Can sex be a boring chore for a woman without a vaginal orgasm?

[friendsoulmate]

It wasn't until I read these sex posts from bloggers and women bloggers who said most women can not achieve a vaginal orgasm. How disappointing. Are women in relationships, when, if a man is not sensitive to a woman's need to have an orgasm, and he doesn't know how to give her one with his penis and doesn't care, then imagine a predictable sex routine of the selfish, insensitive man, thrusting a woman, doggy-style, and the woman is not getting any good sensation from this, so this could become a boring chore routine, similar to waiting for your hair to dry at a salon. The woman could be on the bed flipping through a magazine or playing solitaire, while he's giving it all he's got. Could sex become a boring chore for a woman without a vaginal orgasm and who has an insensitive man?

[Jd1983]

It's one thing when the man is being selfish and doesn't care, it's another that you cannot achieve a vaginal orgasm.

 

Just because you can't achieve a vaginal orgasm, doesn't mean that you can't do so by clitoral stimulation. Secondly, even if you can't achieve an orgasm, the sex can still be enjoyable.

 

It's only a chore if you make it to be.

[Cognitive_Canine]

Just because I do not orgasm does not mean I don't get good sensations. I just can't finish but the whole thing is pretty awesome. I honestly don't care if I have an orgasm any more. It feels great and that's all that matters.

[Keyman]

With my partners that have not been able to achieve vaginal orgasms, they have all told me that the whole process is highly enjoyable, in that they are being stimulated more than the guy is throughout sex.

[Sky-Cherries]

Yeah, you fail at feeling pleasure so it's obviously all the man's fault.

 

Maybe women should stop thinking everything should be handed to them with minimal effort on their part, and actually do something to help the situation.

It's probably because they go in there expecting not to be given an orgasm so they lie there like a boneless fish and examine their nails.

What man would bother giving such a boring woman any effort.

 

The vaginal myth is untrue, I hit 30+ orgasms a night and I hate being touched anywhere near the clitoris. Awful feeling, it is. Too sensitive.

[MakestheBest]

I dont really understand the question. Does it feel different to other women because I never noticed. An orgasm is an orgasm is an orgasm. It doesnt matter what was done to achieve it...as long as he is involved its all good...i think. Most of mine are vaginal.

 

I agree with the above poster. Lmao @ the boneless fish comment. Your orgasm is not something a man hands you in a giftwrapped box, 50...no like 70 percent is all on you. (30 percent of that is educating him).

[dragon lady]

I don't even know what a vaginal orgasm feels like and I love sex. In fact, I don't even orgasm through sex. It's the foreplay that gets me off. I think of that as being for me and the actual intercourse as being for him. However, we both still enjoy both very much.

 

Clitoral orgasms are extremely underrated, in my opinion. I'm not even sure I could handle the intensity of these "vaginal orgasms" if they are what people say they are.

[candykisses]

It might be a psychological thing. A lot of girls who were sexually abused in childhood and/or adolescence can't enjoy sex. Those same girls, however, are able to achieve orgasm when masturbating. To them, sex with the opposite sex can indeed be a boring, if not unpleasant, chore.

[OptomisticGirl]

I have never had a vaginal orgasm and I'm telling you now, I love sex.

 

All the sensations and feelings... it's not about if I have one or when I have one, sometimes I don't even mind not having one, it's just about enjoying it.

[KG]

Why can't he give you a clitoral orgasm, then have sex? It's always worked for me. And I've never been with a woman who had a vaginal orgasm.

[Cheeks18]

Orrrrrr....RUB THE CLIT DURING SEX????

[Brownstone322]

... then imagine a predictable sex routine of the selfish, insensitive man, thrusting a woman, doggy-style, and the woman is not getting any good sensation from this ...

Maybe my brethren will chime in here and support me, but my partners seem to have gotten lots of good sensations from doggie-style sex. Either that or they should be nominated for Academy Awards.

[april15]

My gf much prefers a vaginal orgasm. She says I have oral skills and I can tell she enjoys a clitoral orgasm but not to the same degree as when she orgasms during intercourse. This post has me thinking outside the box and find ways to make the intercourse more stimulating for her. 90% of the time she will orgasm and she says she loves our sex life but you can never stop learning right? What are some things your average guys have done to help push you over the top during intercourse?

[april15]

Seems to me that doggie style has always been about me. My partners have enjoyed it especially if I can reach around and do some extra stimulating but it has always been my pick not theirs.

[OptomisticGirl]

Maybe my brethren will chime in here and support me, but my partners seem to have gotten lots of good sensations from doggie-style sex. Either that or they should be nominated for Academy Awards.

 

lol, that made me laugh, although true....

