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Won't Let Me Do Oral On Him!!

willow7

By willow7
in Sex and Romance

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willow7 Newbie

willow7

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My Boyfriend WON'T let me do oral on him anyone have any reasons or suggestions as to why?? He gladly does it to me and is into alot of other things but not oral for him....BIT CONFUSED!! I have had 2 previous partners and they seemed to have enjoyed it. So i have the idea im not the worst at it!

 

 

 

Any advice is helpful

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willow7 Newbie

willow7

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He said he was shy....but hes far from shy cos he knows hes attractive and hes well equiped so not a valid reason according to me. I am slighty affected by this as it was one thing that really got me going when being aroused but it takes longer because he does things i like the least which i have mentioned in a non-hurtful or making him feel like rubbish way. I guess i will have to just get on with it, its not all about oral i suppose.

 

Thanks

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XxJustMexX Contributor

XxJustMexX

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I noticed with a couple people that this may be a self esteem issue... My ex husband who I mentioned in the post above didn't like to be completely naked around me, didn't want to take showers with me, have me go in the bathroom while he was in there... He just seemed really self consciuos about his body for some reason...

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IphigeniaSaysHi Enthusiast

IphigeniaSaysHi

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Just try, for your own sake, not to let it get to you too much. I know that sometimes when a partner doesn't like something, the phobia can transfer to you. If you're with another guy later on in life, you don't want to get all nervous about giving oral because of this partner when you actually like it!

 

Hopefully he will come around. hehh no pun intended.

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bluegradient Newbie

bluegradient

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Without actually knowing the guy and his personality it's hard to say but I'll give it a shot.

 

How is his behavior? Is he polite? Respectful? Gentle when touching you? You mention guys in the past who would actually push your head towards their crotch. Has this current boyfriend every done anything remotely pushy like that? When you have sex with him does he seem to be making an effort not to hurt you in anyway? Like not putting his full weight on you or anything like that?

 

What I'm steering towards is that he may actually (as unbelievable as it may seem in this "chivalry is dead" era) like and respect you so much that he feels like he's degrading you or humiliating you by making you perform oral on him. He may view it as something demeaning to a woman for whatever reason. Just the way his mind may work.

 

As an example, when I was a teenager and would get some really intense crushes on certain girls I could not have sexual fantasies about them. I just couldn't think of them that way. I would have sexual fantasies but it was with some fantasy girl who didn't exist or some celebrity that I'd have no chance of ever being with. Never the girls I had crushes on. It was as if I felt like thinking "dirty" thoughts about them was disrespectful and inappropriate.

 

You may have landed yourself a gentleman and hopeless/ful romantic. But like I said, I don't know how he behaves.

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warmpandacola Rookie

warmpandacola

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Have you tried talking with him about it, like asking him why? It is rather odd but then again I'm a girl and it took me a while to be comfortable recieving oral and even longer to be comfortable giving. I still have a weird thing about anyone watching me give a blow job. Maybe he has some phobia like that. It is a bit awkward for some people to lay there while the other person does gives. Idk. I suggest just asking him how he feels. Find out if he ever would let you try it and if there is a way to make him feel more comfortable (example: when I finally felt comfortable giving me ex blow jobs he let me cover his face with a blanket every time lol). He may never be comfortable with you giving him a blow job but that'll be something you'll have to decide whether to accept or not.

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Baily Apprentice

Baily

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As a guy I just don't understand this...not even the slightest. Especially if you are wanting to. Sounds like he's emasculated and feels that it degrades you...and in his head you will become less of a person...sounds dumb...but makes sense.

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Car Chick Contributor

Car Chick

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He may have had a bad experience with it. I had some bad ones with giving oral so I was really reluctant to do it with my bf now but he had done it for me and then wanted me to, so I thought, for him, on his birthday, since he did it for, I'll give it a shot and I really didn't mind it, almost kind of liked it. So maybe he's just scared to try it with you because of bad experience before. I imagine if someone did it too hard or something it would hurt. Maybe he's expecting that.

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NaturalJ Contributor

NaturalJ

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I don't like oral, but don't mind to do it for others.

 

I just don't feel comfortable kissing a woman after she gives me oral. Thinking about it, the last time I let a girl give me oral I felt bad. Like she was too good to lower herself to that standard. I don't hold a low standard for others that do oral, but in my sex life I feel like it is degrading for whoever I'm with.

 

I don't know. I just prefer the foreplay, chemistry, and penetration the good old way.

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