distanceguy Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 Hi all, ive been in very happy long-distance relationship for over 3 months now. we met at a party, and a week later i went to visit for about 4 days. after that we were officially dating. we get to see eachother as often as i have enough money, which has been enough to keep us very happy. we became very close after only a month, and are only getting closer. very few things bother me about her, and i dont have alot of relationship experience, so i dont know if i have the right to be annoyed by some of these things. one that has been on my mind is the amount of "guy friends" she has. she has about 6 guys friends for every 1 female friends she has. this has alot to do with her personality, and it is why i love her, but it still feels strange. she is also friends with a good amount of her ex-boyfriends. but she insists that they are cool now, and are JUST friends. I dont really have any issues with trusting her, but the guys are another story. ive met very few of them, and i know its sometimes hard for a guy to be just friends. im just a little worried that they might try something, and im a little upset that she hasnt really considered that this might bother me. im sure if i was hanging out with a lady friend of mine, she wouldnt like it either. im plenty cool with her hanging out with her guy friends, and talking to them, but today she went to a movie alone with one of her old friends. i didnt like this. i havnt mentioned it to her yet, because i dont know if this is me being over-sensative. is it ok for her to be going out alone with her guys friends? do i have any right to draw the line anywhere? Link to comment
Richard- Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 You have to just trust her man. Guy friends are usually guys who she friendzoned. If she wanted to cheat on you, she would regardless if she's hanging out with a guy friend or not. Link to comment
distanceguy Posted January 4, 2010 Author Share Posted January 4, 2010 alright thanks alot. i'll just have to learn to deal with it. your prolly right about the friendzone thing Link to comment
pinkelephant Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 be really careful with this. my ex was like this and it was a huge turn off. ironically enough, i told him i was going to the movies with a guy friend and he freaked out and wouldn't let me. needless to say, i made a point to go. trust her! Link to comment
HealingHandsWarmHeart Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 If she was going to screw around with her guy friends.. she would have done it before she met you- i agree with Richard- these are the guys she has friendzoned - think about it like this .. she is SAFER being with her guy friends - because other guys will see her with him think are they together and she won't get approached =) Link to comment
lhr Posted January 5, 2010 Share Posted January 5, 2010 sorry to be the one to throw a wrench in this, but distanceguy has a valid concern. Play it cool about this, but don't totally overlook it either. As you get to know this girl better hopefully you'll learn if she is someone you can trust or someone you should worry about. Unfortunately some girls like having lots of guy friends because they like the male attention and because it makes them feel more desirable. Remember, girl's derive a lot of value and sense of self-worth by how desirable they think they are to the opposite sex. From a guy's perspective, personally, I've never been friends with a good-looking girl whom I've ruled out being more than "just friends" for no apparent reason. Any guy who claims otherwise is full of it! "Friendzoned" these guys may be at the moment, but that's why it's called a zone: it's not necessarily permanent. So, keep an eye. Good luck! Link to comment
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