found out ex left me for the girl he cheated on with

[bluberry]

So long story short, i found out he cheated in feb, took him back after a wk and then he just dumped me a couple of weeks ago. Found out today he's dating the person he cheated on with.

 

i feel angry and used and stupid at myself for trusting him and giving him a second chance and i just need to vent here.

 

i know he's not worth it but i still can't help feeling second rate and so betrayed.

 

anybody care to share how they moved on from this?

[savignon]

I'm sorry you're hurting. On the bright side you will probably learn to not accept cheating the first time around....consider yourself wise and more mature as a result, because some people take a cheater back several times and only when their self-esteem is in shambles do they do differently.

[Mustachio]

anybody care to share how they moved on from this?

 

Time.

 

My ex, cheated multiple times, then finally after we broke up and got back together a few times right near the end, she started seeing this guy before we broke up and finally left me for him.

 

After some time had passed, I started to realize that anyone who could so easily hurt me for their own personal gain was not really worth my time. Once I started to realize this, the thoughts of her being with someone else stopped bothering me.

 

I am still not fully over it, its hard, and I still think of her a lot, but just give it some time and you will see it start to improve dramatically.

[pumpkinmoon]

Time.

 

My ex, cheated multiple times, then finally after we broke up and got back together a few times right near the end, she started seeing this guy before we broke up and finally left me for him.

 

After some time had passed, I started to realize that anyone who could so easily hurt me for their own personal gain was not really worth my time. Once I started to realize this, the thoughts of her being with someone else stopped bothering me.

 

I am still not fully over it, its hard, and I still think of her a lot, but just give it some time and you will see it start to improve dramatically.

 

This part really stands out for me. When you realise that someone can treat you this way without a seconds consideration for your feelings, it really helps you to move on.

 

You know, being dumped once is enough for a lot of people not to take someone back, without any of the other nonsense involved like cheating and bad treatment and these people certainly have their heads screwed on the right way!

 

He's a cheater and if anything you should feel at least a little relief that you no longer have that on your mind as I am sure you did when you were with him.

[sunnyv]

I agree. You know my ex cheated on me last week. Hence why she is my ex now. It still hurts every day. But you have to listen to the wise people on here. The not knowing and the wondering was worse than the pain of the breakup. I mean I miss my ex like no other and i wish she would come runnign back saying she messed up. Thats not happening and I realize it. So I am just taking time to heal, hitting the gym and just trying to enjoy myself by myself, maybe catch up with a few friends haven't seen since I have been in the realtionship, etc. It just sucks. You are hurting my friend. Take solace in that you are not the only one hurting. Your ex will miss you trust me, he is just caught up in the moment, and most likely this will not work with his "fling". take care best of luck

[bluberry]

yea i know.. the not knowing and the mistrust when we were still together was so tiring and i was so tired and got angry so often. I don't know if that drove him into her arms. i feel like i brought them together at my expense and at the same time i don't get understand. wasn't i enough or good enough?

 

i know he's not worth my time but right now after having cried my eyes out (again) i feel so numb inside. zombie like. like i'm back to where i was 2 weeks ago.

[ladyninja30]

I agree with you all and it does hurt and take time to heal. My ex and I were together only 8 months, but even in that time I realized he was someone I had fallen in love with and wanted a future with. He hung out with my family, came with me to my sister's wedding, spent about 200 bucks on everything for my birthday and then out of nowhere (seriously nowhere, our sex life was great, we got along fine, nothing seemed out of place at all in our relationship) he cheated on me with her.

It's taken me a while but I'm in a better place than I was in June when he first cheated and left me for this girl who manipulates and controls him, she isn't remotely attractive. I found this out because he changed his relationship status on facebook within 1 week after leaving me..yep 1 week. I said to his brother..what the hell? I learned from his brother that she had already been over at the house the next day or so after I was out. I was devastated to have learned that she'd been right there for about a month while he was still seeing me. I still hurt from this everyday although it's very slowly getting better after almost a year. I don't think I will ever understand why when a man gets cheated on and he himself gets so bent about it, why then do they not realize it will hurt someone else exactly the same way?! Don't they realize that the only thing worse than being lied to is knowing you weren't worth the truth.

 

If anyone could ever answer that question..I'd love to hear the answer.

[xanax]

just think, they deserve each other....he will cheat on her, she will cheat on him, at least you aren't in a toxic relationship anymore. And most the women i know who have been cheated on were beautiful and amazing people, and their man cheated with trash,so don't feel second rate, someone did you a favor in getting that garbage out of your life.

[ladyninja30]

Your right..but I don't think he'll cheat. I think she'll get him eating out her hand and kick him to the curb as he watches her leave with some other guy. It happened to him once and it'll happen again. One day he'll learn from his mistakes and how not repeat them...he may be garbage out out my life, his actions still hurt though..one day soon I hope I wake up going what the hell was I thinking.