why am i the one feeling the guilt?

[ferna3069]

ok so my ex broke up with me a month ago. i did contact her the first two weeks. i contacter her about four times. and she contacted me about three. when she broke up with me she told me she needed to stand in her own two feet.she told me she wanted to work on herself. so i stoped contacting her because i did not want to make it harder. she contacted me a week later and i told her i need to get out of her life to heal. she just told me no. i told her ok then call me tomorrow. which she did not do.she called me a week later. tried getting me jelous. i got mad at the fact that she tried to get me jelous.when i tell her i need to heal and leave she would start crying or just get mad.

 

things that my ex told me to do. i told her i was going to give her things back, that had to do with her life. like her class ring. she told me hold on to it. till im ready. one of the problems i had . was that when i went was that all we ate was boxed food. she told me she started to cook every day now. she is a good cook but she did not cook when i was over there. another thing is i always liked her accent and she lost it. when i talked to her it was back.the thing that made me back off is that she told me she did not love me any more when i told her i know you still love me but what happens after this is up to you.

 

the thing i feel guilty about is im starting to look at the big picture. she said i was mean to her sometimes to her friend that told me. alot of the arguments where because of her.i know i wasnt always nice. and no im not trying to make myself look better, but there would be times that she would get mad over random things.she started to tell her mom things that i did wrong. when she never looked at her. she wants to keep me in her life so bad. i told her that i did not like the way she did everything, the way her mom got mad at me. because i did not want to be her friends. i look at the big picture and i was the one who was always there for her. her family would make fun of her body and talk about her. i would be the one who was always there for her.but i feel so bad that im looking at the big picture and look at her for the how she really is. im scared that if she comes back i might love her but not want to get back.i think about the times that she was mean and the times she was nice. she never talked and spoke her mind. she would keep everything in and explode. even if it did not have to do anything with me

[anna1029]

She sounds like she doesn't know what she wants, and she's pulling you back and forth depending on her mood. She needs to realize that she needs to make up her mind, or she can't have you. You feel guilty because you care about her, but it seems like she's the one at fault here.