First Time Dating older woman

[cantgetoverher]

Here is my situation. I am a 24 year old male have dated younger women all my life (at least 3-4 years younger). I recently got out of a 3 year relationship with someone who was 3 years younger then me. I just startd seeeing someone but she is 6 years older then me. She looks beautiful and as young as someone who is 8 years younger (works out etc...). Is 6 years a lot of difference if the woman is older? I am worried that her biological clock will start ticking or if i will regret it later when she's older. Any advice?

[AbbAbb]

i wouldent think so..if yall really like eachother then it shouldent matter at all! jus make jokes about it....laugh it off! LOL good luck! go get 'em tiger! lol

[shes2smart]

I'm 11 years older than my husband....so 6 years is nothing. If you get along well and have the same relationship goals, age only becomes a problem if you allow it to be.

 

As for her biological clock, have you ever asked her if she even wants children? I knew when I was 25 that I never wanted to have children, and I haven't changed my mind about that in the last 15 years.

 

If her family plans and your family plans don't match up, you're gonna have problems no matter what your ages.

[Day_Walker]

I wouldnt worry about her biological clock until the situation elevates itself. As of right now you said that you just started seeing her. I doubt her biological clock is going to start ticking that quickly and if it does leave the situation if you arent ready to handle that kind of responsibility.

[cantgetoverher]

She just turned 30 a few month ago and I am 24. I am worried that I might regret it later down the road in say 3 years or so and hurt her. Since she just turned 30, is hot, financially sucessful (so am i), is unmarried, chilldess it makes me wonder why she isnt taken yet. Is this the case for most women this age? If they aren't taken yet is that a red flag? Do they feel like they need to grab someone before its too late or is that my paranoia?

[shes2smart]

She just turned 30 a few month ago and I am 24. I am worried that I might regret it later down the road in say 3 years or so and hurt her. Since she just turned 30, is hot, financially sucessful (so am i), is unmarried, chilldess it makes me wonder why she isnt taken yet. Is this the case for most women this age? If they aren't taken yet is that a red flag? Do they feel like they need to grab someone before its too late or is that my paranoia?

 

Not everyone marries early. Not everyone who delays marriage has something wrong with them.

 

I didn't get married until 2 months after my 38th birthday. I have no children. I was not then and am not now a basket case, psycho-b***h, unattractive or have any other major problem.

 

What I was then, and still am now, is focused on career goals. I always had a definite idea of the kind of relationship I wanted to be in, and it took a while to find someone who not only shared that vision but was also prepared to do what it took to make it happen. I had several relationships, including a couple where the offer of marriage was on the table. In both of those cases, it didn't feel right to me so I passed on the offer.

 

When I did get married, it wasn't becaue I was "grabbing someone before it was too late." Before I met my husband, I had pretty much planned on being single for the duration of my life. If I couldn't have the type of relationship I really wanted, I saw no reason to settle for less, so single it was.

 

In my case, the reason I wasn't "taken" yet had more to do with the men I dated than anything wrong with me. Most of my exes have tried to contact me several years down the line and tried to get me back. Seems they came to some great realization after I left and they started dating again. I wouldn't think much of it if it was just one of my exes....but this has happened with EVERY guy I was involved with for a year or more.

 

Maybe you should stop looking for things wrong with her or this new relationship and just enjoy her company and see where your interaction goes. You're worrying too much about what MAY happen in the future. You'd be better off staying in the present moment and letting things unfold as they will.

 

If you really feel you need the answers to the questions you pose here, why not try asking her? She's the only one who'll be able to give you an accurate answer as to why she hasn't married thus far, if she wants any children, and so forth.

[cantgetoverher]

Thanks for the advice. I apologize if I offended anyone by insinuating the person was a nut case because of her age, but I was just putting my worries on the table. I have talked to her and she has the attitude of "lets not look too far in the future and worry about now" cause we just started. Maybe the older ones are more mature and stable then the younger ones.

[Emmylu]

Don't worry about hurting her. If she's 30, beautiful, and has her life together, chances are she will be the one to leave you if things don't work out.

 

Older women don't consider younger men a "catch". Not like how older men think a younger woman is a catch.

 

Sometimes older women just want to play, but the younger guy gets all serious and starts worrying about the future.

 

Maybe she likes you because you're naive. That can be kind of cute.

[11flower]

LOL! When I met my husband, he was around 23, I was 28. He was anxious about the age difference as well. I wouldn't worry though. 24 and 30 isn't that bad of an age difference. Take a look at Demi Moore and her 15-yrs-younger boyfriend--they're in love, or so the tabloids tell.

 

I wasn't married till I was 31. I had my last kid at 41. Perhaps the reason she's financially successful is *because* she hasn't gotten married. Have you asked her yet why she's never yet married? She obviously likes you or she wouldn't be with you. Why doubt yourself?

 

I think you've already been given very sound and awesome advice by everyone so far. It will work for you if you listen to it.

 

Trust me, 6 yrs is not, and even considering the stage of life where both of you are, too much difference. You're both *young*!

 

Have fun and enjoy your new friendship. Be yourself.

 

11Flower