have you felt this?

[felicitousMe]

I woke up last Thursday April 04, 2013 feeling light and no more pain missing him.

 

I tried so hard to feel it again by reading his email , going through pictures but I can't seem to recreate the pain of missing him. A week before that though , I was still crying everyday , woke up in the morning thinking about him, going to bed in the evening thinking about him but now I don't have those feelings anymore.

 

 

I'm being weird because I still want to feel that pain. I felt that if I do I still have a little bit of connection with him and when he do comes back I would still have that feeling wanting to make it work.

 

Aaaahhh I'm not sure what this is about wanting to be in pain while I was hoping to get past it just a couple of weeks ago.

 

It was a good relationship and couldn't say anything bad about him. He treated me so well and we have a wonderful open communication. It ended when I asked him why we aren't spending more time being in 1.5 yrs together he then spilled it out saying "I don't think we are a marriage material couple even if we have a great relationship". I was bawling but I have to walk away and went NC, after a month I texted and wished him happy birthday. He replied saying he wants to send me gifts since my bday is coming up too. I told not to send any as I don't want to be reminded of him, maybe he can send when feelings is not as raw at that time , maybe a couples of months later. He insist but then I told him we moved somewhere. He even said smething like "It isn't about me returning stuff , it is about me mending fences and if you refused that attempt look at yourself in the mirror". Up to this day I didn't know what he meant but I didn't bother to ask him either I just thought if it's something important to him then I know he will make it known.

 

Btw it is LDR 2.5/3 hrs drive and we get to see each other at least every 2 weeks , we do talk almost everyday over the phone and sometimes send emails if we are not too busy at work. He is 45 and me 38.

[DonDraper32]

How long has it been since your breakup?

[kz91]

Not missing him is surely a good thing? I wish I didn't miss my ex.

[felicitousMe]

Almost 2 months now I think, I broke NC last March 20 just to greet him happy birthday, that was after a month of NC.

 

 

How long has it been since your breakup?

[felicitousMe]

kz, I'm not sure if it's a good thing at least in my case. He is super great guy and wanted to get back with him of course (before.. but now I don't know lol) but with this feeling of not missing/thinking of him with pain, I felt I lost all the connection I have with him. If I do see him I probably end up saying "who are you?" lol

 

aaaah I'm being weird.

 

 

 

 

Not missing him is surely a good thing? I wish I didn't miss my ex.