What am I Doing wrong? Need help from Girls' Persepective

[Bones28]

Im a 23 m and am dicovering that I suck at having sex. First of all, I do not even know if my gf has cum, because I don't even know how to tell that, which prob. means no she has not. Also, it seems like I can't last very long and am always ejaculating too early. Im not even sure what I am asking, but I would also like to know if 1) anything i can do to last longer.... 2) how to tell when she cums 3) does she know when i come and when i do can i still keep going? Forgive me for my innocense, i am not very sexually active. thanks for all of your help!

[lilsht05]

I don't think that there is anything that you can do to make it last longer, I could be wrong. If she cums...you will know, watch her body movements her facial expresions, listen to her. You'll know when it happens. Most women do not cum through sex alone. Try orally getting her to cum. eat until you can't anymore . When you cum, she can most likely feel it, I know that I can, but everyone is different. ask her! Talk to her about it, I'm sure she will be more that willing to let you in on her thoughts. Ask her if you are satisfying her and what you could do to make it better! That should help a lot! communication is the key!!

[goddess23]

hey. well im a virgin, but somehow know alot about sex lol. first of all about your questions, its very normal to feel like this. relax, if you love eachother, then you're not going to be BAD. what makes you good is not necessarily how long you can last. if you know that with intercourse you dont last long, focus on foreplay FOR HER before getting into it. give her oral, finger her, and even prep her for those. that way she can be satisfied from that. about her cumming, no theres no way to really tell, most girls do cum, but its such a small amount, its impossible to tell unless your in the middle of oral or something. but just look at her facial expressions and such, that will give you an even better answer. about continuing after you ejaculate, you can, probably not intercourse, but you could still pleasure her in other ways, however, when you cum, you usually will not reallly want to. so thats why its best if you pleasure her first, lots of foreplay.

[PAdreamer]

Hun, here is what it comes down to. If you are having sex with a woman, you should be able to talk to her about it, right? She will appreciate your circumstances, and will probably give you some great pointers as far as what she likes. Talk while you're having sex. Some people think it feels weird, but it's better to talk and make sure that you both know what is happening and what your partner likes than to go the whole time guessing and worrying about it. Eventually you will have such a clear sense of what she likes that you won't have to ask anymore.

 

There are actually a few things that you can do to last longer. Often it takes longer as you become more active and time passes. But if you want more immediate results, I suggest that you look into Kegel exercises. You can look them up online.

 

If you physically have the energy to keep going once you've finished, go for it! A lot of men don't keep going because they get worn out. But if you can keep it up, more power to you!

[ClareMsUK]

Hey, a tip is to masterbate before having sex or that day at least, then u should last longer. also at point where u know u are on the way to orgasm pull out or change position and start again, keep doing this and then the orgasm wil be even better! as for her orgasm the best way is to rub her clit, this can be done during sex if u are behind her (very good position) u should be able to tell from her expression and noises if she has orgasm, but ask her to tell u what she likes and stuff, be vocal it adds to the enjoyment! enjoy x

[lisaria]

It sounds to me like you're awfully worried about whether or not you guys cum, that's not what it's all about. Have fun for God's sake. It's not a contest. Figure out what she likes and DO IT!!!!!! Figure out what you like and DO IT!!!!! Stop worrying about whether you cum too soon. If you do then use something else. Usually a woman needs stiumulation that's other than penetration. Do you know how to please her with your hand or your mouth? Learn what pleases her. It's the biggest turn on when you're pleasing the person you're with.

Quit worrying! If you care about each other, make it a game. And Laugh!!!! Just enjoy being together and remember that this is a time when you can be as close to a person as it is physically possible to be. What does she like? Don't feel like you've GOT to have perfect sex. That takes time. Learn each other. Believe me, if you can laugh and play at sex you're ahead of the game.

[Mun]

Hi there,

I can understand how frustrating this is for you. I have some tips.

 

You should practice masturbating to the point of orgasm and then stop or slow down. Do this several times ( for a few weeks but much better if it is for a month or longer--however long you need to ) without letting yourself ejaculate. Just keep going to the edge, but don't jump off( ). It seems to help a man last longer and to control his orgasm. You can also ask her to help you. She can do this with you but remember not to go over the edge. The more you practice stopping yourself--the better you will get at controlling your body.

 

There is another tecnique you can do during sex, but I will pm you with that.

 

Best of luck

[June4life]

1.) Masturbate a couple hours before you have sex. It will definitely make you last longer.

 

2.) The muscles inside her vagina will begin to contract, and tighten around your penis, then release. Tighten, then release. Also, you should me able to tell just from her movements, and noises!!

