Fargo1990 Posted March 8, 2015 Share Posted March 8, 2015 Hi, this is my first thread but I really didn't know whew else to turn with what I'm feeling... I'm 24 and been in a relationship for close to 6 years. I've recently started a new job and been away on training for a few weeks with the same people. Without being big headed, I've never been particularly bad looking and do take care of how I look, so am used to occasional comments about that and enjoy a soft flirt and receiving compliments but have never considered taking it further than just that. The past few weeks however I've been getting to know a girl I've been on the full course with over 3 weeks, she's really good looking, flirtatious and has a great personality. If I was single, I wouldn't have spared a second thought to take things further with her. And that's what's driving me crazy... I can not stop thinking about her, and what's worrying me is how strong can my currw t relationship actually be? I mean, spending close on three weeks with someone and consider pursuing that opportunity over my current relationship... any talk of commitment to a house and kids with my current partner scares the hell out of me, I'd rather try to work abroad by myself, I love meeting new people, I want to ttavel and adventure and my current relationship is the only girl I've had sex with. I feel like I'm missing out on so much and being held back, I feel like it's my current relationship that's holding me down but I can't bare the fact of breaking my girlfriend's heart and thinking I'm being an egotistical A hole and is this something worth fixing or have we had a good run? Anyone have any advice on what to do or had similar experience? Link to comment
rainbows Posted March 8, 2015 Share Posted March 8, 2015 It is perfectly normal to have a bit of a - BIT of a crush on someone outside a relationship. Its normal, and you are not cheating on your partner by finding someone attractive. One question : 1. Do you love your Girlfriend? Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted March 8, 2015 Share Posted March 8, 2015 Ok, first of all. People often get grass is greener syndrome. When we meet someone new there is the butterflies, the passion, the excitement of getting to know them, going on dates,first time you have sex etc. But eventually all relationships 'settle' you move in together and see eachother all day and it takes WORK to keep the relationship alive. Still being thoughtful, generous, having sex and doing nice things for eachother and not letting the relationship get stale. The grass is green where YOU water it. However if you truly don't want to be with your girlfriend and have felt like this for a while it is fairer to her to end it. She deserves someone that wants her 100% and who loves her 100%. You got together fairly young so it's natural to want to explore and try the 'single life' however don't if you do break up with her make sure its a break up. Don't keep her hanging on whilst you have your fun. Link to comment
mhowe Posted March 8, 2015 Share Posted March 8, 2015 You are 24....6 years with your gf....and you don't want to settle down. You have outgrown the relationship and you should let your gf know sooner than later. Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted March 8, 2015 Share Posted March 8, 2015 I think regardless of this little crush , you sound ready to get out there as a single man . Maybe she has being the catalyst that has pushed you to realise you want to experience life on your own now and experience other women . Link to comment
dave_1966 Posted March 8, 2015 Share Posted March 8, 2015 Alternatively, listen to the above advice and leave a stable loving relationship to pursue an unknown entity which may or may not work out. Once you leave, you leave for better or worse. Link to comment
Denguin Posted March 8, 2015 Share Posted March 8, 2015 Sounds to me like you have a case of the Grass is Greener Syndrome. You like this new girl because she's new and exciting. You've gotten accustomed to your current girlfriend, and that in turn has made things seem stale. 6 years is a long time. Not a lot of relationships make it that far. You'd be throwing away something very special if you were to pursue this other girl. That's not to say GIGS is necessarily "wrong"... To me, it's just human nature. You can't fight your feelings. If you feel you want out of your long term relationship, then that's that. If you truly want to go travelling and meet new people, then your current girl doesn't fit in your lifestyle. Follow your heart, and sooner or later you'll find out of the grass is really greener on the other side. There's no use staying a relationship where you're already halfway out the door. That's not fair to you or your girlfriend. Link to comment
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