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3 months since break up..starting to see the light!


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Been exactly 3 month today since my bf and I broke it off. Wow. Time really does fly by. The first month was absolutely horrible. The break up was inevitable..we wanted different things in life and we were not making each other as happy as we both could and deserved to be. The relationship was far from perfect, but he was my best friend for 3 years and I do miss very much. I think about him often..only now it doesn't bring me to tears. Just wanted to tell those who are fresh into a breakup that it really does get better with time. I read it over and over again in all the posts on this forum just wishing the time away so I wouldn’t hurt that badly anymore. I cried everyday multiple times a day for weeks. I couldn’t wait to get to my car at the end of the day so I could just breakdown and cry it out. I knew time would heal me..but time seemed to be standing still. Then today I glanced at the calendar and realized it's been exactly 3 months since the breakup and I couldn’t believe it. We went NC immediately after breaking it off because we thought it would be best for both of us to heal. Several weeks ago we exchanged a few friendly and very brief emails and that was it..NC since then. I was sad for the rest of the day after emailing with him because I missed him..more so his friendship than the relationship because time allowed me to see that we were not right for each other. He is a great guy and a caring person and I know he will make someone very happy..we were two people who fell in love..shared some really amazing memories but a romantic relationship was not in the cards for us. I know in the grand scheme of things that 3 months is still very early in this healing process and I'm sure my emotions will be on a wonderful rollercoaster ride for many more months to come..but I am learning to embrace it. I learned a lot about myself and also what I am looking for in my next relationship.

 

My advice for those fresh into a breakup.. keep your head up and embrace all the ups and downs because there will be plenty of them. Surround yourself with family and close friends..but give yourself some 'you' time to cry the ugly cry and get it all out. You'll go crazy if you don’t! I wish you all the best and thank you all for posting and sharing your stories!

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give yourself some 'you' time to cry the ugly cry and get it all out. You'll go crazy if you don’t!

 

This is so true.

 

Let the tears flow. Release the pain through your tears. You'll feel relatively calm and serene after every cry. Your mind will momentarily clear so that you can consciously fill it up with loving and grateful thoughts that lift you up and carry you forward -- until the next time you need to cry, of course. Then you let the tears flow again. And each time you let them flow there are fewer tears. And in each gratitude-filled aftermath you travel even further.

 

DD

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I'm right there with ya. I'm 3 months post BU and I am feeling so much better and like my heart and soul are finally "free" from being emotionally trapped. I went through a breakup similar to what you described, it was inevitable as we weren't really happy or going anywhere. I'm feeling so good now like I really made the right decision to end the relationship. I don't think I'm ready to get involved with someone else or even really date right now and I'm okay with that. Single is feeling good

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