Jondwnr Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I was just wondering, cause what i hear is that when your ex starts comparing the two guys/girls this means they are having doubts basically in their new relationship. Am I correct? Is there more to this? I just recently heard this from my ex In regards to maturity and getting in trouble "he isn't like you, I have to worry about him" I just put 2 and 2 together now and I am a curious cat right now Link to comment
michelle21689 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 When I first dated my ex he kept comparing me to his ex but it was more of a notice like I was better lol. It was annoying but it stopped after a while... I think it's normal to compare who your with to an ex because of familiarity and the newness of a person. I'm seeing someone I like and I can't help but notice the differences between my ex and him because they're very different people. I guess it's different in your case. I'm not sure Link to comment
Jondwnr Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 Yeah there might of been a few other times where she compared the two of us guys(I don't remember the exact situations) but i seem to be on the positive end of it all... Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I was just wondering, cause what i hear is that when your ex starts comparing the two guys/girls this means they are having doubts basically in their new relationship. Am I correct? Is there more to this? I just recently heard this from my ex In regards to maturity and getting in trouble "he isn't like you, I have to worry about him" I just put 2 and 2 together now and I am a curious cat right now why is she still "worried" about him?? aren't they broken up???? a few casual references to an ex, i can handle. but if it's something that keeps coming up, i would wonder if he/she is truly over them. Link to comment
Jondwnr Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 I'm actually her ex and she was comparing him to me a couple times(in my favor) And she is still with him, but they are having loads of problems and they have only been together 2 months. Also since you mentioned getting over me(her ex) what are your thoughts on her extreme flirting with me and then Afterwards staring deeply into my eyes for a good 2 minutes while following my every move and then I say"what" and she just smiles. I've gotten a few opinions on this and most of the people say either "she wants to kiss you" or "shes not over you and is thinking about you" But the funny part a day before this flirting I kissed her and she pulled away. she also said she doesn't want to be with me right now(prolly cause she's in love with her rebound) Link to comment
Slimpee Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I would NOT be happy if my ex compared me to a new bf. Why?: -It means that i'm talking to her despite her having a new bf. I guess this doesn't matter if the breakup is old news and both parties have moved completely on but you're posting in a "Get Back Together" forum... -She is trying to toy with my emotions -I don't want to hear about her new bf -I have too much pride to let her play w/ my like that Seriously, she doesn't want you back...she has a bf!!! Link to comment
endy Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I would NOT be happy if my ex compared me to a new bf. Why?: -It means that i'm talking to her despite her having a new bf. I guess this doesn't matter if the breakup is old news and both parties have moved completely on but you're posting in a "Get Back Together" forum... -She is trying to toy with my emotions -I don't want to hear about her new bf -I have too much pride to let her play w/ my like that Seriously, she doesn't want you back...she has a bf!!! So she's going to break up with her boyfriend and run back into your arms. Congrats if that's what you want. You really want someone who probably just slept with another dude a week ago? You are her second choice right now, she's not putting you first. She's still in the other relationship. Link to comment
Slimpee Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 So she's going to break up with her boyfriend and run back into your arms. Congrats if that's what you want. You really want someone who probably just slept with another dude a week ago? You are her second choice right now, she's not putting you first. She's still in the other relationship. I'd be livid and I certainly wouldn't talk to her anymore. F that... I want to be in contact w/ my ex but if i found out she's seeing someone I would never let that happen Link to comment
Talk2much Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 One of my ex's kept referring me to her Ex, how much better I was than him at everything - you know what. A while down the line she ran back to him didn't last long. We sorted things out but never really did get back together - hence why I'm here haha. Link to comment
Jondwnr Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 Well the reason why I was even in contact with her was because it was her bday and I surprised her with a midnight call then the next day she said her gramps is dying and I told her and her family inwould be there for them(I'm close with them) I stayed at her house for 6 days...and nothing but drama with her and him. Right now Im trying this nonchalance thing I think it can pull her true feelings out but most importantly change my life drastically(once I master it) Link to comment
thagator Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 This is an interesting question. It's very normal for a gf/bf to compare you to their ex, even if they don't say it and only think it. To be honest, I don't think it normally means anything. However, if it was really excessive I think it could show that he/she isn't completely over their ex as they're still always on their mind. Link to comment
