How to take revenge on ex?

[janaka]

I would like to take revenge on my ex-girlfriend who had been cheating on me with her co-worker for seven months.

 

The problem is I'm currently in a foreign country. What would be the best way to break their immoral relationship? I want to break it up at all costs!

 

I'll be grateful if any of you can give me some ideas for effiecient vengence. I know revenge is not good. But I like personages such as Heathcliff very much. [/b]

[PrincessLinzay]

Wasting the time and energy thinking about it is no good. The best revenge is to move on. What goes around comes around. If she did it to you, it's only a matter of time before she does it to the other guy as well.

[amanda22]

yeah revenge is bad i know it hurts but you should let go. now in saying that i understand how you feel. i read that in japan there are these professional 'couple busters'. you pay alot of money to have a professional seduce one of the people and make them leave their significant other. you know any friends up for the job? thats the only thing i can think of and its something that happens naturally so they wouldnt think you were involved. ug, i feel so ashamed...

[Double J]

Dude, don't waste your time. Just move on. Revenge isn't going to take the pain away. If anything, let her know you're seeing someone else (even if it isn't true) so that she knows you could care less about her.

[janaka]

Amanda22,

 

Thanks for your tip. I wish I were a godfather I have some problem accepting that "moving on" idea. I think this is a crap originating from the Western relationship counsels though it obviously has merits. You know? The girl had cheated on me until I discovered it in June by accident. Even then, she wouldn't admit and refuse to apologize. His new boyfriend's parents are paying a visit to my country during this month, and I don't know what will happen next. Perhaps, I'll hear her wedding news in a few months. The thing is that it will be so convenient for the new guy to give committment to her for cost-effective reasons. I'm feeling very bitter because when I had proposed her in May, she was just beating around the bush, but didn't say no.

[amanda22]

i know it sucks and hurts. i agree with double j in that he said say you are seeing someone else even if its a lie. but the best thing is to just forget about it. the worst thing is to have information about your ex's relationship because you will compare, get angry and not be able to move on. you know too much and at the moment i know too much about my ex and his new relationship and it makes it harder to move on. they arent losing sleep over you so why lose sleep over them. try to focus on other things and try to be the better person. i know you want her to hurt like she hurt you and even if revenge may feel good now you might regret it later so be careful. a little story: my friend had a bf for 3 yrs. the last 6 months he was cheating on her with a 16 yr. old he is 23. he broke up with her cause he didnt want a serious relationship. after, she found out about the cheating. she almost called the cops on him for statutory rape of a minor to break up the couple, but she didnt. 4 months later, she says she is glad she didnt cause she would of looked like a jerk and regretted it. she is happy she was able to be the 'better' person. she know that what goes around comes around ( i think lindsay said that ) and that he will soon get his. it hurts but dont do anything irrational, keep yourself busy with other interests. if people put as much focus on finding a cure for cancer as they put on their ex's, we would have had a cure years ago...

[hockeyboy]

what will make her feel the worse (in time) is to kill her with kindness.

 

i never cheated but i did act wrongly once. i was seeing a girl and kinda transitioned to another girl. i never actually cheated, but still, what i did was wrong. i hurt the first girl really badly. at first i didnt care to much, i was being selfish and looking after number 1. i was going through a bunch of stuff and i shouldnt have been that way.

 

but anyways...the girl kept being nice to me etc..and after a lil bit i felt really badly. i called her and apologized to her a bunch of times cause i felt sorry for what i did. if she had gotten her revenge on me...i could have just lived the rest of my life not giving a ___ bout her.

[DragonGirl724]

i made a topic like this in the first post i typed my Update but theres a divider line with what i originally said (very similar to your post):

 

link removed

 

then i felt that justice was served on its own (not to mention that the dreaded ex is now single & miserable) hehehe thats all i wanted:

 

link removed

 

 

i completely understand your anger but in my opinion keep good karma...itll speak volumes of your character. God sees all.

hope some of this helps.

 

-DG724

[11flower]

Hi there,

 

If you think about it, she is not your wife; she's your girfriend. There is a difference in my mind between one who is your romantic partner and a spouse.

 

You sound so hurt, as you hadn't expected she would cheat on you like this? It sounds you had an agreement before you left to be in another country. Could be she got lonely? Had you kept in contact with her? It sounds you remained faithful to *her*. If you have, and she hasn't, then to me it sounds that the initial agreement wasn't as solid as you may have thought, or may now think. You are feeling she owes you? She may be feeling you owe her and went out to look for something? I don't know, of course. Just asking.

