What does it mean when...

[seaass]

Me and my girlfriend have been getting on each others nerves lately. One night last week everything each other said seemed to piss the other person off. She went away on that weekend to visit her friend out of town. With the free time I had without my girlfriend I thought that when she got back I should have a serious talk with my girlfriend. We have been going out for over 2 years and we never really had any serious fights. We always had alot of fun together. We love being with each other. Some times I get a little mad, when she does not want to do anything or she does not have time to do anything. I usually just pout, and get over it. Well when she got back we had a serious talk. She brought up the issue of taking a break. I did not like the issue of taking a break cause I knew that we would end up back together anyways. I agreed to the issue of taking a break and left her house. But before she left she started to cry as did I. We then had a good cry together and then decided to sleep on it. Well last night we decided not to take a break. Would it be a good idea to take a break?? Do breaks really work?? But when we were talking it seemed like she was telling me something. She finally told me that she would like more space. What does that mean?? and how do i give it to her?? Thank you to anyone who reply's.

[chakka]

Hi.

 

I think all couples go through things like this.

I have also been with my b/f for about 2 years, just like you guys, and it can be scary. Maybe your g/f is a little scared by the depth of your relationship, or she's afraid of depending on you too much. I may just be projecting though, because these are feelings tha I sometimes have.

The fact that you both broke down and cried at the idea of a break probably shows that you love each other after all, that you do want to be together, and are just going through a weird phase.

Many friends of mine went through this, funnily enough, at the 2 year mark. We have taken to calling it "the 2 year crisis".

 

 

By the way, I never tried it, but I've heard that the "break" thing can be dangerous, because it's not clear cut. You don't konw if you're allowed to see other people or not. You don't know if you should move on or not.

It's probably better to either be together or really break up. After breaking up she might regret it for fear of losing you, and you'll get back together again. But the "break" thing can leave either of you feeling like you can fool around and the other will just be waiting for you, or vice versa... leave you sulking and waiting for the other while the other fools around.

But don't take my word for it, because i DON'T have the experience to back it up. I've just heard that from other people, and it seemed to make sense.

 

 

As for how to give her space: talk to her and try to find out what is scaring her. Does she think you want take the relationship further (moving in or marriage) and is she afraid? Then assure her you'll wait for her. Does she maybe feel like she has no life outside of you or you have no life outside of her? Maybe limit the amount of time you spend together and each of you make an effort to expand your life, like taking up some new hobbies or reconnecting with old friends...

These are just some random thoughts, mostly from my own experience. I'm sure you're issue are somewhat different, but you get the idea...

 

 

I hope this helped at least a little. And take solace in the fact that many couples I know came through this successfully.

 

Keep us posted and good luck.

[brandos lovechild]

try givin her that 'break' she wants, call her bluff !! its about time men started havin confidence that if one relationship doesn't work out it's not the end of the world . the male animal was born to spread its seed, where did we go wrong and let girls make us cry and vomit with love-sickness. i assure you this is not a delicate issue.