After a breakup, ever said "I'll always love you"?

[Seymore]

Something someone wrote in another thread brought this to mind...

 

What is the purpose of saying this if you're moving on? Seriously, do you think this is something one says in the heat of the moment, or has someone here said that, moved on, found someone else, gotten married and still loved that one person from before?

[asthesparrow]

When I broke up with my ex a week ago, the last thing he said after I said "Ok, bye" was "I love you... I do..." and it just made me so angry. I wanted to punch him in the face. How dare you say that, and act like you mean it, when the whole reason for this breakup is because you aren't committed, and you don't know if you love me enough??

Argh.

[His Annamchara]

When I broke up with my ex a week ago, the last thing he said after I said "Ok, bye" was "I love you... I do..." and it just made me so angry. I wanted to punch him in the face. How dare you say that, and act like you mean it, when the whole reason for this breakup is because you aren't committed, and you don't know if you love me enough??

Argh.

 

wow we must have the same ex lol almost the same exact thing happened to me a month ago

[DerektheDomino]

I will always love my ex-fiancee and forgive her for the hell she put me through with the breakup.

 

I asked her to marry me because I knew she was the one person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I already had that cemented in my heart.

 

I will always love the person for not only who they are but what they did for me as a person.

[asthesparrow]

wow we must have the same ex lol almost the same exact thing happened to me a month ago

 

Haha. Stupid isn't it? It doesn't make any sense to say that!

[His Annamchara]

Haha. Stupid isn't it? It doesn't make any sense to say that!

 

no and it hurts to think that all that we had is lost. Ugghh they need to grow up and make up their minds and if they aren't committed they shouldn't get into a relationship where a girl wants commitment.

[nasdaq]

I've heard this too. "my feelings for you will never change, I'll do everything in my power to make sure we are together again, I love you." Yeah, and a month later he's with a new girl.

[Seymore]

I've heard this too. "my feelings for you will never change, I'll do everything in my power to make sure we are together again, I love you." Yeah, and a month later he's with a new girl.

 

Right? I heard that from an ex once, saying "I'll never stop loving you" like a month after our breakup, then 2 weeks later she's with another guy. Like, what is that...some dramatic bs that they say in the movies or what?

[WomanWriter]

My ex said that. I think he just wanted to make sure I wouldn't hate him or I would have fond memories of him.

 

After over a year being broken up, I do believe he loved me for a long time and meant it when he said he always would. But I wonder if now he really does feel love , or if it's the memory of love he once had. I have a feeling that, put in perspective, he really doesn't love me now, but he did feel that way at the time and meant it anyhow.

 

If we met now, he'd ignore me. He did last time I saw him, which was 3 months ago. That was weird because we weren't on bad terms when he left.

 

What's funny is that I didn't think of him all day! This is the first holiday I didn't think about him until now! My new boyfriend came over to my family's house and hung out for a while but got sick to his stomach and vomitted and had to go home. I was actually more sad that he had to leave. I guess that is a good sign, so I am happy. It will happen again.

 

Also, just because you move on with someone else doesn't mean you don't love the person or love what once was.

[asthesparrow]

Right? I heard that from an ex once, saying "I'll never stop loving you" like a month after our breakup, then 2 weeks later she's with another guy. Like, what is that...some dramatic bs that they say in the movies or what?

 

I think it's more reaffirming for the person who says it. Like, they'll "always love you" so they have that to hold onto & keep them happy & make sure you don't hate them... until they find someone else to transfer their love to. Does that make sense?

I've never said it, because even though I do/did (can't tell) love my ex when I broke up with him recently, I didn't want him to think I'd be holding onto him, or waiting around for him. I want him to think I'm moving on, like I am trying to/am.

Another thing I just realised is when I broke up with my ex he kept saying "Please don't hate me. I know you need to do this, but don't feel bad or angry towards me..."

??? Why? What?

[G-Snap]

Something someone wrote in another thread brought this to mind...

 

What is the purpose of saying this if you're moving on? Seriously, do you think this is something one says in the heat of the moment, or has someone here said that, moved on, found someone else, gotten married and still loved that one person from before?

 

It doesn't have to be false. I admit, I have a visceral love for people in my past relationships. Have no ill will, still love them on an altruistic level. So while I haven't orally uttered "i will always love you" in some small way, I always will. I hope the best for them. That is a true testament to not being petty and small when we can wish those we have moved on from nothing but the best, and altruistic love, and really mean it.

