reaching O

[emma34]

boyfriend and I haven't been together that long but he is very persistent in the fact that he wants me to reach orgasm. With past boyfriend, I have found there is really only way to do this other than oral sex, and that is playing with myself during sex. For my ex, it turned him on, so it worked well. But with new boyfriend - not comfortable to do this in front of him yet - took over a year to feel comfortable enough to do it with ex.. Should I bother even telling him that this is how I get off?

[PAdreamer]

So basically what you're saying is that you need clitoral stimulation, which is normal. A good thing to do is to be on top. With you on top, he can reach down and use his thumb to give you that stimulation while you control the actual intercourse. That way he's getting involved and giving you what you need, and you don't have to feel silly about touching yourself. This works well for me, so you might give it a try.

[Mun]

I understand that this is a new relationship and you aren't completely comfortable with him yet, but girl, you won't get what you need if you don't ask for it. Your boyfriend wants to please you--Tell him what you need--I bet he will be happy to help

[Day_Walker]

It is also possible to stimulate your clitoris from other positions. A common one that both guys and girls like is doggystyle and all he has to do is reach around a stimulate you manually. I believe that you should tell him thats how you get off.

[Beec]

I would have him try stimulating you either doggy or spooning with you guiding his hand and fingers. See how it works.

[Iwanthim]

If you don't feel completely comfortable with him yet why are you having sex?

[Meow18]

If you don't feel completely comfortable with him yet why are you having sex?

 

I agree with Iwanthim here. Communication is the most important thing in a relationship, so if you aren't yet comfortable enough to communicate openly about everything, maybe you shouldn't be having sex quite yet.

 

Like someone else said, he won't know unless you tell him, so thats really all there is to do. Don't be embarrassed, its normal and I'm sure he won't get turned off by it or anything. Most likely he'll be turned on by it and want to help.

[PAdreamer]

That's a good point. People involved in sexual relationships should be comfortable talking to each other about their sexual needs. If you're not able to do this, maybe you shouldn't be having sex with him yet.

[sisterlynch]

I can understand that it is hard to talk about certain issues with some kinds of people. How do you think that he will respond?

 

Another thing that you can do is suggest that you heard this story from a friend...let him guess that you are really talking about you, yourself.

 

Do you include porn or sex toys at all? that might be a good direction that you can take it in...I just might bet that it wouldn't bother him that much.

[11flower]

Another thing I think, no two things, is that I agree with what some are suggesting, that is, that you may not be completely comfortable with him.

If you are not, it might be difficult to truly open up and let yourself fly, if this makes sense.

 

Should you rethink this? It's not something you should feel forced or inhibited or uncomfortable about, but if this is so, please think about what some more helpful people are saying. You may want to please him while not knowing whether he completely accepts you. But this is something only you can determine.

 

11Flower

[aShy]

whenever i am on top of my bf.. he will use his finger to arouse/touch my clitoris.. it feels gReat man.. really.. can faster reach ur orgasm..

[Universe]

I read somewhere that 70% of women (or something like that) need manual stimulation during sex to get off most of the time. For a long time I felt inadequate because I could only get my girl to go off once in a while without directly using my finger on her clitoris during sex. So make sure he understands that it's normal and that it's a small but fundamental thing in the vast ocean of sexual experience. Tell him that the most important thing isn't IF he gets you off, but HOW sensually and seductively he does it.

 

as far as tips go: another thing that's fun sometimes is to have him pull out and use the shaft of his erect penis to stimulate your clitoris. This is good for teasing also.