Is this a good idea?

[roxy79]

I've posted before. Ex broke up with me in July. Still had contact because of a "birthday date" we had planned. After date, NC for 4 weeks...then he called. We "saw" each other at random times for the following two weeks. (He invited me over to share some news with him, he helped me with my truck, invited me over to "hang" out). I thought these were signs he wanted to get back together. Then I didn't hear from him for a week. I called HIM. He called back saying he's been really sick and he didn't want me to think I was ignoring him. (thats a good thing, right?)

 

So he and I were suppose to attend a concert this Friday night (a birthday gift from me back in July) but he can't go do to work/coaching conflicts. So here's my question: I wanted to leave a copy the bands new cd (which came out today) in his truck with a note that says: "I hope you're feeling better. Here's a copy of their new cd to cheer you up. Just make sure you play the CD Friday night so you can pretend you are at the show!"

 

Is this over doing it? Will this scare him away? It seems like he and I are doing the "friend" thing pretty well. I would do it for any friend if I knew I was going see them and if I knew they were going to miss seeing their fav band due to work. I don't expect anything in return other than to know that I "cheered" him up a bit.

 

Should I do it?

[roxy79]

Uh..what is "overdoing" it in the note?? Right now, I'm at about 4 sentences. Plus a P.S. to tell him where the CD is. (so 5)

[iceesnowbubble]

sounds like a good idea... he can take it however he wants... just make sure there isnt anything overly outthere that he may take in the wrong way..have some one else reread the note or post it on here so we can make sure its up to par... haha.. jk..well, actually..it might be a good idea to have someone on here take a look at it.. so let us know!

[roxy79]

Here's my note!

 

"Being sick sucks. Maybe a new CD might cheer you up? Check the back of your truck. If you already have it-- this can be your back up copy. Just make sure you play it Friday night so you can pretend you're at the show!"

 

Good or no?

[iceesnowbubble]

it's very good..nothing that can be taken wrong..yet it still shows that you care as a friend..goodjob! =)

[EatZ]

... I thought these were signs he wanted to get back together...

 

I can tell that it's on your mind a lot, so I don't think you should fool yourself into thinking that you're doing this CD thing for any other reason other than because you love him and want him back. If you do decide to do it, make sure you're ready for the myriad of different reactions you might get from it. I fear for your feelings more than anything else!

 

Note that I'm not saying "don't do it" at all! I think that by doing this, at least you can't say you haven't tried to be mature and thoughtful through all of this. These are tough times, and there's no wrong or right actions. As long as you can look back and be proud of how you handled it, then you've done well.

 

Let us know how it goes!

[roxy79]

I know by doing this I may not get anything out of it. I'm well aware of that. I gave him his birthday gift with the same mindset and I didn't get squat from it. He didn't call for 4 weeks. If he and I are going to do this "friend" thing, I'm going to treat him like I would any other friend. right?

 

At this point, I feel the CD might bring a smile to his face since he isn't able to go to the show. If anything, he's getting a cd from someone who's thinking of him and hopes he is well.

 

Nothing more. Nothing less. Of course I would drop dead on the floor if he called to say thank you, but I'm not holding my breath.

[Scout]

I don't think I'd give a present to someone after they cancelled plans with me that had been made some time back. But that's just me. I'm a little crankier than others about stuff like that, I guess.

 

 

[roxy79]

He didn't "just" cancel. He accepted the tickets at the time of his birthday, but that was 2 1/2 months ago. Plans change. Things come up. I knew it was going to be hard to coordinate since I bought the tickets in June, his birthday was in July, show is in September.

 

I'm not "hurt" that he's not going. I'm actually glad that he told me he couldn't go (he told me a few weeks ago) cause I was able to find some other people to go with me.

 

I have no bad feelings towards my ex. We broke up on good terms. Of course, I'd love to be "with him", but that's not what he wants. I can't force anything. I just thought the cd would cheer him up or at least make him smile.

[Jabe]

If you got them that long ago, could he not of booked that day off or cleared his schedule? Anyway, I still think it's a great idea! It would definitely sheer me up.

 

If you don't mind may I ask a question from you guys?

 

Me and my ex are still friends and things are looking pon the better side to getting back together. We saw a movie a lil while ago and it's coming out on DVD soon. We saw it before I asked her out but I still think of it as our "first date". She's seen it multiple times at theatre and I know she loves the movie. I would really like to buy her this because she's been saying how she's gonna buy it and it would really make her happy. Do you think she might take this as me trying to buy her back? Since there isn't really a special occasion? Could it be I just want to see her smile?! Maybe it woudl remind her of the great times we've had together?!

 

What are your thoughts?

 

Thanks alot!

[roxy79]

No he couldn't "clear" his schedule because he is a coach. He didn't know he's teams schedule until 2 weeks ago, which is when he said he wouldn't be able to make it due to a tournament. so...???

 

Sorry jabe I am of no help with your question. I asking the same thing you are.

[Jabe]

Oh alright then, that's understandable. Sorry.

 

No worries about not being able to help, lol.

 

Let's just hope someone else can

[nicholascrack]

I think thats a very nice, friendly gesture, Roxy.

 

 

 

Very sweet thing to do.