How to Proceed

[trock]

So I am wondering what the best way is to proceed. My girlfriend has said she wants a break, that she can't handle any kind of committment right now. It has hurt me deeply. But she has said she would like to try again in the fall (she is going away for the summer, she is graduating college in a few weeks). I would too. But i lost my head and said something i regret during our conversation. it was spoken out of hurt and confusion. i should have held my tongue but it slipped out before I could stop it. I apologized, and then the next day sent an e-mail apologizing. I would like to try again with her... i'm afraid i hurt her though. and that is the last thing i wanted to do. i do love her very much. how do i proceed?

[Pengui6668]

Mind if i ask what you said? I said some pretty bad things to my ex (called her a dumb slut, bitch, whore, etc).. I didn't mean them and i apologized and she got over it.. people say things they don't mean in fights, it' just how we are.. next time think about EVERY single word you say.. that way you won't say something dumb.. I don't see what the problem is here though... if she wants space and time give it to her, you're better off... She obviously wants to do something without you and she's going to do it whether you like it or not, may as well give her your blessing so there are no ahrd feelings... this also gives you a chance to do things you've been wanting to... turn it into a positive experience

[trock]

yeah she asked me if i understood and i said, yah i understand you wanna *beep* other guys. she said "i thought you would know me better than that by now." i feel terrible about it. but i apologized. i'm just afraid it will change the way she feels about wanting to try again. and i am concerned about having done the right thing.

[killer_bimbo]

You prolly shouldn't have said what you did, but I don't think it was that bad, so I wouldn't have thought it as a problem if you've apologised. I know from experience when somebody goes on about commitment, the first thing that comes to mind is they want to go with other people, and know now it's not always the case, that sometimes people just want to be able to do their own thing and not have to explain to a partner why their doing something rather than spending time with them. As for what to do, I guess all you can do is do your best to try to have fun and stuff while you are apart. Do be aware that it's not going to be apart until autumn then everything back to normal straight away. You'll both learn new things about yourselves whilst having time away, and your both likely to have feelings fade slightly in the time apart, and will probably be unwilling to give up some new things that you've found you like. Me and my ex girlfriend are taking the first tentative steps at getting back together after splitting up for 4 months with no contact, for the same reasons, and it's a weird feeling, first finding out if the emotional, close friendship bond is still there, then finding out if the physical, comforting bonds are still there, then finding out if the sexual things are still there, it's like starting a new relationship with someone new, but also feeling like nothing has changed from the best times together. If things work out for you two, you'll probably find your relationship will be better than before (if you two were together long term, a certain amount of complacency usually creeps in), and if things don't work out, things are prolly not meant to be

[Sorrowful Tears]

Just be greatful that she has said that she wants to give it another try in the future... I wish my ex would say that... its hard now but at least you know that you will most likely get another chance at some point.