lila... Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Well I would rather live my life BEFORE I settle down and get married (not saying that I won't live when I'm married either), rather than marry young, have kids and a husband, and then have to second-think all my decisions because it's no longer about me, but having them to be considered as well. I'm not saying you can't have fun and live when you're married, I'm just saying it's much easier when you're not and there are a lot more things you can do too. Besides, who are we kidding, when you're already settled into family life and have kids that go to school and a career or husband/wife to tend to, how often can you find the time to take weekend trips or make spontanous decisions? Not as often enough as when you're single and without many commitments. Link to comment
rocio Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I know married couples who have lived in Japan. Others who have lived in China. I don't know why you'd want to join the peace corp but I'm pretty sure they don't discriminate against the hitched. Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 People generally become set in their ways past 30. They tend to think that "their way is the right way" or so to speak, which makes it difficult. People find it harder to compromise as they have been living on their own and doing it their way for so long. And young adults not even out of their teens are usually used to getting their way right away, so it goes both ways. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 I know married couples who have lived in Japan. Others who have lived in China. I don't know why you'd want to join the peace corp but I'm pretty sure they don't discriminate against the hitched. Yes, but while I want to live in japan my partner is a 6 foot 1 man who knows nothing of japanese culture. It's great if both people want to go but I'm not haulting his career so that I can drag him to a place he doesn't want to go. Link to comment
jc123 Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 marriage isn't the be-all end-all. you dont have to be married to be in a loving, commited relationship. my mum and her b/f have been together for 15 years and have been much more successful than her marriage to my father. are you sure you want to settle down at such a young age? Link to comment
Alezia Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 And young adults not even out of their teens are usually used to getting their way right away, so it goes both ways. Yes, but everything is a period of transition at that point - it's easier to change. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 Yes, but everything is a period of transition at that point - it's easier to change. Yes, it is easier to change. And it's easy to find yourself a different person than you were when you got married. Or worse, one day you realize your partner isn't the same person you married. Personality doesn't stabilize until the 30's. Link to comment
rocio Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 You never get married with the assumption that either you or your partner won't change. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 You never get married with the assumption that either you or your partner won't change. The change from 20 until 30 is probably greater than the change from 35 until death. Link to comment
rocio Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 lol, I sure as heck hope you're wrong. But I get what you're saying. I do. That's why I didn't marry at 20. But I don't believe there's necessarily a certain way you should or shouldn't do things. Just different choices with different consequences - some good and some bad. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted December 7, 2009 Share Posted December 7, 2009 lol, I sure as heck hope you're wrong. But I get what you're saying. I do. That's why I didn't marry at 20. But I don't believe there's necessarily a certain way you should or shouldn't do things. Just different choices with different consequences - some good and some bad. It just bothers me that the OP set some arbitrary age for himself. He doesn't even have a girlfriend yet has decided to marry young. Makes me think he is marrying for the wrong reasons. Link to comment
BriarRose Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 My parents were married young (23) and I think that I want to do the same. I don't see myself alone for very long and preferably I would like to be married before 20. I know that I should wait for whoever is "right" for me, and I will but it seems weird that I want to get married young. Usually I hear that the guy is typically less pushy for commitment, but I seem to be the opposite. What do you guys think, and how do you feel about marriage and age? .. I think that is nice that you want to marry young. But still be choosey - don't just settle for the sake of getting married. Link to comment
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