accidentaly rang her after 6months NC! this is has gone so wrong!

[Leon91]

well me and my ex have been over for 6 months now after nearly 7 years together!

still hurts a little bit, but i have most of the normality of life back now.

i can eat well,sleep well and laugh again. even had sexual contact again.

and a new ( very fresh ) relationship, only together 10 weeks so far hehe!

 

and to the people who may remember me, and the situation i had with my children

that seems to finally be coming to an end, i see my 1 year old Daughter twice a week now! and am expecting another daughter in May of this year!! ( both with my ex )

 

i accidentaly dialled my ex earlier today, after hitting her name not my mothers on my phone

it rang and then said " this person is currently unable to accept calls "

which it used to say when we first broke up.. but never rang just went straight to that.

so im not sure if it rang her end or not. but it kinda undoes a lot of work

 

it was only when it said that " this person is unable....."

i realised ' thats not my mums voicemail,what the heck? *checked screen see her name*

ohh no! i have rang Ti!!!! OMG'

 

obviously now im worried shes gonna see that call and think im still waiting around for her

but we havent said a single word to each other since september.

and believe me she would have great satisfaction if she thought i was still longing for her

she loves attention and control

 

 

i know i will see her on the 24th of march for the final court hearing

which will be first contact since we split.

 

to be honest i keep thinking id like to impress her by being thin and smart looking again!

 

but more than anything i want a civil relationship with her, as parents, for the children.

i would love to be able to call up on a monday, arrange when i can pick the kids up and when she needs them home.. that simple..no fuss no " i this. or i that or we or us "

just proper, loving parents to our children!

 

also as a side note i also know this about her.

 

since splitting up.she hasnt left her house ( her parents )

all of her friends have abandoned her and think shes losing her mind now as she used to always stand them up and ignore them even when she was with me.

 

so shes pretty much a loner now and obviously that is slightly concerning for me

as i need assurance my daughter is getting the full attention at home she deserves!

 

but all in all

 

im getting there - day by day

the heartache has faded by 90%

 

just a few more hurdles hey?

[HeartGoesOn]

Since you're only 19, and have one child, and one on the way, are you financially able to support these children? I would also think twice about being in a new relationship involving sexual contact at this time.

 

I wouldn't worry about the accidental phone call, but you do need to be involved in the lives of these children that you're producing.

[PhilliesFan001]

Sorry I'm not sure I totally understand - why are you going no contact with her, if you're going to have two children together? I don't really see how that'll work. Plus if she's expecting in May, shouldn't you be involved in doc visits and stuff anyway?

[amber81]

Yes that surprised me too!! It's the best not to have contact if you have mo children ! But then how do you know about ur babies? How do you set up the visits?!! Etc etc etc I don't get it!! Are you really 19??? it doesn't add up you were together since u were 12???

[Leon91]

hi.. first off,thanks

 

.. yeah im more than secure financially to support the children

im from a wealthy family and also have my own job in I.T installations and repairs

pays enough for a house and car and bills and have enough disposable cash left for a few luxuries each month.

 

 

also, in regards to the new relationship, i dived into it stupidly, becuse to be frank i was scared what would happen if i didnt

she seemed the type to call 24/7 and threaten to end her life and stuff.

so im trying to be as close friends with her as i can and explain to her that im just not ready yet

its not her, its just females in general at the moment and i dont feel i can truly love someone until i know where i stand with my ex.

 

now... with the NC thing

 

it wasnt my choice, it was part hers/part social services

whom said that me and the ex should not contact each other or they would look into removing the child.

so she changed her number and moved back to her parents.. and that was last summer

 

i would be MORE than happy to talk as adults and parents. its only logical

seeing as we are parents for (legally) 20 years to come

we cant pretend each other never existed, it would be devastating in the long run for the children.

 

so in March, in court, i am going to try my damndest to request that i am able to speak to her as civil people.

besides. the court date on march is ending all social services involment.

as i did parenting classes, anger management, and saw my daughter under their supervision for 8 months

( off my own back, i chose to do it all, just to prove i am not any risk to them and they agreed to this in their reports so now in court it should be up to mine and her solicitors to sort the contact between both me and her and also the kids )

 

 

believe me, im not thick, this should never have had any court or social involvment at all

tia kicked and screamed until they stepped in, to try stop me seeing my daughter.

which is now finally coming to an end.

 

so as you all know, any parents should be just that - parents

 

not people who pretend they dont exist.

 

**

 

yes, we got together last year of primary school and ended september 2010

so yes, i am 19. ( 16/09/1991 )

 

and all contact was arranged between me and social services and they bring her to contact and take her home.

 

im not allowed contact with her at all so am unable to have any involvment with the pregnancy.

although if she agrees, i might be able to after march.