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Emotional breakdown, feeling really tempted to contact the ex


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So, since me and the ex broke up about four months ago my life has pretty much spiralled out of control. I quit my job, lost a lot of weight (I was already VERY skinny) and am now just starting to feel a bit healthy again.

I am however still unemployed, have not payed my rent in a month, and am overall doing very crappy financially.

 

I got a slight panic attack and broke down in tears about 5 minutes ago, and got the overwhelming urge to try and see my ex. He was always my rock. The one that I could break down in front of. The one that would (literally) pick me up off the floor. I have been in NC for over a month now. So could it be good to contact him? I feel like I can't think at this point

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Who started the break up was it him or was it you? If you can avoid contacting him at all costs I would suggest doing so try to find some other friends you can really lean on and be your emotional support system. I don't know why you or your ex broke up but it just really all depends on that if he said give him some space then I would suggest doing that and leave him be if he wants to come back around he will and if you broke up with him then just go ahead and call him! If you also have family you can go back to a sister brother parents etc please do so and get your life back on track because those are the people you can count on the most. These are all little bumps on the road of life and it will be only short term but finding people you can rely on will help you get through things. Try to be strong, try to find a new job, try and get healthy again and hopefully soon your life will get back together.

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Sweetie I think you need to contact your parents or some of your close friends and have them come over to support you in your hour of need. It must be very scary being in such a situation. Heartbroken with the additional financial stress & burdens is not good. My heart goes out to you. I'm not sure about your situation and if you're still on good terms with your ex. Would you be able to accept his support without wanting more? I ask that because if he acts differently towards you than when you were in a relationship it might add further to your pain than help it. Look after yourself

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Thanks guys. A little background, we were together for almost four years (anniversary would have been January 10th). He broke up with me, got the whole 'don't want a relationship right now' and 'it's not you, it's me' speech too. A week later he was dating someone else...Had a bit of time to think things through, and he is simply no longer the guy I used to know. I feel a little better after posting this though..

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Okay, I checked through some of your previous posts... is this the guy that you were friends with for years and then you had sex and it threw your relationship off course?

 

Also, it appears like you have some neglect issues from your family. Is that right? Can you talk to any of them about this?

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Sweetie I think you need to contact your parents or some of your close friends and have them come over to support you in your hour of need. It must be very scary being in such a situation. Heartbroken with the additional financial stress & burdens is not good. My heart goes out to you. I'm not sure about your situation and if you're still on good terms with your ex. Would you be able to accept his support without wanting more? I ask that because if he acts differently towards you than when you were in a relationship it might add further to your pain than help it. Look after yourself

 

Thank you for your kind words We are no longer on speaking terms after he tried to be 'friends' with me. He seems to be a bit annoyed at me for going NC, so reaching out to him would do me no good.

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Okay, I checked through some of your previous posts... is this the guy that you were friends with for years and then you had sex and it threw your relationship off course?

 

Also, it appears like you have some neglect issues from your family. Is that right? Can you talk to any of them about this?

 

Nope, the stuff with this friend happened after my breakup..And yes I have neglect issues with my parents. My mother has been living abroad for three years and my father contacts me about once a month, I have a pretty formal, non-feelings-y relationship with him. I have older sisters that I can talk to about this, I'll be hearing from them tomorrow on my birthday..

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Is it possible for you to ask for some financial assistance from your sisters? If they knew how dire your situation was then they should help you. I would never let my sisters go without if it were within my means to help them. I know your immediate concern is your financial situation so if its possible seek the help you need from govt agencies, family etc until you find a job. I wish you the best of luck!

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