Interest?

[itsthethoughtthatcounts]

I am in a dilemma if my property manager likes me or not...

 

I have known him on and off for the last 3 years, have rented from him in the past and then rented through someone else and now back to him. He has always been a very professional, straight down the line sort of person without reason to suspect anything. He isnt the type to smile or joke around at all.

 

In the last 3 months i've noticed his behaviour change and i am unsure if it's interest or he's changing as a person. The place i am living in has been sold and i am moving in 6 weeks and the new owners requested to come through 3 times in a month to measure things in the place as they are making changes to the place and the agent came along with them each and every time. I am not sure if this is standard or not?

 

The second time he came, he sat down and we chatted about the place i am living in etc and he looked nervous and kept looking at his phone and kept saying "so what else is new?"

 

Last week he showed me through another place i am going to rent from him and ive noticed he's also changed the way he styles his hair and he was glancing at me a time or two but would quickly look away when i looked over at him.

 

Last night he came through again with the new owners and he was completely different, very smiley and friendly. He kept looking at me and blushing and just talking a lot. Asking how i am, how am i going packing for the move to the new place and also getting the carpets steam cleaned for me and asking if i wanted to see the place again (even though a lease is already in place). He is also joking around a lot now with me.

 

This morning i get a text from him saying that the landlord of the new place has sacked him as the property manager and i will be transfered with my lease to some new agent and he gave me details. He said he was glad i am still in the building (i live in an apartment where he deals with a lot of the real estate) and he said that he thought there was some reason behind landlord pulled the plug on him and he'd come to tell me soon and he'd catch up soon. He also said if i wanted to only sign a 6 month lease with this other agent and then he could get me back into his rental property when that's ended and if he has something for me.

 

Previously i sent him a text saying we have to catch up for a beer when i move and he responded with "ok"

today i reinforced it and said "take care, chat soon, definitely have to catch up for that drink" but its been 3 hours and no response from that...

 

Am i reading into this to much? Or is there an interest? Has my offer for a drink been enough to let me know of my interest?

[solamente]

are you sure he is single? that's my first thought. i don't think a single guy who is interested would beat around the bush so much. a married/attached man would behave like this.

 

yes, you have made it clear you are available for a 'date'. if he doesn't make the next move he isn't interested enough. don't pursue a man like that, i don't care what century it is.

 

also, it is possible there is something more going on with his being fired. he could be a creeeeeeeep and got caught. if you are going to get the story, get both sides.

[itsthethoughtthatcounts]

are you sure he is single? that's my first thought. i don't think a single guy who is interested would beat around the bush so much. a married/attached man would behave like this.

 

yes, you have made it clear you are available for a 'date'. if he doesn't make the next move he isn't interested enough. don't pursue a man like that, i don't care what century it is.

 

also, it is possible there is something more going on with his being fired. he could be a creeeeeeeep and got caught. if you are going to get the story, get both sides.

 

Thanks for your response. He is divorced from what i've heard through the grapevine. My friend is friends with his brother...so the information is likely correct. Whether he might be starting to see someone and isn't serious yet well that's entirely different.

[solamente]

well, it helps that you have a somewhat close connection to find out something about him. that's good. could be he's just shy, or gun shy. wait it out, time will tell.

[itsthethoughtthatcounts]

well, it helps that you have a somewhat close connection to find out something about him. that's good. could be he's just shy, or gun shy. wait it out, time will tell.

 

He doesn't come accross as shy when it comes to work at all but maybe personal relationships are different. I just thought it odd that he said he was happy to still have me in the building and was keen to move me back to one of his properties should one become available. Maybe that's not because of personal interest but because i am a good tenant?

 

Should i just not do or say anything now?

[solamente]

i think since you already brought up the offer of a drink twice that you have done plenty to get the ball rolling.

 

your last text didn't seem like it needed an immediate response. "take care, chat soon, definitely have to catch up for that drink" isn't something that he would necessarily respond to right away as it sounds like you were 'signing off' for the time being. since you were the last one to communicate, and you were quite forward enough, i would leave it for now.

[itsthethoughtthatcounts]

i think since you already brought up the offer of a drink twice that you have done plenty to get the ball rolling.

 

your last text didn't seem like it needed an immediate response. "take care, chat soon, definitely have to catch up for that drink" isn't something that he would necessarily respond to right away as it sounds like you were 'signing off' for the time being. since you were the last one to communicate, and you were quite forward enough, i would leave it for now.

 

The first time he responded to the drink with "ok" i wonder when i move should i initiate a text asking him when he is free to catch up? I did specifically mention to catch up after i had moved which is a few weeks away....for now i wont be saying anything.

[solamente]

lol. i can tell you really, really, really, really want to text him. just DON'T DO IT!!!

[itsthethoughtthatcounts]

lol. i can tell you really, really, really, really want to text him. just DON'T DO IT!!!

 

I will try not to

[offplanet]

No, leave it up to him or it'll turn him off, I think. He seems to have stopped showing those signs of having a crush on you since you mentioned the drink twice.

[SooSad33]

I really think you should keep this professional ONLY. Like at a workplace.. do NOT look to get involved with a boss or co worker.. can only cause a real uproar or trouble.

I dont think it was such a good idea to mention you two going out for drinks? that's leading him on.

Are YOU even sure you're wanting to do this.. go this far with him?

 

I'd think on it all a bit more..

[Wonderstruck]

I don't mean to burst your bubble, but to be honest, I don't think that he's showing a lot of signs of being interested in you. I don't think that he ever was.

 

I think that you're very interested in HIM, and you were reading way too much into every little thing that he said and did to convince yourself that he liked you too.

 

I could be wrong, but I just don't see a guy who's actually interested in a girl responding with a simple "Ok" to a text about grabbing a drink sometime. That sounds so unenthused, and almost uninterested. Not even a smiley face or an exclamation point to show that he's interested or excited. And the fact that he didn't even respond to your second text about grabbing drinks? Definitely not the behaviour of someone who's into you.

 

Again, I could be wrong, but I think that your best bet is to back off for now and leave the ball completely in his court. You've more than indicated your interest, so if he's interested in you, he'll make the next move. If he doesn't, then I think that you should try to forget about him and move on.

[mhowe]

I think he was being friendly because he knew he was gonna get sacked, and he wants to line you up as a customer.

Notice he has already mentioned only signing a 6 month lease.

Just sayin'.

[greta96]

I can't pick up on any signal that he's interested in you romantically (sorry). He may have gotten friendlier because over time he got to know you a bit and is feeling more comfortable around you, but all the other "signs" that you think you are seeing look like wishful thinking on your part... It reminds me of something my friend did - she mistook a coworker of hers staring at her constantly for romantic interest, acted on it, and she managed to freak the guy out, lol.

 

Plus, even if he was too shy to ask you out, you already gave him quite the opportunity! Any man who is interested would have gladly gone for it, but his answer was polite, with no follow up.

 

I really think you should leave him be. You've already done enough, now the ball is in his court - if he's interested, he will ask you out. But don't be running after him, you'll only make things awkward between you two.

[itsthethoughtthatcounts]

UPDATE:

I had to text him as my lease is now due to run out and i have to arrange final rent payment, handing back keys etc and he didnt respond to a few of my messages and i text him again today and said "Are you ok?" and he replied with "Yes, just a bit busy any reason you ask" and then asked how i was going with moving etc...

 

What does this mean?

[greta96]

That he really is not interested.

He didn't care to answer all of your texts and saw nothing wrong with that, which is why he was surprised when you asked him if he was ok. As far as he's concerned, everything is fine because the tiny details you're trying to grasp at don't even register for him.