you. You know, at 15, you're not old enough yet to be a bad/stupid/whatever person. You're still growing and developing. I think your mom is angry at herself about stuff, I don't know what. But, she's unfairly taking it out on you. You are a good, sweet person - never forget that. Please, try not to take what your mom says personally. Get some help, please. And yes, you may want to talk to her about how she makes you feel.

[Desired1]

hey thanx alot. I really appreciate you guys taking time out to respond to me.

 

Berzerk my mom is not the type of person i can talk to and hold an actual two sided conversation with. Everything she says is subjective and biased to the point that I have no liberties and am barely... oh whats the word....

A person...??? I know that she loves me but she sure does have a pretty screwed up way of showing it. But... maybe thats just me, i mean, don't all teenagers go through a little hormone thing when they think the whole world is against them or is that just me??

 

And annie24, how can i not take what my mom says personally when what she says is directed right at me? I don't know what to do. I thought about hitting back but shes my mom and i love her(shes left bruises and cut on me before)and dont' want to hurt her. I sometimes wonder if she ever really cared or if im the source of all her issues.

 

What should i do... Or what do u think of my situation??

--Thanx for all ur help

[dpressedone89]

okay well ive been in a similar situation i think therapy is a good idea if you dont want to go through the school if you have a health center near you they often provide therapy

[brando]

Counseling would be a good thing. Also get the book "A Child Called It" I forget the authors name, but it is about the severe abuse he suffered from his mother. This mans story is amazing, he turned his life around completely. As far as the SI not sure if this book deals with this subject.

 

I hope this helps.

 

Be well.

[Prosper]

Hi Pal,

It is natural to have such feelings. It is the pressure u gotten from her. There is nothing wrong from keeping a distance from her, coz everybody seeks for security, esp after bad experiences or some intuitive feelings that tell us so.

 

This is what we call emotional comfortability.

 

Get a close frd whom u trust, and aware about ur situation, and soft towards the whole matter, and TALK ABOUT IT.

 

By doing this adjustment a couple of times, u will move away from the pressure as u let the air out of a tight bottle.

 

Do what it is comfortable for u and gradually happiness will find its way to u.

 

Keeping prayer for u..

[berzerk]

It might be hormonal. I've had alot of those feelings so dont feel alone on that. Like A.D.D, I'd have these weird feelings like something messed up was about to happen to me. But then I took mediaction and i've been feeling alot better. Maybe some medication can be the answer? Or maybe your mom is actually how you make her appear? Either way, you still need to talk to someone locally you can trust for help.

[chicksport]

hey,

i also somewhat of that kind of problem but with my dad. and i also SI for some of the things my dad says to me or what he attempts to do (hitting wise) he's threatened may times and thats what causes me mostly to go cut and its when ever im around him.....but cutting is a bad solution it wont make things better between you and ur mom just like it wont solve the problem between me and my dad....you can try talkin to your mom about how you feel....it didnt help me cuz my dad didnt seem to want to listen and just continues to do the same crap he does but it might work for you (if she's someone that wants to listen) but another way is talkin to a close friend that you trust cuz talkin about it can help there might not be anything that they can do but talk but talkin rele does help especially if they know what your going through. Talking to a counselor may help to....but idk i havent gone to my school counselors only cuz mine wouldnt help me but hopefully the one(s) at your school are better. but please dont cut to cope there are better way....im trying myself not to use cutting to cope its hard. but also try not to let the things that your mom says to you, i know hard that is cuz i what my dad says to me i usually take it out on myself which isnt right......but try talking to someone

 

i wish you the best of luck!

and feel free to pm me if you want to talk

 

~chicksport

[imagi]

Most people have some sort of trigger that is their thing that started them cutting and keeps them cutting. I know with me, my mom's family is a really bad situation for me to be in, and it was what was intitially enough stress for me to want to start cutting. Your situation makes perfect sense, and I think it's awesome that you're able to see where your pattern is and who your pattern is with.

 

Therapy sounds like a good idea, but also learning to stand up for yourself with your mother is something that seems inevitable. You have to be able to say mom, I'm growing up, you can't do this to me at some point otherwise that trigger will stay there even with the best of counsellors.

 

Cheers,

Miranda