Ginger1 Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 Ok here is the deal. I met a guy (call alex) my age (posted about him recently) hung out on 3 occasions and I don't think either of us will be pursuing that. But on each of these occasion, alexs friend Nick was there. nick is actually a very sweet guy, really nice, seems genuine. but he is 19. I never even once thought anything other than what a nice kid. I am 26! He just sent me a text seeing if I wanted to hang out sometime and he thought I was really easy to get along with and enjoyed talking to me. Like I said, he's a really sweet boy and I'd be ok JUST hanging out, but you know, he's probably not thinking that. soo what do I tell him without being mean? Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 Simply ask him if he means to hang out as friends or hang out like a date. See what he says. If he says like a date let him know that you are very flattered but you prefer to date guys a little closer to your own age. You have nothing to loose and possibly a friend to gain right? Lost Link to comment
Ginger1 Posted January 27, 2015 Author Share Posted January 27, 2015 ^thank you, good advice. I told this guy I'm friends with at work and he was giving me a hard time about dismissing this guy just because he is 19. Part of me feels that way, the old age is just a number, but I feel like 7yrs Is a big age difference at this point in our life. eh story of my life Link to comment
Denguin Posted January 30, 2015 Share Posted January 30, 2015 Age is just a number, but I think it does come into consideration when someone is that young. A lot of maturing still needs to be done at age 19. Hell, I thought I was a lot more mature than any of my friends at 18-19. Looking back, I definitely was... But I was no where close to who I am today. Link to comment
Ginger1 Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 ^yes I agree. age is just a number and it would be completely hypocritical of me to dismiss because of age, bc I wouldn't hesitate to date someone in their 30s. I don't know him too well but he does seem to have his head screwed on right. But im pretty sure everyone is much different from when theyre late teens to mid 20s. he invited me to a get together at his place this weekend. I will be out of town anyway so I had to decline. I'll see if I can maybe get together with him this week and just chat a bit. Link to comment
SummerNight Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 I'd say forget the age thing. It REALLY is in your head. Heck, I know a guy in my choir who is 17 or so and he acts way more mature than some 35 year old men. If you say that you liked being around him then give it a try. You might find something awesome. Link to comment
SGuru Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 I think this 19 year is still into that puppy love thing. He may have a infatuation for you. Still pretty immature if you ask me. From your question, I probably feel that you will not want to go into a relationship with someone younger than you. If you are afraid of hurting him, then don't procrastinate. Tell him you treat him like a younger brother and you don't expect anything more. It hurts but he is just 19, he will forget after a while. After you had done that, keep it casual. Link to comment
SGuru Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 I think this 19 year is still into that puppy love thing. He may have a infatuation for you. Still pretty immature if you ask me. From your question, I probably feel that you will not want to go into a relationship with someone younger than you. If you are afraid of hurting him, then don't procrastinate. Tell him you treat him like a younger brother and you don't expect anything more. It hurts but he is just 19, he will forget after a while. After you had done that, keep it casual. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 I might not dismiss him so fast. My friend's daughter is 19, married, her husband was 19 when they married and is very mature and responsible. What have you got to lose if you went on a few dates and learned more about him? Certainly we hear about 19 year old women with 26 year old guys (I know, sometimes women mature faster....). Link to comment
Ginger1 Posted February 8, 2015 Author Share Posted February 8, 2015 Thanks for some great perspectives! He is a sweet guy, I haven't seen him since a couple weekends ago. He has texted me casually, including tonight just seeing what's going on. if he asks me out on an actual date I'll go and see what the feeling is. Thanks as always Link to comment
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