Have you ever felt like you'll never meet a good person again?

[TopFive]

Have any of you developed a heart of stone during your healing? Do you feel like you'll never be happy again with someone from the opposite sex? Do you feel like you'll never be able to trust another man or woman again?

 

I must say that life has gotten better. I'm a month in a half from leaving this raggedy school for good and I have been having fun lately. I'm ready to go back to Jersey and start my life, but i still have some issues. First, I've gone back to my old ways of being anti-relationship. Second, I feel like no woman can add to my happiness. Third, I think i've developed some trust issues. Lastly, I really believe that I'm turning into a bit of a misogynist.

 

Now I love women and I adore the good women in my life, but i feel like the chicks in my age group aren't worth a quarter. They're all the same to me. I have a bitter taste in my mouth that wont go away. I feel really bad because i'm not the type to screw chicks over and dog em out, but it seems as though young women want those type of guys. I just really hope that one day i meet a girl who is cute, respectful, good in bed, and appreciates having a good guy in her life.

 

I wish i could just not think about things like this all the time. My life would be that much better.

[Jake_hope]

You healed, you matured and you haven't started to go out and meet the people that you like to see.

 

Don't worry about it, worry about yourself for now, you still got some work to do before you are ready to date again. You'll know one day when you are ready because you start to open up and let your guard down for that special someone.

[HeatherB]

No, I never felt that way. I wondered if I'd ever meet a great man again, which made me feel so lonely I couldn't stand how much it hurt, but I never hardened my heart. When you harden your heart, it can't guide you or let you feel joy anymore, harming you most of all.

 

It's a fake toughness that can't protect you anyway, it's too brittle. When you talk about it, it just sounds like a sad story about neediness. Like you're begging the person in front of you to make up for it and fix you.

[Pleasedonot5]

Most of us have felt like this in one way or another. In fact, at the beginning of this summer I thought that I had ****** up and let the most perfect girl slip from my arms, that it would take me forever to get over her, and that I'd never find anyone like her ever again... When in fact I realized that she had characteristics that I just didn't like, I got over her in about 2 months due to fighting through the pain and making the most out of my life, and I found someone else whom I had great interest in. Now, her and I are back together, but I realized through the pain that I am able to find others out there who I would consider optimal for a relationship. So don't worry, someone awesome always comes along in time -- just be patient and continue to work on yourself. Maybe go out more and meet new people... try not to be anti-relationship or a misogynist -- be open -- but realize it's normal to be fearful of characteristics in women that might lead to more heartbreak. What you're going through, basically, is normal, but don't let it close your mind or your heart to every potential woman out ther.

 

Stay strong man, and best of luck to you,

Pleasedonot5

[electricorchid]

I'm a woman, and yes, I have felt that way. After my ex actually, a disrespectful, no good, male who used me.

However, from what I've learned, not everyone is that way. I know it's hard sometimes, but open your heart, and give people

a chance to show you.

 

One day you'll find someone who's different and will show you how to love again if you keep believing so.

 

I learned this when I met my current boyfriend, who showed me there are respectful and loving men out there.

[Loveandlost]

dude you can't give up on the game. there are 6 billion people on the planet, more then half of them are women and most of them are good people.

[C_Unknown2005]

T5:

 

Crap like this takes time. Enjoy your freedom, if you have a positive attitude good things will come your way if you allow it.

 

C

[JoJoStar26]

It took two years to get over my past love.

Even though i feel as if i completely got over her.

I still have a resentment and bitterness towards women because of her.

I just don't see any good in the world and see every woman to be just like her.

[Reflective82]

i feel like this yes- anti men, think they are all pigs.

[Avila]

I remember the first couple of months after my break up, i became very anti- men. Very. Not loudly. I just hated being around men because a 'man' had driven over my heart with a monster truck over and over and over again without any provocation. Also every male in my life had been less than wonderful anyway.

 

Then it wore off and I'm fine. But still suspicious.

 

The thing about people is you see what you choose to see. If you think all women/men are bad than that's ultimately what you're going to get. If you're a shiny beacon of kindness and hope... eventually you'll going to run into someone who think's you're just fantastic and is kind of like that too.

 

And to the original poster... change around the gender and that's exactly how I used to feel and still do to some extent. but i know i'm a good person, so good men are bound to be out there too. Sometimes misogyny/misandry is really just a manifestation of our frustration with not being able to make a meaningful connection with someone who appreciates us. it's easy to fall into that trap.

 

i have had zero male role models in my life. crummy men really. i thought my ex was the only decent one i'd met and then he hurt me worse than any of them. but i'm not going to write off my whole age group (which is incidentally yours.) because that's just an easy way to repel people and guard ourselves from hurt. it's understandable but eventually we have to see it for what it is and move past it.

[quirky]

I don't feel that I'll never meet a good person again. I am just not sure I'll meet my match..if that makes sense.

 

Heartbreaks are difficult to overcome. We expose so much of ourselves, the brave ones expose all of themselves, we share our dreams, thoughts, bodies..it's normal to feel jaded. I find myself looking at red flags and it is exhausting.

 

But the more you focus on your authentic self, the things that warm your heart and give you confidence the more the chances to meet a person that corresponds to these qualities. 1 1/2 month out is not a long time, I believe your heart will open up again in time.