i couldn't imagine being with another.

[littleworld]

So here goes, my ex fiance brokeup with me, but a few words before he left were "you never know what may happen in the future... we may get back together... but I can't promise anything"

He probably said this to mess with my mind... as he did this rather alot. But at the same time I feel I couldn't kiss another man as it would feel to me like I was cheating on him as I'm still very much In love with him. During the last 4months of our relationship we rarely had sex as I never felt like it.. was this a sign of depression?

Anyway, I haven't had a crazy sex drive like ever... but now it's all I can think about!! But like I said... I feel like right now even if I flirted with another man I'd be cheating... a breakup has never messed with me as much as this. I guess it's because I am hoping onedoneday he will ask for me back.. even though I shouldnt ever think about that as towards the last few months I was with him he treated me like crap. Help..

[Kazuya]

When I got dumped from a 8 year relationship in these 2 years I stupidly proved to her that I loved her by waiting for her while she knew it; but she got knocked up and marry another loser while telling me that she loves me truly after 8 years, and that we will be together eventually.

 

Having experiencing garbage like this, I suggest you not to read much into words that he said, but the actions that he has done.

[annie24]

Having experiencing garbage like this, I suggest you not to read much into words that he said, but the actions that he has done.

 

Agreed. Saying things like, "we might get back together in the future" - to me that's like saying, "you never know - space aliens may invade the planet in the future" or "you never know, I might be married to Brad Pitt 5 years from now!" Sure, ANYTHING is possible!!

 

if he's breaking up, best to treat it as permanent and move on. i am so sorry.

[DN]

During the last 4months of our relationship we rarely had sex as I never felt like it..

Did he cite this as one of the reasons for dumping you?

[havoc]

I'm feeling exactly the same way right now, 5 months out of the relationship. I guess this is a side effect of being a truly committed type of person?

 

I figure that I'm going to have to just try to get out there and see what it feels like, if it feels good then great, if it doesn't then oh well we're not ready yet. I feel that guilt too, but at this point I know I no longer owe her anything, I gave it my all in the relationship and then once more to see where she was at after the breakup.

[littleworld]

No. He wasn't very interested in me at all. He'd rather watch porn by himself then haveshavesex. This ruined my confidence.

[lowkeystatus]

No. He wasn't very interested in me at all. He'd rather watch porn by himself then haveshavesex. This ruined my confidence.

Sounds like a jerk.

 

You're still in love with him now, but you can fall out of love with him. Time and constantly telling yourself it is over. I'm going through this right now, so I know it isn't easy.

[Mariana345]

Oh darling, I know how you feel... At the first months of my BU I was telling myself that he will come back so I should just wait. Then I didn't know if he was going back but still refused to make a bond with someone else. But after some more time I realized that I needed to do something for me, and obligated myself to "date" a little. The first time I kissed someone else I felt like I was cheating and felt awful, but I continued and had sex with this guy. It was really weird but somehow it make me feel like freeing myself, like I could continue. I enjoyed it but since that day I'm not doing it anymore. It was just to free myself, and now that I am free I want to actually fall in love to have all of that.

 

Before I couldn't imagine being with other either, but now I can not imagine being with "him" again. I don't know what you need to do to release yourself from him, but just find it and do it, even if doesn't feel right in the moment (but won't do anything harmful to yourself, set limits). Fake it until you make it?