[Cognitive_Canine]

Seems to me that doggie style has always been about me. My partners have enjoyed it especially if I can reach around and do some extra stimulating but it has always been my pick not theirs.

 

I love doggy style but my partner is too tall and I am too short to do it spontaneously. We have to use pillows and figure out angles. It's not something we do often because of that.

 

A lot of women don't like doggy style because A) We don't have a good view, just staring at the floor, sheets, whatever. B ) It doesn't feel as intimate to a lot of people. It's not that they dislike it but there are just better positions in their mind. Also, some women have hang ups. They feel like they are being too forward to ask for such a male dominated sex position.

[MakestheBest]

I love doggy style but my partner is too tall and I am too short to do it spontaneously. We have to use pillows and figure out angles. It's not something we do often because of that.

 

A lot of women don't like doggy style because A) We don't have a good view, just staring at the floor, sheets, whatever. B ) It doesn't feel as intimate to a lot of people. It's not that they dislike it but there are just better positions in their mind. Also, some women have hang ups. They feel like they are being too forward to ask for such a male dominated sex position.

I'm 6 feet tall and my ex was shorter than me, it wasnt' really a problem except that during doggie style i had to come down so low that after awhile the socket where my hip and thigh meet might ache.

 

I dont' know if this would help you, but his bed is directly on the floor and it was easy for both of us if we just bent over the side of the bed.

[Cognitive_Canine]

I'm 6 feet tall and my ex was shorter than me, it wasnt' really a problem except that during doggie style i had to come down so low that after awhile the socket where my hip and thigh meet might ache.

 

I dont' know if this would help you, but his bed is directly on the floor and it was easy for both of us if we just bent over the side of the bed.

 

For it to work using a surface to bend over on, my feet would have to be off the ground. While it would work, I'd literally have my innards pinched against whatever I was being lifted on. We've tried but I ended up brushing both hips.

 

I've thought about getting some of that sex furniture as I imagine that's much more comfortable.

[quirky]

The first few times I've had sex with someone I can't really orgasm because of the trust and lack of familiarity. But further down the line what's the point of doing it if I don't come too? Yes we are a bit more complicated. But we are soft and smell nice and it's worth the effort. A good man or a man that wants good sex will make the effort.

 

I also agree with MakesTheBest that it is a lot up to the woman to relax and guide the guy. I've only had one partner that wasn't extremely eager to please me and he was quite selfish in other areas too.

 

Seems to me that doggie style has always been about me. My partners have enjoyed it especially if I can reach around and do some extra stimulating but it has always been my pick not theirs.

 

I think it's pretty good, better than missionary.

[HouseKitten]

I can't orgasm during penetration either, but it feels a lot better if he makes me cum manually first, then we have sex. I'm more sensitive.

 

Plus, sex is very intimate. It's about more than just the orgasm for us, it's about being very very close.

[KG]

Plus, sex is very intimate. It's about more than just the orgasm for us, it's about being very very close.

 

The same for me. I can make her O a few times, and I don't always get off, but the intimacy is the reward.

[MakestheBest]

I've only had one partner that wasn't extremely eager to please me and he was quite selfish in other areas too.

 

guys personalities carry into the bed ( at least that's my theory and one confirmed by my own experiences and my girlfriends). Guys who like to please like to please in bed. Guys who are selfish in life are selfish in bed. And if you meet a guy who doesnt listen to you when you talk...get ready for some baaad sex.

 

 

@ Cognitive...there was these pillows that I was interested in back in the day just for kicks. they are kind of expensive tho...i can't remember the name it was something non-sexy. Do you have a stool in the house- maybe you can put that next to the bedside and use it...hmm but then you would have to keep your knees together-nvrmind-if he's really tall you can try kneeling on the bed with him standing behind you instead of over the bed like me and my ex. Honestly i dont know why that worked physically it just did- i have NO idea what he was doing back there!

Or maybe an excersize machine that puts you at the right height?

[Puddincup]

Just because I do not orgasm does not mean I don't get good sensations. I just can't finish but the whole thing is pretty awesome. I honestly don't care if I have an orgasm any more. It feels great and that's all that matters.

 

Now that you don't care, you will be more likely to have them.

[Puddincup]

Orrrrrr....RUB THE CLIT DURING SEX????

 

Just be careful not to directly touch "the man in the boat". Rub around him but touching directly is too sensitive, too painful. ouch!

[Puddincup]

Maybe my brethren will chime in here and support me, but my partners seem to have gotten lots of good sensations from doggie-style sex. Either that or they should be nominated for Academy Awards.

 

Doggie style works. Girl on top. Missionary. It's all good. Even when I don't climax. I usually do but even if I don't, I still enjoy the sensations. The whole thing just feels so good. Plus I feel closer to my BF so it's emotional too. Sex is just GREAT. period.