Going away with my ex, should i make a move or not?

[liberation]

Thanks for all the advice so far, you all have been great.

 

Recently my ex broke up with her boyfriend. They had planned a holiday this week, but since the break this didn't happen. So feeling down and having nothing to do for nine days, I recommended that weekend away would be a good idea. So we decided to book one as soon as possible

 

The room comes, with a double sofa bed and one single room. It seems apparent that two people have to share the sofa. She refuses to sleep with her friend so it looks like we will be sleeping together!! I have spoken to her about it and she said we will have to see when we get there.

we have shared beds in the past but that was when we were together. I am just worried that if this thing happens its going to tease me so much, the girl of my dreams, lying naked next to me, and i cant do anything about it!! talk about look but don't touch!!!

 

Ok, last night I took my ex and her friend to a local pub and they both got very drunk. We met a group of foreigners that worked in the local hotel, they where Swiss and very friendly and we all got chatting and had a great night. I felt extremely jealous when a guy from the group gave her his number, my blood boiled but I took a deep breath and said to myself that i needed to cope and get use to this, because one I'm only her friend and two she needs to have fun to completely get over the last idiot she went out with, and three this is nothing compared to the cattle market we are going to at the weekend!! So I shrugged it off and tried to think nothing of it. After the pub she mentioned that the guy she just met would probably just use her and she didn't want that. She's looking for someone to really love her, care for her, to bring her up when she was down etc. I wanted to say right there, right then that I could do all of those things she wanted!! But I had to bite my tongue, as only last week she asked if we were just friends. I told her that I did still care for her, but at this point in time she needed a friend and thats what is was going to be. However being drunk and chatting away after the pub, she slipped up saying that I was fit and suddenly became quite embarrassed, and changed the subject very quickly!!

 

I see her every day now after the split with her ex. She rings me, I ring her, I'm crazy about her. But I don't know if she would want to go back with me, I'm so tempted to make a move this weekend, because I cant stop the feelings I've got, they are so strong, all I can thing about is her!!! The only thing that is holding me back is the fact that she has only just split up with the love of her life. She has said that she isn't going back there, and I believe her, before she was always confused and wouldn't speak about him or the reason for the past break ups. Then a few days ago was the first time she told me everything, what he did, how he did, and how much he ****ed her head up.

 

There is so many thoughts and ideas going through my head. Should I pull a girl in front of her to spark any hidden feelings there? Wait, pull no one on holiday and just concentrate on making her laugh and flirt with her to show she is special and see if I can win her round? or just be that good old friend, sit back watch her have the fun and just be patient showing that I will always be here, and that I'm the caring, looking out for, great fun guy she really needs?

 

Please give us some advice, its driving me insane, and I am only just 3 days away from what may be the worst weekend of my life or possibly the greatest!!!!

[Finch]

Well it's obviously clear to me that you both seem to be having some minor spark of feelings for each other again. Why? Well first of all she really wants your attention and help if she's calling you, talking to you about her ex, wants you to go with her on this trip. She needs you to some degree. However, you need to make sure that she isn't just using you as some sort of rebound relationship guy.

I would say just take things easy and let nature take its course. I imagine that you'll end up making an intimate move on her and she'll either accept or push you away because she isn't ready. I wouldn't guess that she would get upset if you tried to make a move on her unless she felt betrayed that you, her friend, was trying to get intimate with her during a troublesome time she is going through.

[liberation]

After 2 years of much trouble and pain we are still friends. The trip abroad was teribble. Out of a whole week, only one of the days that we spent together was a happy one. The trip was filled with her parents splitting up, her brother fighting with everyone in sight, and a bigger gap appearing between us. I didnt speak to her for months after the trip. Six months down the line the bastard boyfirend eventually left. After many more relationships she eventually found her match and is now due to get married. It took me nearly two years to get over her comletely. The first relationship that your ex gets into is always the worst for you. No matter who the guy is you WILL ALWAYS HATE HIM!! it gets easier and easier after that. It is also a tough one for her new men to understand that she is just "still friends" with an ex. That is why i try and stay away as much as i can.

 

The moral of the story is, if your ex finds a new guy. Leave it, stay away and start again. Remaining friends with an ex and watching her live a new life with another man is just pure Torcher.

 

Dont do it, its heart renching stuff. But if you have a heart of stone that cannot be broken and you are willing to go through the pain, at the end you will have a friend that knows you and will understand you better then anyone. To be honest i wouldnt have gone through the pian that i did, and next time i will just leave it. Dont waist time on something you cannot fix. Move on, move ahead and work on things that do work. FIND SOMEONE ELSE!!!

[Yowser_76]

I would just go with it. Relax, have fun, enjoy each other's company. If something happens then great...if not, you've still had a good time.

 

Have fun and good luck