Husband Having sex with other woman

[LONLEY]

I have been married for a year and my husband is having sex with other woman. Tells me it's just sex and not love and it's not the same thing.

It is killing me inside i am so upset. I am not well and he says that cause i am sick he doesn't feel right having sex with me. We just to have sex once a month if that. I dont know what to do I love him very much and want us to stay married i just dont get how having sex with other woman is right he was my first lover and my first marrage so i could be wrong aobut the sex and love thing. Please let me know what you would do if this was you.. Thank you very much

[CarterJonas]

I'm sorry about your situation.

 

Seeing you have only been married for about a year (or even thirty years really), I do not think that it is right that a partner starts having extra marital relationships, whatever excuse they use.

 

If you are ill at the moment then he should understand this and be of support to you; and not add to your worries.

 

Don't know if you have tried this but tell him that you won't tolerate this behaviour and he should stop immediately. Don't listen to any of his excuses; How would he feel if you started sleeping with other men? If he does not or doesn't want to stop, even though you love him, would you really still want to be with him?

 

best of luck

[OverParanoid]

If that was me i would leave him as soon as possible.

 

1) he is not considering your feelings, seems like he only cares how he feels

 

2) You being not well is no excuse for h im to be cheating on you. a real man would take his wedding vows very seriously "for better or for worse" " in sickness and in health" think about it!

 

Dont put yourself through anymore pain and hurt. And if u decide u wanna stay with this guy. then consider marriage counsling...Good Luck In Whatever u decide

[LONLEY]

I'm sorry about your situation.

 

Seeing you have only been married for about a year (or even thirty years really), I do not think that it is right that a partner starts having extra marital relationships, whatever excuse they use.

 

If you are ill at the moment then he should understand this and be of support to you; and not add to your worries.

 

Don't know if you have tried this but tell him that you won't tolerate this behaviour and he should stop immediately. Don't listen to any of his excuses; How would he feel if you started sleeping with other men? If he does not or doesn't want to stop, even though you love him, would you really still want to be with him?

 

best of luck

Thnak you very much for your kind words i really neened to hear kindness. I dont really know who i can talk to about this my family and friends and be so upset with him that i could not work it out they would have me leave him on the spot. Thank you again.

[LONLEY]

Thank you for all of your kind words i am sorry about the spelling in the other reply i didn't sleep last night and i guess it's showing. Thank you all again and god bless all of you.

[CarterJonas]

I'm glad it was of some help to you.

 

Keep posting on these boards if it helps. Alternatively I would try and confide in someone really close to you, someone you know well, be it a relative or a friend. I don't know where Bayside is, but is there a councillor close by that you could alternatively go and confide with?

 

regards

[Katheelynn]

Hmmmm....I wonder how he would react if you were t he one seeking sex from others? Perhaps, he is seeking an Open Marriage, where each are free to seek other partners for sex. I understand you have to be very very secure in your love for each other to enjoy sex for sex's sake. Have you had this discussion with him? If he is ok with you doning the same behavior as he is, then you need to really sit down and have a good think with yourself. Can you tolerate that kind of marriage? I feel your confusion, but I do feel you need to get his intentions out in the open and both of you accept the openess in your relationship.

[hmj]

I can totally understand why this would be killing you!! It would me also! In my opinion there is no excuse for him to be sleeping with other women. It seems that he is using your illness as an excuse. Respect yourself and get out of that relationship.

[hurtabandoned]

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. Using your illness like that is a very cruel thing to do. It's supposed to be " in sickness and in health." It's not your fault that you are ill, you shouldn't be punished for that. He should be helping you through this as best as he can instead of thinking about himself.

 

You can't be expected to tolerate this. If talking to him doesn't work and he still plans on continuing this behavior then you should consider leaving. If he loves you then he will stop, it's just that simple. You shouldn't have to be dealing with this right now. Reconsider talking to family or friends, you need someone who will be there for you.

[Gunther]

The phrase "in sickness and in health" comes to mind. I read only your first post and a couple after so if i am repeating old news, I'm sorry. But when your married you have agreed to have sex with ONLY one person and that is whoever you married. How would he like it if you had sex with another man because he had a cold or some pidaly excuse?