bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 My whole thought on this and mhoe you agreed...if you can not respect each others thoughts and feelings there's not much of a relationship. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 mhoe, So you don't believe in respect?? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA this is a rich comment and exactly what your GF is saying about you. Did you post to get opinions, which you now have, or to argue with us that you are right? I couldn't care less whether we agree. My opinion? I would be done with you, if I were your GF, and sad too, to discover how little you understand of rich family ties. Do you remember being a kid and having a sleepover? Grown ups do that too. Especially at times like this. Get over yourself. Respect. Really? Oh goodness that is rich. I am currently having a difficult time finding some. Link to comment
mhowe Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 My whole thought on this and mhoe you agreed...if you can not respect each others thoughts and feelings there's not much of a relationship. You are saying that respect is acquiescing to your insecurities? Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 mhoe, how did she disrespect me...when someone you are in a relationship with ask you to either do something or not do something there is normally a reason. my reason is because of the distance was down the street. like I stated if it were thousands of miles away not a problem. If the kids were deathly sick not a problem, is she never saw them not a problem....because I was uncomfortable with her there for 4 nights she is close anyways...total disrespect on her part...my opinion Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 mhoe, again...where did I say I accused her...I said she claimed to have slept in the spare room...no where did I said I accused her and nowhere does it say that I told her that Well if you're not accusing her of sleeping with her ex then why did you break up with her? Do you find the mere fact that she was in the same house as him overnight to be disrespectful? If so, that is your prerogative but you sir I suspect have a habit of cutting off your nose to spite your face. It is good to have solid personal boundaries in place but when they are as rigid as yours, then they're just walls. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 Having respect for your opinion is NOT the same as subjugating herself to it. If it were, then you would be at an impasse, because you would have to subjugate yoursself to her opinion and feelings as well. Respect for your feelings: She can listen to you, have empathy for your insecurity at losing her, assure you with phone calls or texts from the house at times that aren't an imposition to her hosts. She still gets to follow her heart to stay with her family. After 4 years, given the proximity, you might have found your own closeness with her family, but you haven't, which is telling. Link to comment
mhowe Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 Because you were uncomfortable with her spending time with her daughter and grand kids...she should do what you believe. Sorry dude, put pandering to your insecurities would be the road to hell. Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 IthinkIcan, Yes I am asking for opinions...your right... disrespect is disrespect.... not arguing just expressing my thoughts and so far only you 2 ladies have responded...I would like to hear from some of the guys on here as well Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 I had no problem with the 1 night....4 nights yes and when you asked please to not stay at the ex's and you say so your going to regardless what I wanted...disrespect sorry Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 I had no problem with the 1 night....4 nights yes and when you asked please to not stay at the ex's and you so your going to regardless what I wanted...disrespect sorry How's that wall working for you so far? Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 Heck I don't have a wall..she might...theres more fish in the ocean... Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 Heck I don't have a wall..she might...theres more fish in the ocean... Like I said... she may not realize it right now but she IS better off now that you've left her. Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 Yes that is true...she may be better off...but so am I Link to comment
mhowe Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 Heck I don't have a wall..she might...theres more fish in the ocean... I have no idea what this means. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 Well then, there is no issue. She will find someone who respects her judgment and you will find someone who respects yours, and if you are lucky, not at the expense of her own, which is what you have asked of your ex. Starting over is tough. Good luck with it. Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 Thatwasthen stated how's the wall feeling now...my response was I am not running into any wall...and the fish statement means others other women out there so can survive just fine without disrespect Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 thatwasthen..sorry but I disagree about being hard starting over...there's lots of single ladies. Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 Bottom line....if you can not respect each others decisions and know what a relationship takes then best your single until you find someone that will respect each other Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 I think you are mistaking until they obey you with mutual respect. Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 respect is not obeying....your confused Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 oh...wait.....did I mention the GF and I live 1200 miles apart... Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 respect is not obeying....your confused i'm not confused.. you're quite transparent in your need to be obeyed which you call "respect." Good luck in your future dating adventures. You've gotten opinions that you didn't want to hear, that you'll not consider and that's that. Link to comment
bhbull Posted October 27, 2014 Author Share Posted October 27, 2014 Thatwasthen, Yes I got opinions and that is what I asked for...do I agree no....just like you don't agree Link to comment
mhowe Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 oh...wait.....did I mention the GF and I live 1200 miles apart... Well then, think how much money you will save if you fish locally! Link to comment
plainsnymph Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 um, let me get this straight. your in a ldr with this women for 4 years and your upset that shes spending time with her family? If she has a 22 year old daughter i would put her at a minimum of 43 which i would think would put you around there as well. in your 40's your upset over your long term girlfriend spending time with her family. i can tell you, it straight does not compute in my brain. If she was doing something sneaky she would not be forward about it. also it is none of your business what she does with her family. Why do you even care? if you dont think shes cheating, are you insecure shes with her family and having a good time supporting them? I could see someone in their 20's or younger being upset over where their girlfriend sleeps but a man in his 40's it sounds ridiculous and like you have a lot of insecurity. Link to comment
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