markie b Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 ok well ive been thinking yes scary thought i try not to think to much hehehe. well what happens if theyre hurting and to try and stop the pain even tho they dont want to be with you but just want to stop the pain and use you some more would that be ok with you or not really? i mean your hurting and know they dont want you thats usualy the reason you hurt,because of the rejection and the loss of someone you care alot about. so if your going after them still knowing they dont want you or arnt interested but feel kinda bad and get with you out of pity or guilt is that really going to make you feel better?is that going to make everything ok again or now things have happened is those thoughts of them leaving going to still be there in your mind? Link to comment
SparklyBoots Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Well it hurts...a lot! I have tried the friends thing with my ex but over the course of 10 months we hooked up three times and each time it felt wonderful at the time but afterwards there was the coldness and the I don't want a relationship, this changes nothing words...the feeling of losing your self respect for crumbs is awful...it made things worse so that now we can't even be friends...knowing I was so weak makes me feel humiliated. Now we have no contact. It doesn't make you feel better as it just brings back what you have lost and each time you get rejected again you have to deal with it as if it is new and dleays the healing....well that is just my experience, maybe others have found differently... Link to comment
In the Dark Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 That sort of behavior flicks on my rage switch. If you want to get in the sack me then you should have ****ed with me. Link to comment
1guygirl Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 ...the feeling of losing your self respect for crumbs is awful...it made things worse so that now we can't even be friends...knowing I was so weak makes me feel humiliated. QUOTE] says it all really well for me.... he didnt stay true to his word and really try....so this is for the best as in better for me... he could have taken it slower with me until he got his feelings straight or messing with mine, so he could hear me say "i love you" to him...but he didnt, and hes 42 so again, this is for the best, as in better for me... i can see his attempts (i think?) at trying to get me jealous over silly lil things so he would feel better, if this was the case, then yet again, this is for the best as in better for me... but he wants to be friends as we had something very special (blah blah but does he lead on his other female friends, making empty promises, messing with their emotions after theyve been through hell, and coming in them, only to drop a bombshell outta nowhere in a resturaunt??? ...no i dont think he does....so..... why should i accept anything less?? the answer is i wont...so friends is not on the cards for us but NC is and he knows it. Just dont think he knows it will be an indefinate NC....yet Link to comment
ElizaLibbyBeth Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 As you can see from my post last night...I was the crumb taker. And it left me feeling like total crap. Sure, during the time I was there...I felt a sense of familiarity and a small sense of relief...BUT deep inside I knew what I was doing was setting myself up and had a sense of sadness the whole time. So...I had crumbs over the past weekend...let's just say I am left feeling worse, stupid, and taken advantage of. But I have to blame myself too...I allowed myself to be treated/used this way. Next time I'll stay home and have a Triscuit...lol Link to comment
Louie3 Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 Its bad but right now I feel like I would take anything I could get. I'm so hurt and miss his company so bad. I initiated NC on the 24th and I just wrote him an email saying that if he ever feels like he loves me to let me know. I haven't sent it but I want to, I will see how I feel in a few hours. Link to comment
petite Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 At one point I thought even if " he didn't want me" I still wanted him and "us". I thought that was enough to "change" his mind and make him want me. I see now how wrong that is. He didn't want me, and it took a lot of painful things to happen for me to realize how much he didn't want me. I'm not sure I would even take him back at this point because I have realized a lot since he changed his number and in many ways "pushed" me out of his life. Link to comment
ycmanvs Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 I have made that mistake in previous relationships and it just drags on and on. This time around I have forced myself not to go back and it is painful, but I think it is better in the long run because you respect yourself more if you do not go back. Link to comment
ghostdog Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 this is just a selfish act...just know if you've been dumped and your ex comes back and almost immediately you 2 are in the sack... go for it if you just want to hit the sheets with them. but the best thing honestly- is to pull back from them and not give them what they want...talk to them about it and if they truly want you back, they'll come back for more time and attention from you. if they just are feeling bad and hadn't gotten with someone else- then most likely its just a moment of feelings loneliness and loss for them and they'll forget about you before they get their car started... so you gotta be able to deal wtih that as the dumpee... Link to comment
ycmanvs Posted December 28, 2009 Share Posted December 28, 2009 this is just a selfish act...just know if you've been dumped and your ex comes back and almost immediately you 2 are in the sack... go for it if you just want to hit the sheets with them. but the best thing honestly- is to pull back from them and not give them what they want...talk to them about it and if they truly want you back, they'll come back for more time and attention from you. if they just are feeling bad and hadn't gotten with someone else- then most likely its just a moment of feelings loneliness and loss for them and they'll forget about you before they get their car started... so you gotta be able to deal wtih that as the dumpee... Very true and very hard to do. If you agree to see your ex, you have to do it in a public place where there is no chance that you will end up in bed. Link to comment
.jpg.1626fbc48c04fd9021fd315819807524.thumb.jpg.882936eb5901fa05cf31c75617acde2e.jpg)
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.