 

3.) She will probably know when you cum, if you aren't using a condom she might be able to feel the warmth of your semen entering her vagina. If you are using a condom, then she will once again be able to feel the warmth of it contained in the condom. Use a condom. Also, if you are using a condom, once you come, I would pull out and remove the condom. If you don't, the semen in the condom make leak out the bottom, and it may also cause the condom to break. Just pull out, remove the condom, and put a new one on. If you're asking on a medical level, it is okay if you want to continue, however after ejaculating, you will most likely go limp in a few minutes! It wont do any physical harm either. If you are worried about finishing before she does, buy a dildo that's the same size as you, and after you're finished, use that on her.

[s4t4n]

First of all, I do not even know if my gf has cum, because I don't even know how to tell that, which prob. means no she has not... 2) how to tell when she cums

 

You can test for orgasm. When a woman is in the middle of an orgasm, her vagina contracts and expands. Just put your finger a little inside her and you'll be able to feel the contractions. For more look at link removed

 

Also, it seems like I can't last very long and am always ejaculating too early. Im not even sure what I am asking, but I would also like to know if 1) anything i can do to last longer

 

Yes, there's a few techniques. Muneca is right, masturbate to the point of orgasm but don't go over the edge, keep practicing this. The point just before orgasm is called pregasm - its like a signal telling you orgasm is about to happen. Stop when you get this signal, rest, then start again. This way you learn to recognize pregasm and learn not to go over the edge.

Another technique is relaxing your PC muscle (the muscle between your scrotum and anus). If you keep this relaxed all the way through sex you will last longer. Read in more detail at link removed

[donn71]

I am 33 and have been married 14 years. It is not easy to make it last longer. The longer I go without the shorter its going to be. My advice: Dont let it fester in your mind it can really get you down. Listen to any advice that the females tell you about talking to your girl about it. Naming off the players on sports teams really can help. Or something similar. I have found that over the years you get into ruts where you cant break out. Keep it interesting as much as your girl will let you. Good luck

[somanaomi]

ok, to last longer masturbate before having sex. or let her give you a handjob and cum before having sex. when she cums, she'll moan or scream in pleasure. and when you've cum, just stop.

[lonely1]

Best thing is to talk with her during the intercourse. you could also use start stop technique to stay hard for a long while. some positions also help in early orgasms for females you could try those. oral and hand is the best to make women cum....

best of luck dude

[JoyieGracie]

Get her more arroused then you, by doing some foreplay for a while. You should know if she had an orgasm when she make a sudden movement of some sort, light tightening and releasing her body.Moaning is also a possible sign, but sometimes unreliable becuase they can fake it You should figure it out. And I'm sure she knows when you went.

[69_king]

1)I guess you can pull out and switch to giving her oral for a minute and then go back to intercourse. Also, I guess masturbating just before would work. Once I tried masturbating twice in a row and the second time took forever but the orgasm wasn't as good.

 

2)A sudden intake of breath, arching of the back, tightening of the muscles, and some sound effects to go along. You can tell if she's faking the sound effects.

 

3)see 1 above. you can probably do it twice in a row if you wait maybe 10-15 minutes in between.

 

 

Now I have a question. If you want to make sure a girl cums when you are having intercourse do you need to rub her clit? its not that easy from some positions.

[ZebTmoney]

I had sex once and i tried alot of stuff. But i would say im nefo so i went a little crazy but if you cum you can keep on going. In about a hour and 35 min she cummed twice and in 13 sec i went off but that i didnt' stop me i just started fingering her and changed condoms i didn't go soft or anything but when i stuck it back in it felt totaly different becasue i just cumed a sec ago but after a min you will get over it. damn does it feel strange, feels good and bad at the same time. I think i have a quick cuming prob to. I cummed 5 times but i spent about 20 minuted fingering her then eating her out. You can really tell when a girl cums if you have your dick in her all those rough skins egdes will tighting right around your dick and if you don't have your dick in her you should be able to tell by just watching her back arch and her tingle.

[petal17]

iv heard that doing the 9 times tables can take ur mind off of coming!! try that! as for the 'how do u know if she has come of not?' well if she is anything like me then she will let u know by moaning and maybe even screaming a lil bit ( i know it wa graphic lol) also, dont forget that its hard to give us girls orgasms without stimulating the clitoris. hope it helps you!

[69_king]

doing the 9 times table wouldn't work for me, I've got a math degree, I'd have to try solving differential equations or something, oh cr@p! there goes my geek alarm, ok, switching back to cool mode. 8) Yeah, so, like I'd rather be concentrating on the experience, you know? just be real slow and smooth for while