[His Annamchara]

yeah, i too have a special place in my heart for them. I honestly hope for their happiness in the long run no matter how badly they've hurt me in the past.

[G-Snap]

^^even the one who hurt me the most, who is actually very ugly on the inside, i can't bring myself to hate him either, because I can see all too well that he is a very unsettled, unhappy man. I can't hate him because once I loved him, and he just doesn't have the capability of truly loving another. I have seen that. He will go from relationship to relationship searching and seeking, and likely never finding.

 

And I can only pity that. Not hate it.

[His Annamchara]

^^even the one who hurt me the most, who is actually very ugly on the inside, i can't bring myself to hate him either, because I can see all too well that he is a very unsettled, unhappy man. I can't hate him because once I loved him, and he just doesn't have the capability of truly loving another. I have seen that. He will go from relationship to relationship searching and seeking, and likely never finding.

 

And I can only pity that. Not hate it.

 

 

wow... You have just put into words the way I have been feeling for the last month. Thank you soo much!

[arcadefire]

When I was naive and broke up with my first love, I definitely dropped the "I will always love you". In the pain of the break up I've done things I've definitely regretted, that was one of them. Obviously now, looking back after these years, I was just a young naive broken hearted girl. At that time I've definitely meant it, but after experiencing what I know now, it's moot to say stuff like that. And needless to say I don't feel that way about my first ex at all.

[Rangafro]

It doesn't have to be false. I admit, I have a visceral love for people in my past relationships. Have no ill will, still love them on an altruistic level. So while I haven't orally uttered "i will always love you" in some small way, I always will. I hope the best for them. That is a true testament to not being petty and small when we can wish those we have moved on from nothing but the best, and altruistic love, and really mean it.

 

It would be nice if things worked out like this more often, but after just being dumped many people are simply too hurt and cynical to believe it can happen.

[Nixee]

It doesn't have to be false. I admit, I have a visceral love for people in my past relationships. Have no ill will, still love them on an altruistic level. So while I haven't orally uttered "i will always love you" in some small way, I always will. I hope the best for them. That is a true testament to not being petty and small when we can wish those we have moved on from nothing but the best, and altruistic love, and really mean it.

 

Completely agree with this.

 

I can't remember if my ex and I said this to each other exactly. But the feeling was there.

 

We did say "I STILL love you though" while we were breaking up, however... which just felt odd to admit... because the underlying feeling, at least for me, was.. well.. why the hell are we falling apart then?

 

Now though... over 3 years later... that lingering love is still there. And I can still remember the look in his eyes when we stared at each other in the hall the morning we broke up as if to say "I really WILL always love you... but this is the end."

 

So no.. "I'll always love you" isn't always a negative thing. Sometimes it is just a comforting thing. Sometimes it just feels like the easy let down during a hard goodbye. But speaking from several years later... if the love was deep and real... once the bitterness is gone and the respect is still there... you might just still have love there. And you might always have it. And that isn't negative. It's just important to realize that 'love' in that sense does not mean the same is 'be with'.

[absinthe]

When break up happens, if you're the person doing the dumping, it's kind of condescending to do so and if you're the person being dumped, it sounds kind of desperate and manipulative. Either way, I've never said it.

[penelope13]

I've said it and meant it. Just because someone doesn't turn out to be compatible with me, doesn't mean that I can't love this individual as a person, for the history that we shared, and the impact that person had on my life. This doesn't diminish anything about the love that I have for my current partner, because it's a different kind of love and in my books true feelings of love are not a measurable quantity.

[Dako]

Well put, penelope13!

[Sweetkisses22]

Well because at the time you believe you will always love them because you still loved them at that time. But the truth is, we eventually move on and look back at the relationship and say "I really didn't love him as much as I thought I did." That's usually how it goes. Depends on the relationship I think though.

[Hurting85]

Something someone wrote in another thread brought this to mind...

 

What is the purpose of saying this if you're moving on? Seriously, do you think this is something one says in the heat of the moment, or has someone here said that, moved on, found someone else, gotten married and still loved that one person from before?

 

I do still love my ex. He was a huge part of my life (4 years together) and it ended awfully and abruptly. He'll always have a place in my heart, but I have no desire to ever rekindle anything, and my husband has definitely squished his little bit of space, but I'll always be here if he needs me and he's there for me.

[petite]

I told him that even though he was the one that ended it. I meant it then, but things change, as rare as it is, people change and feelings change. We both used to say it while we were together "nothing would ever separate us, we will always be together bla bla". Truth is, sometimes love just isn't enough.