Firiel Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 My fiancé and I recently got engaged (*gets giddy just thinking about it*), and now we're starting to think about a wedding. I'd like a fairly cheap wedding. Not only do we have to pay for it ourselves, but I also have a problem with the idea of spending thousands upon thousands of dollars that could be used for something useful on one day. My sister's wedding several years ago cost $10,000 (my parents paid for it), my cousin's cost $30,000, and apparently the average cost for a wedding is $20,000... I'm beginning to wonder if a nice wedding with a budget of $3,500 (which is what I would like to use) is even possible... So I guess my question is... can a nice wedding be put on for $3,500 dollars? And how? Thanks! Link to comment
InBruges Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 Where I live it's $65 at the courthouse. Get the marriage license and put it in your file cabinet. A wedding is just a day but love lasts forever...or something =) Link to comment
Sanesoul Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 My husband and I had a lovely wedding outdoors that cost us about $1000. Link to comment
Firiel Posted November 4, 2009 Author Share Posted November 4, 2009 Where I live it's $65 at the courthouse. Get the marriage license and put it in your file cabinet. A wedding is just a day but love lasts forever...or something =) I have definitely thought about doing that. But I like the idea of a ceremony... just not an expensive one. And his family has been dying for a wedding in the family, and they have been so supportive of us... even if I didn't care at all, I'd like to have one for them. My husband and I had a lovely wedding outdoors that cost us about $1000. Excellent. Thanks... it's great to know it can happen. Link to comment
DropToZero Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 You'd have to ask my fiance herself more about it, but we're doing the same thing as you... save money save money save money! Ooooh yeah, and congratulations! Umm.. ours is going to be budgeted around $6000, so we did really well by searching out good prices and people we knew to get discounts. Again, she knows more about this, but as far as I can tell... catering/feeding everyone seems to be one of the most expensive things. If you can cut your list down, or find a cheaper way to feed everyone... that's one of the best ways to cut costs. Hope that helps Link to comment
Firiel Posted November 4, 2009 Author Share Posted November 4, 2009 Again, she knows more about this, but as far as I can tell... catering/feeding everyone seems to be one of the most expensive things. If you can cut your list down, or find a cheaper way to feed everyone... that's one of the best ways to cut costs. Yeah, we were thinking about having a BBQ for a reception... and maybe a cupcake tower instead of the traditional wedding cake. Both those options sound fun and informal to me, which is who we both are. I just don't want them to come off as tacky... Link to comment
Christiana Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 hmm....I tried my hardest to have a cheap wedding but it ended up costing 12,000. (which I guess is on the cheap side) we found ONE church that went on a donation basis. the rest charged like a thousand dollars (which is ridiculous!!!) a Dj alone is expsive, I hired my brother. a cake is expsive and so is a dress and food. those 3 things alone would total 3,500!!! good luck!!! try to go with paper goods, that what we did. it helps. Link to comment
Sanesoul Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 Yeah, we were thinking about having a BBQ for a reception... and maybe a cupcake tower instead of the traditional wedding cake. Both those options sound fun and informal to me, which is who we both are. I just don't want them to come off as tacky... That's not tacky at all. In fact, I would find it more intimate and special. More of a celebration of two families coming together than a stuffy affair. Link to comment
lady00 Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 Well, if you decide you do want a cake after all, you could try having a one-tier cake and then serving the guests something else for desert. A friend of mine did this. Her cake was beautiful, but small. And we got cupcakes for desert. Link to comment
Scorpion Fury Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 probably not helpful but im dying to know why your parents paid for your sister's wedding and not yours. Link to comment
Christiana Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 the less people u invite the cheaper. oh, and if you want a REALLY good gift do link removed it's a site where you can book a cruise or any vacation and have people buy you parts of your honeymoon. so you end up paying for nothing!! and the money actually goes into your account so you can use it for whatever you want!! Link to comment
Firiel Posted November 4, 2009 Author Share Posted November 4, 2009 probably not helpful but im dying to know why your parents paid for your sister's wedding and not yours. They hate my fiance... Link to comment
Scorpion Fury Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 They hate my fiance... lame. i'd do it in the summertime and have a byob bbq at the park or someone's back yard. i don't even care how ghetto that is. better than dropping 10 grand on one stupid day. i would make sure i looked like a princess in my dress and to hell with everything else. Link to comment
lady00 Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 They hate my fiance... I'm sorry to hear that Why? I hope that they grow to love him eventually. Link to comment
InBruges Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 They hate my fiance... Does he have a lot of tattoos and a job at an adult novelty shop or something? Link to comment
DropToZero Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 Yeah, we were thinking about having a BBQ for a reception... and maybe a cupcake tower instead of the traditional wedding cake. Both those options sound fun and informal to me, which is who we both are. I just don't want them to come off as tacky... Yeah in the end, it's still your wedding... make it how you want it. My parents didn't even feed anyone at their wedding other than cake, that's how they saved money. They had their wedding/reception at like 2-3pm in the afternoon so everyone could eat before and after. Cake's aren't too bad if you can find someone you know who makes them(and does it well), you gotta connect with people, family helps the most(except I did read that your parents don't like your fiance, sorry). the DJ, photography, venue/church, and your wedding dress I think are the next most expensive things(not sure about the order on that though) Link to comment
