Please Help, Still Very Confused, Its been One month.

[magichat]

Hello there i am 25 years old and have been in a loving relationship for over 5 years. Just about a month ago my ex girlfriend broke up with me saying that she is not happy and that she really needs to be alone right now. I am very confuse about all of this. We had a great relationship and very rarely faught. Our communication level was a little down seeing that i work full time and she goes to school full time. We still managed to hand out quite a bit and she slept over my house about 5 days out of the week. What makes it so hard is that there was not to much wrong with or relationship. I almost wish that there was as that would help me put some closure to all of this. I am still very deeply in love with this girl and i am afraid of losing her forever. I have been giving her what she needs right now which is space and time, I havent tried to call her once eccept for the intial few days when i was freaking out. I know that she needs this time to figure out what she really needs and am respecting that. We broke up once before about 3 years ago and then got back together after about 4 months or so. It is kind of the same situation now but it is a little harder seeing that we have grown together so much more. There are just a few things that puzzle me and have me thinking a little more than maybe i should be. About 3 days before we broke up, we had a talk. I am going to Florence for the new year and i really didnt want to go because i wanted to be with her for new years. She told me quote " We have been together to long for you to miss out on that trip. It is only one day out of our lives" she also went on to tell me that she wanted to go away for a week in march for her spring break. THen she made me promise her that because i was going to be gone that i would spend christmas at her house this year and she was very adiment about it. I just dont know what this is all about. One week after we broke up we went to a concert togther and then she took me out to dinner and we hung out all night. At the end of the night she grabbed my hand looked me in the eyes and told me that she really had a good time, then she said that nothing is certain and that we really didnt know what was going to happen, and that she hasnt counted anything out. She want to see hang out after her exams are over which is in about 2 weeks but i dont really know why she wants to. I think that hanging out may set me back and i am scared of being hurt all over again and again. Dont get me wrong i would love to see her face and give her a huge hug but then i will have to leave againg and feel badly all over. I just dont know if it is worth it all i know is that i never want to quite on her if there is a chance of us working out our differences. I know that this is very long but if you have made it this far please help with some advice on a good rout to take. I would love to here from a women on this matter but men a good to here from too. Thanks so much

Sincerly J.D

[lovelostlady]

it definitely seems like shes interested in working things out. maybe she was just stuck in a rut. it happens. its amazing the things that stress can do to a mind. it sounds like she still loves you and cares about you. all you can do is give her space for now. let her finish her exams and clear her mind. hopefully, things will work out. I'm sorry you're going through this.

[Yorkrose23]

I am going through something very similar right now.

I think she just needs some time to herself. Maybe she felt as though you two were losing your individual identities. Time apart is not always a bad thing, sometimes it can make the people realize why they love each other so much and bring them closer than ever.

But for now, I would respect her wishes, if you do, she will love you all the more for it. Give her space, but talk to her too. In person, make a day of just being friendly and talking about everything. Get out what is bothering you and tell her how you feel about her.

These times are never easy. Try to stay positive. Good luck.

[chai714]

Magic,

I can relate to your situation. I'm 26 and was in a 5 year relationship that ended in July (not by my choice). What do you do from here? Well, after reading what you wrote, it seems like your girl made up her mind to bail. How long this will last is anyone's guess. From here, you're probably going to implement no contact for a while, so you can get a grip on your emotions. I know how it is to be blinded by your emotions, and you're probably feeling a variety of things as well - fear, uncertainty, anxiety, depression, and about a million other things. Surround yourself with people you trust and that can help you through tough times. This will not be easy, but you'll make it through just fine . . . .

[rnorth]

She just wants space. Be good to her by giving it to her.

 

She'll be back.

[fantasia2004]

Hello there i am 25 years old and have been in a loving relationship for over 5 years. Just about a month ago my ex girlfriend broke up with me saying that she is not happy and that she really needs to be alone right now. I am very confuse about all of this.

 

Yes she is confused maybe the relationship to her was not going anywhere at the time . But yes 5 years is a long time to be together. Did you have plans to marry children? Did you take or give each other space?

 

What is really bothering her?

[magichat]

to answer. I always gave her space and time that she needed, we broke up once before about 3 years ago and i gave her all the space she needed. She is going through a very stressfull period in her life right now as she is trying to get into grad school that may have something to do with it. I just wish she didnt push me away like this. I was never a jelous person and never questioned her once. we had so much trust. It was amazing. Thanks for all your replys i love all this input.

Sincery Jameson