A personal struggle

[Mix Maxster]

Hey everyone,

 

For a while now I've been just helping others with their situations and helping them to get better by offering advice and help, but it would seem now I am the one who needs some cheering up and needs to vent.

 

Well I've had quite the opportunity to figure myself out and life in general. I was dating my now ex for quite some time until I found out she lost her love for me and was beginning to think about dumping me for another guy she was developing feelings for. That was 7 months ago now, but that's only leading up to where i am now.

 

Anyways like I was saying, I had the opportunity to just go over things in my life and with me in general and I can honestly say that so much has happened up until now. I look at myself in the miror and I sometimes think to myself that it isn't me. I feel the need to change within, but I'm still trapped inside a world that's been planned out for me.

 

I feel like it wouldn't matter if I was fat, skinny or lean, rich, poor or average that if I'm not myself, it wouldn't make a difference. That even if I had the best body, best looks and was one of the most wealthy men in the world that none of it would matter if I didn't have the personality to back it up. I almost feel like even if I had all those things, the guy with bigger balls and a better attitude working at a grocery store would have better luck than me.

 

Now I know that's not a very happy attitude or approach, but I sometimes still think I finish last in everything. Eventhough I'm a great guy it would still seem I'm alone most days. Like this weekend, I haven't really seen anyone (much like every weekend) and I sometimes feel like I'm just a filler. The guy my friends use when no one else is around to do things with or when it helps them out.

 

I'm really just venting here as a means to maybe have hope that I'm not the only one who feels this way. I often wonder about life in general and what it's all about and what doing things mean in the end. I dunno maybe I'm just upset today because I feel the affects of not having someone anymore and I'm once again reminded of that loneliness I once felt.

 

Max

[enotjcalone]

Like you, and probably most people, I often wonder what this life is really about too. It's a strange existence alright.

 

Anyway you've got to change the way you see yourself. A bad self image is such a horrible thing. Why don't you find things to do to empower yourself. Like maybe go and accomplish something that you know you'd feel very proud if you succeeded in. In my case whenever I learned something new or achieved something it makes me feel sooo much better about myself. So I suggest you go achieve this, achieve that, go achieve everything! You'll feel so empowered! Well at least for me.

 

Don't be inactive in your life. Lethargy just gives you all the time in the world to focus on all that doom and gloom. Get up and go out do something new by yourself then if you haven't got anyone to hang with. Don't be reliant on others to provide you company, go out and find your own fun. (just kidding about the picture)

[Alabama]

I've felt the same way. There were many times in my life that I just felt like people talked to me at times, because I was filler when their other friends weren't. Yet, I've realized now in life that I have friends who truly care about me, and that I can be myself. Sometimes, in life you have to find the strenght within. I know you can do it, and your friends can help. good luck!