any positives about being single?

[kennyc90]

I decided that I'm finally going to really take advantage of being single and moving on from my last relationship. Some things I've been doing is focusing more on my job, and working out a lot. I plan on learning the acoustic guitar and learning how to cook. Are there any other ideas I can do enjoy myself being single? Sometimes I feel alone.. but I don't want that feeling anymore. I don't want a relationship with anyone anytime soon. I really just want to focus on myself and only me. What have you guys done to be happy about yourself? Working out is a HUGE way to make me feel happy about myself because I set goals already and I am seeing improvements in my physique. But I want to know like more things I can do. Any ideas??

[sunnyv]

Spend time with family. Go to bookstores. Run in park.

[shes2smart]

I loved traveling alone - no negotiation about where to go, when to go, what to see or what to do....just did what I felt like doing when I felt like it.

 

It's also a great time to explore a time-consuming hobby. For me, that was owning & racing Standardbreds (harness horses). I was a very hand-on kind of owner and my agreement with the horses' trainer was part of his training bill would be bartered in exchange for my help caring for the horses (cleaning stalls, feeding, etc) and assisting on race nights. Unless I was seeing someone who was into that stuff, there'd be a resentment about how much time I was spending at the track. When I was single, there was no one giving me attitude about it at all.

[Batya33]

I think you have to be a person who enjoys alone time. I did - and still do. And I agree about finding a time consuming hobby or interest where if you were in a couple it would require more negotiation/planning.

[catfeeder]

When I go on a strict diet, I commit to something difficult and before long I'm struggling and suffering. When I DON'T make that statement, I just increase exercise, eat healthy, and if bump into something rich or sweet, I'm not all that impressed or vulnerable to it.

 

Same with being single.

 

When I made a big decision to swear off men I needed ways to bolster myself against loneliness. When instead I relaxed and just stopped dating guys I didn't feel like dating, I spent more time with people I love and friends I care about, and my solo time became valuable and luxurious.

 

When I'm open and curious without living an agenda or a hunt, my world fills up. I'm not closing myself off from good men if I meet them, I'm just not frustrated by trying to find them. If I ever come accross a good companion, I trust myself to know it--but if I bump into wrong matches that are rich or sweet, I'm not all that impressed or vulnerable to them.

[kennyc90]

Spend time with family. Go to bookstores. Run in park.

I will probably go to the bookstore more often but I've just started running more. I would spend time with family but they're two thousand miles away from me... -.-

[kennyc90]

I loved traveling alone - no negotiation about where to go, when to go, what to see or what to do....just did what I felt like doing when I felt like it.

 

It's also a great time to explore a time-consuming hobby. For me, that was owning & racing Standardbreds (harness horses). I was a very hand-on kind of owner and my agreement with the horses' trainer was part of his training bill would be bartered in exchange for my help caring for the horses (cleaning stalls, feeding, etc) and assisting on race nights. Unless I was seeing someone who was into that stuff, there'd be a resentment about how much time I was spending at the track. When I was single, there was no one giving me attitude about it at all.

Dang I need to find a hobby like that.

[Stay_home]

Ohh how lucky you are..

 

Being single you get to indulge in the pleasures of not being tied down, you can talk to whomever you want to and when you want to (just don't be a jerk about it). The best thing to do is to start incorporating some hobbies into your life; occupy that mind, keep it sharp. Trust me on that. Because it's so much to do and to learn out here in the world. Don't be in a rush to change your relationship status, you will have your day.

[kennyc90]

Ohh how lucky you are..

 

Being single you get to indulge in the pleasures of not being tied down, you can talk to whomever you want to and when you want to (just don't be a jerk about it). The best thing to do is to start incorporating some hobbies into your life; occupy that mind, keep it sharp. Trust me on that. Because it's so much to do and to learn out here in the world. Don't be in a rush to change your relationship status, you will have your day.

Well I've been single for about 5 months now and I feel myself to slowly get over my old relationship. But yeah, I just want to be happy single and I never was..

[easyguy]

Time spent nourishing your body of work as a single folk will let you give on a much deeper level to a partner than if you see relationship status as a commodity.

[Mixed]

Totally agree with this. Once you take the pressure off yourself to find someone and look after yourself and your interests (and this is not being selfish!) you find you hhave the time of your life! You begin to ooze confidence and happiness because you're happy in your own skin and discovering things about yourself and life that you didn't seem to do in the relationship. It's that mindset that attracts people to you. If you're lonely, make the effort, get out with a friend, go to a new bar/restuarant, sit at a cafe or pub by yourself and read a good book! I did this, and had the time of my life. I engrossed myself in uni, caring for the home, got myself out there and tried new things; volunteer work, giving speeches to high school students about uni, gave all my love to my cat and touched base with my spirituality again. I finally wasn't afraid to be on my own. It was me and the world, and it was liberating! And I never had so many men in a short period of time noticing me. That was just a plus, because I relalised I didn't want a relationship at that point and was happy to continue on my 'journey'. Embrace all life has to offer. There's more to it that finding a partner. Best of luck!

[Stay_home]

Man, there is so much more to life than worrying about having somebody. It's a good thing too, but it's not the end of the world if ya don't.