Former couples interactions...

[SethSLC]

Just typing this mostly as a way to get the thoughts in my head out of it and down on paper so to speak.

 

I've been broken up for nearly 4 months now. She left after 5.5 years together, being engaged for a year and a half because she felt like she didn't want to try anymore (she felt we argued too much...about every couple of months, and not enough physical attention).

 

We work together and for the first few months I was friendly as I began changing myself and using this as an opportunity to become a better person. She thought like I had become a stranger because I didn't react the way she expected. So during this time, about a month and a half ago I went through the stage of grief involving Anger and I stopped talking to her at work. This went on for about a month until she got really angry at me one day for ignoring her. Right after that day I had my usual counseling session and talked about that and realized I didn't want to ignore her, I liked being friendly and the fact that she thought I was a stranger because it meant the changes I was making were really working.

 

So I started chatting to her, smiling at her at work. At first it was slow and short, just a few words here and there. But each day they grew longer and longer until the point (after a week) where we chatted for an hour or 2 straight. Generally about nothing, just light hearted banter and a tiny bit of flirting.

 

Then we both went on vacation (separate of course) for the hollidays. The week we were both gone the conversations increased to the point of dozens of texts a day and like clockwork an hour long text conversation at night before bed. There was some more flirting and lots of humor and banter. She began to say things that puzzle me and I'm trying hard to not think about it and to continue to have NO expectations about anything.

 

I told her that the past 2 weeks have been surreal. She agreed. She told me out of the blue that I've given her a lot to think about this past week, and I said thinking is good but not while driving. She started calling me cute nicnames again at night. She began referring to my mom as "mom" again. She changed her FB profile picture (no I'm not friends but we have all the same friends and I noticed last night in a response to one of my friends posts) to a brand new picture (taken recently) of her hand wearing the engagement ring.

 

*edit* Suffice to say interactions between former couples are confusing at times

[CSLX9]

It's a shame you generalize and say women are confusing.

What this indicates to me, is that she merely had enough of your

relationship. Got out and now likes the changes and so it considering

or even wanting back with you.

[ponyboy]

She left you after 5.5 years after being engaged for a year and a half and yet you think she is confusing. I think her message was pretty clear and you are making more of this than you should. She left you, that is all that matters, all of this in between really means nothing. Shes having her cake and eating it too. Excuse my bluntness.

[SethSLC]

You're right, I shouldn't have generalized, what I meant I guess isn't so much that women are confusing as the interactions between us are confusing.

 

She probably is simply trying to have her cake and eat it too, and none of the in between really matters. That much I completely agree with which is why I put this down in writing so that it's out of my head and I can let it go and forget about it.

[CSLX9]

And how's that working for you?

[SethSLC]

And how's that working for you?

 

Working well. Haven't chatted with her in a couple days, had a great New Years Eve, went snow boarding the past 2 days. Haven't thought about her much at all really once I got all that stuff out of my head.