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what to do when you've alienated almost everyone around you


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Let's say you meet many new acquaintances over the course of four years but you do the following things, distancing these people from you in the process:

1. being lazy about maintaining contact

2. giving bad first impressions (or second), enough to want to avoid conversations with you

3. unintentionally forgetting to greet them when you run into them somewhere

4. being too shy to build closer relationship with these people

 

Does anyone know a good way to deal with this situation? I feel like I've burned too many bridges (i.e. friendships) here.

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Maybe some of those people would give you another chance? I know that sometimes friends go through a funk and aren't such "good" freinds, I do the same. Some people understand this will give it another go(Unless you do it time and time again over the coarse of years). Maybe sending out some cards or letters letting them know you're thinking of them would be a good start. If you already think you've lost them, trying won't hurt any. The worst that will happen will be finding out you were right. On the other hand, you might learn that you have better friends than you thought.

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#2 would be the most difficult thing to overcome. First impressions are very difficult to change.

 

Everything else, you could start by contacting them, at a time when you DON'T need something from them. Nothing is more annoying than to get a call from someone you haven't spoken to in years, asking you to do them some sort of favor. Just shoot an email saying that they popped in your mind & you realized you hadn't spoken in a while, so you wanted to see how they are doing. If all goes well with a few conversations back & forth, suggest hanging out sometime or something.

 

It's hard to stay in contact when you've all gone your separate ways. I rarely talk to any friends from college. I guess I don't really see the point of it. We live so far away & are doing our own things that what's the point?

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