people500 Posted June 3, 2011 Share Posted June 3, 2011 Hey guys, I have a couple of questions. So I've moved out of my parents house, and am renting a room now. It's kind of cool cause now I can have more freedom. I've been wanting to try and find a boyfriend since I'm turning 20, and have never experienced any of it. So I know the best way to find people is going to clubs, but I'm not into that. So the second thing I thought of is to try a dating site. So the best one I found is called okcupid. It's pretty nice. It's free, and you can have a profile of yourself, and what you like to do, and all that. Do you guys know of any other free dating sites that you can recommend? It would be nice to have other options. The other problem I have is, people don't respond back to me sometimes. Maybe I ask to many questions. For example. There is this guy who's on there that contacted me. He was really nice and I thought he was straight, so I told him that I wouldn't come onto him or anything. Then he wrote "U seem cool to and yay. I'm bi pretty much so I wouldn't mind u coming on to me " Then he said "Yeah we should def chill( When I suggested hanging out. Then I asked him if he could tell me a little about himself, what's it's like to be bi, and what's his schedule like. Then he never responded. Do I ask to many questions? I just want to get to know the people. Can you guys give me some tips on what to say? I don't want this to keep happening. Link to comment
lukeb Posted June 3, 2011 Share Posted June 3, 2011 I'm not a big fan of online dating sites, but like they say a bad plan is better than no plan. I would start by asking what you are exactly looking for. Are you looking for a boyfriend, or a hook up?. When you write "I'm bi pretty much so I wouldn't mind u coming on to me.", it doesn't look like to me you are looking for a boyfriend, but rather just interested in a hook up. I would get the impression you're just looking to goof off, flirt, and perhaps use the chat to get off, but probably not looking for anything substantial. I would say it doesn't matter too much what dating site you use, a face picture, and a picture with you with clothes on sends a a different message than just a body shot, or underwear or nude if that is allowed. So what message do you want to send? When you do get a hit, keep your sex chats to am minimum, agree to meet somewhere at a coffee shop or something. Link to comment
Messiah Posted June 3, 2011 Share Posted June 3, 2011 Well a big majority of guy's intentions on those websites is to use it to make easy hook ups. Seriously, some will put in the least effort possible. That's prob what the dude in question was out for, so when you started asking questions, he was just not interested. If you're looking for a serious boyfriend make a really in depth profile to express yourself, that always increases the chances you'll get people talking to you. Also, often do that questionnaire quiz thing that assesses your compatability to others, and mostly talk with the people you are most compatible with. Another free site is link removed which seems a lot lower class, so I'd only go there if you were looking for hook ups. Link to comment
people500 Posted June 3, 2011 Author Share Posted June 3, 2011 @lukeb lol, that was the other guy who wrote the two quotes, not me. Oh no I'm not looking for hookups or any of that, trust me. I'm looking for a long term relationship. I guess I should of added that. @Messiah I think this site is more of an actual dating site. I did put pretty a in depth profile, I even wrote that I'm not into the drugs, drinking, the party scene... So people can see that I'm a good guy by looking at my page. Also near the bottom you put what your looking for, so I put long term relationships and even friendships. I do do the tests, which are pretty cool! But yeah I'm sure there's a lot of people who want sex on there. I just don't know how else to meet other gay guys since I work full-time and don't go to school. Link to comment
mdog Posted June 3, 2011 Share Posted June 3, 2011 I agree with Lukeb..put on your profile..you are searching for a boyfriend or tell the person you are talking to that you are looking for something serious. Even me..I go on a hook up site (just b/c the men I have met through the site are the ones im more attracted to and you would be surprised by all the nice guys who ARE looking for a relationship..even on a hook up site) and i was looking at a guy's profile and it said "looking for friends with benefits and a boyfriend." When i saw that I immediately stopped talking to him..and he was upset apparently..and really wants to be my boyfriend and he immediately deleted his profile. We still talk, but i still have that feeling that he would not mind just hooking up with whoever..if we were to date. Another dating site i would recommend...is link removed...But yes I would be upfront on what YOU want, even if the guy is really good looking to you..In the end, it is what you want.. Link to comment
IcecreamLove Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 I think it also might be a bit of OkCupid. Me and a lot of my friends, use that site too and a lot of people flake on replies or randomly stop talking to you, or just never reply to your messages at all. It is a cute and fun site but the selection of people there, is not all that "long term relationship" material. But do not give up hope There are tons of free dating sites out there though, and like lukeb said even the straight up hooking up sites have decent people lurking around on them. For another dating site suggestion though; I had better results on PlentyofFish. Link to comment
BiCurious2011 Posted June 10, 2011 Share Posted June 10, 2011 Well I'm just going to talk about 2 sites that aren't already listed here, but both are gay sites. You sound like you're looking for a girlfriend, and might even say you're straight, but you contacted a bi guy? Or he contacted you? I'm confused...are you acctually looking for a long-term boyfriend? Can you be with a guy without needing a girl? I could...and so that's what I'm looking for. (Not that I'm not still looking for a girlfriend, but girls tend to be more difficult and I've never had a very successful relationship with one...) Anyway, here's the 2 gay sites I go to. One of them is really primarily for hook-ups but you CAN say you're looking for a relationship and not sex and as long as the other person is looking for only sex they'll probably leave you alone. It's called [link removed[/url] There's no women there, only men. This is also a good website if you're looking for people in your area, as it's really easy to search for people that just live near you and it will tell you everyone online that lives near you. It's also a VERY active site (because it's used for hookups) so you'll find plenty of people to talk to... The other site I go to is called [link removed[/url] but it's really only for black people or people who are into black people. I'm white, but I have an account on there because I like black guys. There aren't many people in my area on there though (because I live in a rather white area) so I don't go there as much...there's also women on that site, but they're not looking for boyfriends. They're looking just to chat with gay black guys, basically. Oh...and "bgc" stands for "black gay chat"...so yeah. Another thing you need to consider when dating online is do you want to date someone who lives close to you or long-distance? Or does it matter? If you're into long-distance relationships...you're more than welcome to send me a message. You seem like the type of guy I'd be interested in. *shrug* Best of luck to you. Have fun with the dating sites. Link to comment
JoeCool Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 Maybe it's my bad luck but I've never found anyone with substance on those websites. I'd say 90% of everyone are just looking for hookups. Even when I stated that I was looking for friends and a potential relationship, I still got hit on by men claiming they just wanted friends but as soon as we met, they were trying to sleep with me and once I told them I wasn't interested, they vanished. It was just too much of a hassle trying to weed out the bad ones... Are there any more websites out there??? Link to comment
BiCurious2011 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 I wish I knew of some, Joe. I really do. Adam4Adam is the best I have, even if I do have to weed out the bad ones. Link to comment
BiCurious2011 Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 By the way, people500, I sent you a private message. Link to comment
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