Talk2much Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 This is an interesting question. It's very normal for a gf/bf to compare you to their ex, even if they don't say it and only think it. To be honest, I don't think it normally means anything. However, if it was really excessive I think it could show that he/she isn't completely over their ex as they're still always on their mind. How would you know they think it, if they never say it? Or you a physic Link to comment
thagator Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 How would you know they think it, if they never say it? Or you a physic Haha I just know it happens, at the beginning of my last relationship I compared my ex to my ex ex but never verbally expressed it to her as I thought that would be rude. I know she did it to bc her friends told me that she liked me much better as a bf than her previous one, though she never said anything verbally. Link to comment
Talk2much Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Haha I just know it happens, at the beginning of my last relationship I compared my ex to my ex ex but never verbally expressed it to her as I thought that would be rude. I know she did it to bc her friends told me that she liked me much better as a bf than her previous one, though she never said anything verbally. I know what you mean man, well I suppose when an Ex compares you to there current spouse then it could mean a majority of things. If you was quite a catch then it probably is a brilliant thing, if you a jerk then no it's a bad thing. This is going to sound quite big headed but if my Ex compared me to any new spouse she got in the future then it would only be a good thing. Because when it comes to looking after someone I care about I'm good at it - some would say to nice. That's my back fall in every relationship being Mr. Nice. Link to comment
thagator Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I know what you mean man, well I suppose when an Ex compares you to there current spouse then it could mean a majority of things. If you was quite a catch then it probably is a brilliant thing, if you a jerk then no it's a bad thing. This is going to sound quite big headed but if my Ex compared me to any new spouse she got in the future then it would only be a good thing. Because when it comes to looking after someone I care about I'm good at it - some would say to nice. That's my back fall in every relationship being Mr. Nice. Blah I'm the same way. There's nothing wrong with being nice but now I look back in embarrassment as I should have been more assertive. I was so nice that I apologized for stuff I really wasn't sorry for and sometimes took the blame for things that were HER fault. If I could go back in time I would stand up for myself and speak mind. Oh well, I'm only 21, lots of girls to apply what I learned to. Link to comment
Talk2much Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Blah I'm the same way. There's nothing wrong with being nice but now I look back in embarrassment as I should have been more assertive. I was so nice that I apologized for stuff I really wasn't sorry for and sometimes took the blame for things that were HER fault. If I could go back in time I would stand up for myself and speak mind. Oh well, I'm only 21, lots of girls to apply what I learned to. Exactly the same type of people, but I tell you what. Ask yourself this you have probably been in the same sort of situation before? You was Mr. Nice then they finished it you moved on...they still try and carry on contacting you? I bet you have had ex partners do the same well to long after the break up. I know I have had past experiences when Ex's were to late. Everything in life is a lesson and don't change for no one Link to comment
Jondwnr Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 Yeah I was nice as well and I'm 21 lol but I acted like an ass sometimes to keep the relationship fresh, but she knows I'm a catch..., but I'm not perfect if you have read my posts Link to comment
thagator Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Exactly the same type of people, but I tell you what. Ask yourself this you have probably been in the same sort of situation before? You was Mr. Nice then they finished it you moved on...they still try and carry on contacting you? I bet you have had ex partners do the same well to long after the break up. I know I have had past experiences when Ex's were to late. Everything in life is a lesson and don't change for no one I haven't really experienced that yet, this was only my second relationship but the one before her kept contacting me, but not to get back together. This one has yet to contact me after over five weeks, not that I really care anymore. I know what you're saying, I like being nice and I like helping people and getting along with everyone. I'm not goig to change, but I do have to draw the line somewhere. Link to comment
Jeffrey01 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 After my ex left me, she got into a new relationship about a month later. It lasted for a few months. When she met with me recently, she told me how much better a person I was to her in almost every respect. And she STILL didn't come back to me. So I'm not really sure what her point was in telling me that. She said something to the effect of 'I miss the relationship.. the way you treated me, but I don't necessarily miss you.' Whatever that means.... Link to comment
Jondwnr Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 Wow that's messed up Jeffrey, maybe you have to reattract her somehow? I think I might have to do the same thing cause she shows signs(and she has a rebound) Link to comment
Jeffrey01 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Jondwnr, who knows man... I tried like hell, but I've given up. It was a confusing couple of days when she reached out to me. Time for me to look forward not back. I wish you luck though man! Link to comment
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