Is he shy?

[Mels]

Two months after being completely heart broken by my ex, who wasn't even worth it, I have decided that I am finally ready to move on with my life and start dating again.

 

I have always been extremely shy, and this year I decided that I'm going to change that. A friend of mine is trying to fix me up with a guy that he works with. My friend said that this guy is also shy in some aspects, and he told me to initiate the first contact in order to reassure him that I was interested.

 

I called him. (Very proud of myself, by the way! ) We talked for about 15 min and then he had to go to a meeting. He told me he'd call back when it was over, he did and we talked for another two hours. Which is really weird for me because I am not a talking on the phone person.

 

Anyway, at the end of our conversation he told me that I could call him sometime today if I wanted to. At first I didn't think anything of it, but then I guess the insecurities kicked in and I started wondeing why I had to call him, why doesn't he want to call me?

 

I'm pretty sure I'm reading too much into this, but I was just wondering what everyone thought. Do you think that he's shy and is just afraid of rejection or something like that? That's what I initially thought, and then I was like, what if he just doesn't want to pursue this any further and is afraid to tell me?

 

Thanks for the help!

[xmrth]

It's SO much easier to start a conversation when you're the one getting the call. I always have people call me first because it's just easy.

He is definitely shy, but even people who aren't shy can be when initiating a phone call. Also, he might think it's your turn to call and wants to receive a call from you instead of the other way around.

[youngin]

yeah it would be weird being the person to call everytime

[GettingOverIt]

I agree with xmrth... You seem to be taking turns calling each other, and it is/was your turn... I wouldn't read to much into it, but you might want to make a point of telling him that he can call you. He may be shy enough that without an invitation, he may not feel like he can call you. If this relationship develops, this will be one of the things you two will laugh about some day, but for now, just take it slow and easy, and let him know (or you could even suggest a time when) it's ok to call you....

[shuntaro603]

I see what you are saying. Maybe he is shy. It is awkward being the one who calls alll the time. Maybe next time you should tell him that it is ok for him to call you. I think he was just being polite and a little shy.

[69_king]

Well, hes not saying "You can call me sometime but I won't call you again" He may call again. But I would call him first.

 

Personally I like it when someone calls me sometimes because it tells me that they were thinking about me and they are interested.

 

If I had to do all the calling then I would feel like "Why do I have to do all the work? She must not be that interested."

[jabean]

If he put it out there for you to call him, then go ahead. It sounds fine. But if you get the same response this next time too. Well, then I would think that he's just not interested enough to put any effort into it. When, a guy likes you (shy or not) he will call you too, and not expect you to do the pursuing.

[Mels]

Thanks for all the advice! He really was just shy.

 

We pretty much do take turns calling eachother now. I like it that way. We haven't ever met yet, (we're going out Saturday night) but conversation is easy for us and we have a lot of things in common, so maybe...

 

For any shy people out there like me, tho, who tend to read too much into stuff and talk themselves out of doing things. Just go for it. If the response is positive, then good for you, and if it's negative than at least you learned something. If that makes any sense.