 

After reading a few of the other's responses, I think I agree that it might be an unhealthy move for you to purposely get revenge. When I have feelings like that, I just feel them. I think about what it is I would do, but my conscience, and my convictions keep me from carrying them out. It's true that "it" could come back around to you, as life always seems to promise it does. So, if you've been wronged, I believe you should tell your girlfriend--there's where the kindness could come in. Get advice on a good way to tell her. Maybe the kindness angle would work.

 

If you don't hurt her, she will be all the more accountable for her actions and having lied to you. You will also be in the light one day as to anything you decide so if I were you I'd think of my own future without malevolence to someone else. The reason for this is that our choices and actions will always produce some result, consequence. So, it's time for you to think of you and your best interest at this time. If you find someone with a more honest character, and you haven't harmed your ex-girlfriend, who will come out better in the long run? You will.

 

Try to be strong. Feel your feelings. Talk them out--all your fantasies of harming her. But don't carry them out and you will be sooo much better off when you find your next, better, beloved friend. Look for a girl you really want and don't settle for less. Take into account what ever it is was wasted with this girl. It's not worth spoiling your life over and you will live with your actions the rest of your life, if you carry out malevolence. If not, you will shine.

 

Flower

[DragonGirl724]

also if you do something vengeful to her, in the end you will look like the bad guy. leave this relationship on the note that u are bigger, stronger & more mature than to seek revenge to stoop down to her level.

 

you will get the revenge you crave for. but u may or may not know of it. but we all get hurt @ 1 pt or another & when she gets hurt, how she treated you will be one of the first things on her mind...& that is when justice is served! i jus saw on my ex's profile it says: "i need something i know he means he needs a GF, he had a similar msg up the other day too about missing having a girl in the wintertime. hahaha i just laugh b/c he knows he lost the best thing he had goin for him! especially around the holidays. ahhh the smell of revenge is sweet...but it took like 9months for him to miss having a girl around who loved him.

 

so jus give it time, she will get whats coming to her. we cant dodge karma sometimes. so keep yours clean!

 

-DG724

[Maynard]

I think the best revenge is just for you to be happy or a least look happy without her

[ebola316]

I fully intend to exact my revenge. He deserves it. First of all he cheated on his taxes last year, and I'm gonna let the IRS know about it. After that, I'm going to small claims court to get back some money he owes me. Then I'm gonna call him and tell him to come here and pick up the car he's been bugging me about. [i have 2 cars and I told him I was gonna give him the old one}I would have to pick him up at the bus, which is about 30 miles away. When he gets here,fully expecting the car and the title, I'm going to hand him the summons from court, and tell him to find his way off this wonderful mountain, that he left me on.

 

This guy took me for a ride through all my money and 3 states, so I intend to give him what he gave me.

[DragonGirl724]

wow, i didnt know all that went down. well i hope it all works out & it doesnt come back & kick you in the ***.

 

goodluck! i can see why youre so pissed.

 

-DG724

[11flower]

Wow, ebola,

 

Just hope he doesn't have a gun when he gets there!

 

11Flower

[janaka]

"If you think about it, she is not your wife; she's your girfriend. There is a difference in my mind between one who is your romantic partner and a spouse.

 

You sound so hurt, as you hadn't expected she would cheat on you like this? It sounds you had an agreement before you left to be in another country. Could be she got lonely? Had you kept in contact with her? It sounds you remained faithful to *her*."

 

Thanks for your advice, Flower. I've thought a lot from that angle too. I did make some viable arrangements before I had left. She also promised me to wait for a certain length of time. The thing is she landed a new job when I was away, and this guy came in as an exogeneous factor that destroyed the delicate equilibrum. I remained very faithful and devoted to her. She seemed to be "weak-willed" or "calculating". Most probably, both? In my mind, I'm still wondering how I can seek my revenge on her new guy, if not necessarily on her.

[savannahohsavannah]

Just forget her and move on. Wounded pride is lousy, but it's better to get even by being happy and getting to watch all the stupid things she does. This woman does not have a clue.

Not one. People who cheat wind up with a rep as a cheater and eventually only get players as dates. Losers!

[A_Friend]

I would like to take revenge on my ex-girlfriend who had been cheating on me with her co-worker for seven months.

 

The problem is I'm currently in a foreign country. What would be the best way to break their immoral relationship? I want to break it up at all costs!

 

I'll be grateful if any of you can give me some ideas for effiecient vengence. I know revenge is not good. But I like personages such as Heathcliff very much. [/b]

 

Hi janaka,

 

My story exactly matches with yours ,the only difference is that I am moving to a foreign country in March and I have got 2 more months to take a revenge but the more torturing thing is that I see her going out with this guy everyday and can't do anything in open or directly against anybody..

