Is it JEALOUSY or just me?

[TwiLiteSkii]

Me and my ex-boyfriend had a 6 months break. We went separate ways is dur to a serious issue I had with him. I couldn't stand him for what he did over an online game, which he got too addicted and lost track of everything else including me!!

 

I was so depressed those days. I happened to have this really close friend helped me pull it though all those heartaches. I know he had tried his hardest to help me get through those bad times. He always there to comfort me whenever I start thinking about my ex then break down and cry. He heard me cry over my ex for numerous times.

 

Then we started going out. He confessed to me and said he has been liking me for one year but I was with my ex-bf before. I have to say that he is an excellent guy. He cares about me 10 times more than my ex-boyfriend would ever did. He is almost like a perfect boyfriend. But somehow my heart still belongs to my ex-bf who treated me like crap.

 

I recently got back with my ex-boyfriend and it's obvious that I broke up with the other guy. He didn't get mad at me at all. He said he wants me to be happy and he'll respect my decision as long as my ex-boyfriend will treasure me again and promise not to treat me like how he did before.

 

thereforeeee, we became friends again. We still talk to each other and stuffs. But my boyfriend has found out and got mad at us. My bf knows I went out with him when we were on the break and he hates him so much now. My bf wants me to stop talking to him and he doesn't want him to be in his or my life ever again. So it's clear that if I stay with my boyfriend I have to lose a great friend that cares about me a lot. My boyfriend kind of hinted that if I don't, he'll dump me because I'm not making him happy. What should I do in a situation like this? I really don't want to give up a great/caring friend. Why can't my bf trust me?

[5555]

Your ex-bf sounds like a loser. Your friend sounds like the nicest person you'll ever meet. I had the same problem one time, and I went for my ex. I lost a really good friend and my ex still dumped me about 1 month or 2 afterwards. I think you should go for your friend because it's ovious that your bf dosn't trust you and your friend really cares for you.

[OceanEyes]

On the one hand, he's being unreasonable in asking you to cut this guy out of your life. But on the other, you did choose to let the past be the past and to continue together. I can see why he's jealous, given that the new guy and you probably slept together.

 

Have you seen a lot of positive changes in your boyfriend? I find that if there's something that is really negative about someone, it generally doesn't change over night, but is masked and replaced with good behaviour until he feels comfortable again. People who've been broken up with because of a character or behavioural issue will sometimes do their best to suppress it, but it doesn't mean it's gone for good. Gambling addictions are pretty serious business too.

 

Make sure that you haven't made a mistake getting back together with this guy. It's been my experience that when someone puts something like gambling, drugs, or other addictive substances before you and your relationship, that it is a recurring thing and you should be very careful.

[Just A Teen]

Unless your current boyfriend decides to change 100% then i doubt you should dump your friend... I Agree with 5555 your best friend sounds like a wonderful guy that you should stay with.....HAvn't you ever heard that like your best friends would always make the best partners or something like that....well i believe in it! if you guys get together so well....Take some time away from your current boyfriend and just think about how he treats you like crap and how your best friend treats you like you wanted to be treated...for a guy to tell you its okay to break up with him as long as your happy and treated like your suppose to..... i think you would be happier with him... As in you'll be happy with him you just dont know it yet!!! well i hope i helped a little bit for you!!! GOOD LUCK!!

[TwiLiteSkii]

My boyfriend left me a voicemail 2 days ago. He said "I don't want you to talk to him. I don't want you to talk to him at all period. I hate him now. I hate him so much and I don't want him to be in my life." He sounded mad. *sobs*

[slc333]

It sounds like you don't really know what you want.

I can totally understand how your current boyfriend could be jealous. I mean think about it. It sounds to me like you are trying to have your cake and eat it too.

 

This kind of situation is always tough on any relationship. You say you want to be with your current boyfriend, but then you find the need to keep this other ex fully in the picture. Sometimes it's best to just move on.

 

Or maybe try to take a break from both of them for awhile to figure out who you really want to be with. In the end, your wishy washiness could mess up things with both of them if you're not careful.

 

I mean seriously. Why would you want to put yourself in the path of temptation on a regular basis with your ex if you think you're really serious about your current boyfriend? If you know your ex is not the one, do yourself and him a favor and make a clean break. Otherwise, he'll continue waiting around for you hoping. So if there is no chance for him, don't be cruel. Make it easy for him to move on. And yourself.

 

I don't think you can really give your current/future relationship a true shot if you're constantly reminding yourself of the past with your ex. In the end, it doesn't sound like you're ready to devote yourself fully to one person. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing. Maybe just give yourself a break. Make some time for you to think about what you really do want.

[DeStRuCtIvE_HeArT]

It sounds to me like you are trying to have your cake and eat it too.

I personally don't think she's trying to have her cake and eat it...I jus think she's confused.

 

i feel....u shouldn't talk to ur friend (who likes u). while ur trying to re-connect ur relationship with ur boyfriend. You could hurt both parties. Your sooper nice friend could be hurt...obviously u kno how he feels about u. and u could hurt ur boyfriend IF he's trying to change his ways for u. I feel if ur feeling upset/confused at the fact that u have to "choose" on "who to keep"...(which sounds like it to me)...you shouldn't be with either one. Keep ur distance. I think it's better. so u can have a clearer view of mind on who YOU think is/will be the best for you. You can't ask us wat we think or look for answers thru us....you're gonna have to look within ur heart and make up that decision for yourself. And by doing that...it means...taking a break away from the both. In the end...you can decide...if u wanna keep ur friend (which i think u should)...you'll build a more healthier relationship...or if u wanna stay with ur boyfriend (if he changed for u). Remember...even if ur boyfriend says he'll change....u need to give him that space to let him change. They can make like they've changed in the beginning...then later..back to their own self...and thas the sort of thing YOU don't want. sooo...think about it...take a break and pamper ur self instead of worrying. This kind of worrying can be very unhealthy for you. you don't really need it.