we fought about a stupid thing and he broke up with me

[kutekat100]

My boyfriend and I have been dating for six months and it has been amazing. we had one small fight over his ex and thats it. He always tells me how happy he is and how amazing we are and how he loves me so much. This week it was our six month anniversary. we have been fighting all week. he cancelled dinner on me on tuesday and i got really cross with him, i'm not sure why. and then he said i never decide what we should do and where we should go and he always decides and then feels like i'm just being dragged along. so i suggested this weekend that we go to carnival but he said he didn't like that idea so we fell out big time again. anyway friday comes round and he takes me out for what i think is dinner but it turns out he has boked a hotel! and he buys champagne and gives me roses. and we have a great night out at his mates birthday and then go back to the hotel. that night he promised we would spend saturday together and go to the cinema. wake up saturday, leave the hotel and he says he wants to go and see his friend and am i okay to get home by myself. we both feel ill and are hungover. i'm really cross because he says he doesn't remember saying we'd go the cinema or spend day together,. But its our anniversary and he just tells me to go home. is that a bit weird? so we have a fight in the street and he makes me cry. i storm off. he follows me and says we should break up. i say why? and he says because all week he doesn't think he's been making me happy and now he's made me cry and he doesn't want to do that. so we break up. tonight i get a message saying he doesn't want to break up and he loves me but maybe we have been seeing too much of each other. yet yesterday he was saying how amazing i was and last week he said he wanted to spend all his time with me. a couple of times i have said to him i;m not happy with my life or that we'll probably break up after xmas just so i protect my own heart really and dont look like i rely too much on him. he says this has hurt him. but what has happened to make things change like this? what shall i do? It our first fight and i feel its ruined things and he feels differently. can i make it up to him?

[kauaiangirl83]

I totally understand where you're coming from. My bf and ur bf have some similarities. I guess what I can tell you is that if he really loves you, he'll come back. Things won't be all peachy right away, but if he comes back, you need to make it clear that you don't like it when he just breaks up with you for no reason. Maybe you should take a break and do the things that you would do when you weren't in a relationship like spend time with your friends, watch chick flick movies, read a good book. I've been in your situation before and sometimes you need to give your guy his space... Hope this helps!

[OceanEyes]

There's a good chance that he's probably just feeling like no matter what he does for you, that it's not good enough, because you keep getting angry with him for something. I can understand your frustration though, since it was your anniversary and you probably expected to do something, but in his eyes, you're taking for granted that he rented a hotel room and did other nice things for you. He's probably thinking, "I rented a hotel room and bought flowers and champagne, planned out a whole thing for our anniversary and she still isn't happy!!".

 

I've been through similar experiences with my boyfriend. The thing with guys (I've noticed anyway), is that they absolutely hate feeling like the bad guy all the time. So by this I mean that if you're always finding faults in the way he behaves with you, and not giving him enough credit for the positives, he's going to eventually feel like he's not cutting it and is a terrible boyfriend. He obviously cares about you, and doesn't want to feel like he's hurting you all the time.

 

If you love him and want things to work out, my advice to you is this: give him more credit for the things he does for you, rather than point out and emphasize on the bad things. In all honesty, if my boyfriend rented us a hotel room, bought me flowers and champagne, I would feel pretty spoiled and special.

 

Basically what I'm saying, is that your boyfriend sounds like a pretty good guy, and is very thoughtful and considerate in the things he does for you. That's not something you'll find in every guy out there, so try to give him more credit for doing things to make you happy. If he forgets something or does something to upset you, try dealing with it in a less blaming and confrontational manner, because there's a good chance that he feels like you're attacking him (even if that's not how you mean it). If he forgets a date, for example, let him know, but don't make a huge deal out of it and make him feel terrible.

 

Your boyfriend does love you, I know this for a fact by the way you've described his manner towards you. He's not going to stay with someone who he feels he is always hurting though, so either decide whether or not you're over-reacting and not giving enough credit, or if you really don't like the way he is with you.

[catgirl82]

i think my boyfriend and i went through what you guys are going through. we had this totally blissful relationship where everything was perfect for a few months. and then, the honeymoon ended and the fighting began. once you realize the faults in the relationship and in the other person, its very easy to get angry and upset and resentful and look for all of the bad things. this is what happened to me. i think you and your boyfriend are taking eachother for granted. sit down and have a long, serious talk about what you want, and try your very best to remember why you guys started the relationship in the first place. its good to be analytical about things, but dont over analyze every action. appreciate him and make sure he knows it. start treating eachother with respect again. its easier than it sounds, take it from my experience!! good luck