not sure what to do, if it's severe enough

[thehardestpart]

here i go. i have met a dude back in june. we dated for a month. after i realized i wasn't that much into him, i didn't see a future and was still not over my ex. i told him straight up that it was over, that he doesn't get me and i don't wish to keep in touch. he has been trying to contact me since. i used to get back to him once in a while, but in september i have stopped because otherwise there would've been no other way to get rid of him. in the short relationship that we had, he would NEVER listen to me, he would only go about how he felt. he would always find a way around every topic, he could never accept my choices and my decisions about the relationship.

just recently he has started calling me again. this time around he left me a very mean voice message, slandering my character and trying to manipulate me into keeping in touch with him which i simply do not want to. not that i want to be a * * * * * about it, i told him i wish him the best but that's it, it's over done with. he told me i'm messed up in the head because it's not normal to cut off contact that way and it's not normal for someone to not want to keep in touch. and in the end he said this conversation is not over yet and that we'll continue to talk next time. there's nothing else that has to be said, do not call me. enough is enough. i'm actually scared at how manipulative and persistent he is being. i don't understand why he won't leave it and me alone.

i am now confused if i'm the one who is wrong in this ? what should i do now ? i've never been in this situation.

[Capricorn3]

He sounds like a potential stalker. You have two choices: If it gets out of hand, report him to the authorities, OR change your contact numbers/email address etc.

[DoGGYtREAts]

At this stage, i think hes was just wayy into you and is acting out (albiet in the wrong way).

 

Do not entertain any of his attempts at contact at this point and if he does attempt to escilate things such as trying to come to your home, place of work, go through others to get messages to you etc. i would inform your friends you want none of it and notify th authorities if you feel concerned he may go further.

[Flyingpiglet]

Do not answer any attempts at contact from him.

If he calls, ignore it

If he leaves a message, ignore it but do not delete it

If he texts ignore it but do not delete it

 

If it escalates, take your phone with all his voice mails and text mesages and report him for harassment!

 

 

It's definate stalker behaviour... Do not allow him to start quesoning your awn sanity. You have every right to decided who you do and don't want to comunicate with!

[thehardestpart]

thanks for the support, ladies

 

he messaged me something completely delusional the next morning, i ignored it obviously. haven't heard from him since, so we'll see how long that will last. most likely, i'll end up changing my phone number if this persists.

[kath]

he told me i'm messed up in the head because it's not normal to cut off contact that way and it's not normal for someone to not want to keep in touch.

 

That's indeed just manipulation. It is perfectly normal for not wanting to keep in pouch. You're the one who gets to decide whether or not you want to keep in touch, not him. I realize it might hurt him when you broke it off, but a normal adult should be able to deal with that, and not start to harass and stalk you. He clearly does not care about your rights, your opinions and doesn't respect your decision. Good thing that you broke it off so soon!

 

I agree with everyone else. Do not contact him and do not reply to any of his messages, but save them in case you need them to show the police that he's been stalking you against your wish. Good luck!