 

I would strongly recomend you to take on revenge so that you don't have sleepless nights & she doesn't repeat the same with someone else in future ..

 

I can suggest you couple of ways to take revenge ,just give me an idea about her nature of work and let me know if this guy is just a sub ordinate of your ex or he is her superior/boss etc ...

 

Your Friend

[rsxguy520]

just let it go. move on. revengening your ex will only lead to karma for you. like what everyone else is saying, what goes around, comes back around. =T

[Juliana]

I think it's funny how no one believes the person they take revenge on will ever come after them for it. The newspapers are full of "revenge." Mostly the criminal justice system gets involved after that.

 

The original post is more than two years old. Bet the OP doesn't give a d*mn anymore. So much for revenge.

[anggrace]

I agree that you should not waist your time. I seriously doubt that revenge will make you feel any better. The thought of what she did to you will not hurt any less and if her and her guy really love eachother, I doubt you can come between them. The only thing that will change is that you would of stooped to her level.

[ruby19]

I feel for you but it will be better for you to just walk away knowing you took the high road.

 

Read the thread on karma. She'll get hers eventually.

[A_Friend]

I also believe in good and bad karma but what to do with a person who is intentionally cheating on you and using you for some cheap gains .

 

There is a difference between breaking up with mutual understanding and cheating on someone with whom you might be planning to get married ...

 

Why one person should suffer , have sleepless nights, go to councellors and live in constant anxiety and the other person cheats on him/her thinking that he/she is smart and can play with the emotions/feelings of the person who cares for her/him.

 

I feel revenge is the only way if your really want to live peacefully ....

[blender]

 

I can NOT believe I just read this above statement from the poster "friend".. ugh.. I feel so sorry for you that you actually choose to feel a false sense of empowerment intentionally hurting someone else as revenge.. so I guess you are just letting your "self" and your "karma" know that YOU are no different than the one who cheated on you, you also like to sneak and hurt others too?..hmm...two wrongs...how does that make an emotionally sound respectful mature person "feel BETTER"?

 

I guess you are no different than your ex, you were lying all along too, you never really loved your ex, because love if it's authentic can also lovingly "let go" even if the ex has "cheated"..yes it hurts. but intentional hurtful revenge as a response???? In the long run, it will NOT make you feel better..

 

IN FACT: it will make you feel "less" in all areas of your life.

 

Any kind of "intentional hurtful revenge" upon another is so sad, so cowardly, so a reflection on how low YOU are willing to go so you can feel "tall"... yuk.

 

Instead, Try to have the courage to feel your pain, your heartache, grow through it, grow beyond the pain and leave what you "hoped could be with her" and go on to regain your sense of self and bring along your integrity and class as well...

[A_Friend]

Blender,It seems that you have gone too personal on this ...May be you yourself have cheated someone many times or have got used to loosing your friends that it doesn't make any difference to you if your ex or current is sleeping with someone else ...

 

I guess we are here to express our opinions and not to pass on judgments on who is lying and who is not ...

 

You seem to be an expert on love relationships and have become so mature that it's o.k. with you to have mulitple partners ...

 

I would rather expect a "judgement'' from someone who is comitted to someone for long and NOT FROM A PERSON like U..

 

Don't be too personal on anything ,it doesn't show your maturity only your frustation to win over others when you practically can't rule others (Or for that matter don't have b...s to do it )

[blender]

"Friend" sorry you are hurting so much...and I hope you find some relief from your heartache.

 

nothing personal about standards/values, it's just my response to your stating revenge is a good idea..that's all, it's okay that we disagree, I respect your opinion, I just don't agree with it.

 

For the record, I never said anything about "mutiple partners" or "cheating being okay" or that someone "is lying" or about being an "expert on love"..those are your words not mine.

 

Please know I do not take anything you say "personally", and I think it's important to be clear that I do not like to be mis-represented as to the content of my words. Again, I'm so sorry you are hurting and that someone did something during a relationship with you that was less than admirable.

 

When love is mature and authentic even when we are devastated and hurt, our self love can also lovingly "let go" of an ex, even if the ex has "cheated"..yes it hurts. but intentional hurtful revenge as a response?? In the long run, will NOT make you feel better..

 

IN FACT: it will make you feel "less" in all areas of your life.

 

Any kind of "intentional hurtful revenge" upon another is so sad, so cowardly, so a reflection on how low YOU are willing to go so you can feel "tall"... yuk.

 

Instead, Try to have the courage to feel your pain, your heartache, grow through it, grow beyond the pain and leave what you "hoped could be with her" and go on to regain your sense of self and bring along your integrity and class as well...