Firiel Posted November 4, 2009 Author Share Posted November 4, 2009 lame. i'd do it in the summertime and have a byob bbq at the park or someone's back yard. i don't even care how ghetto that is. better than dropping 10 grand on one stupid day. i would make sure i looked like a princess in my dress and to hell with everything else. Yeah, I know. I want something fun and enjoyable. That's it. We want to have an outdoor wedding, on the Oregon Coast, preferably. Even if we could afford a super expensive wedding, I'd much rather spend that money on something like a car instead. Does he have a lot of tattoos and a job at an adult novelty shop or something? He's going to be a pastor, and therefore poor. That's the problem. Link to comment
Christiana Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 so he's a good christian man that loves you and they won't help you with your wedding cause he doesn't have money??? Link to comment
DropToZero Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 Yeah, I know. I want something fun and enjoyable. That's it. We want to have an outdoor wedding, on the Oregon Coast, preferably. Even if we could afford a super expensive wedding, I'd much rather spend that money on something like a car instead. He's going to be a pastor, and therefore poor. That's the problem. I'd be ready to smack my parents... sorry, I mean no disrespect, but that's ridiculous. I know they're looking out for your well being and health, and I know money can be a huge issue in relationships/marriage(and trust me it is, make sure you're on the same page completely)... but uuuugh I'd be so pissed if that was the legitimate reason they didn't like a S/O. Link to comment
shes2smart Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 My wedding cost about $200, and that included rings. Of course, it was just me & him, at the courthouse and we went to lunch & the movies (with free passes) afterwards and that was it. If you want to do more than that, you'll probably have to pay more. A couple things I've observed about other people's weddings: Most of your costs will be the reception (party), not the actual ceremony. I once went to an afternoon wedding where the reception was held in a hotel ballroom and the food consisted of deli trays (sandwiches), potato salad-type stuff, fruit & veggie trays, a cake and no alcohol. The "no alcohol" was out of respect for the beliefs of the grandparents of the groom, but it really cut the cost of the reception way down, as did the "cold lunch" food choices. You might also want to go to a cake decorating store or culinary school (if there's one in your area) to see if you can find some student or someone who does cakes for a hobby or as a side business for a price break. My mom used to do wedding cakes as a hobby and she charged less than what the local bakeries/grocery stores did because it was a hobby. Someone who is studying culinary arts might welcome the opportunity to do a "real" job (for less than an experienced professional would charge) they can add to their portfolio. A friend of mine who went to culinary school used to do cakes and small catering jobs on the side before she graduated for that reason. Link to comment
Firiel Posted November 4, 2009 Author Share Posted November 4, 2009 I'd be ready to smack my parents... sorry, I mean no disrespect, but that's ridiculous. I know they're looking out for your well being and health, and I know money can be a huge issue in relationships/marriage(and trust me it is, make sure you're on the same page completely)... but uuuugh I'd be so pissed if that was the legitimate reason they didn't like a S/O. Oh yeah, it's frustrating to say the least. They have a couple of other BS reasons that don't make sense, but I've come to realize that the money is the main thing. But we are on the same page. We both realize that we won't be able to afford having kids for awhile, and that we both may eventually have to take on second jobs to make ends meet... but we're okay with that. Link to comment
Mavh25 Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 If you really want a wedding that cheap, you're gonna have to cut major corners. One of the corners we cut, was to not have a party atall with the first dance and stuff, limited our number of guests to 20, made our own of whatever we could, including the cake, favours etc. Bridesmaids got their own dresses etc. it still cost us alot... Link to comment
InBruges Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 Wow... Tell them Joel Osteen seems to be doing alright... Link to comment
Darkness_Falls Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 Hello Me and my fiance have just purchased our own little apartment so we are going to be hard up for our wedding as well when it comes. I have already started planning even though we don't have a date or anything. And I have already found ways to save thousands (well, maybe hundreds, still a good chunk though). Does anyone you know have a good camera, or do amateur photography? I found like 4 people who would be at our wedding have SLR cameras and are good at photography so we are asking them all to do a combined effort for our photography as a wedding gift to us. We will have lots of photos that way and then send them to one of those photobook websites and get them made into a book for around £40. My fiance's gran and mum are both good cooks with cakes so they will make us a lemon meringue cake and an apple pie (big ones) and we will use those instead of fruit cakes (neither of us like fruit cakes anyway). Again, that will be a wedding gift to us. A friend of ours did a course in floristry and is now working in a florist and will give us discount on flowers. I don't mind how much my dress costs so willing to get it from a place like Landy Bridal or ebay. Or just put a regular corset and skirt together, decorate with beads etc and pay quarter of the price that a proper wedding dress would cost. Ask around family/friends if they have things like shoes/veil/tiara that you could borrow. For favours we will have fortune cookies for everyone. Cheap but fun. I will also make all the stationary, cheaper than getting it all personalised. For jewellery I don't mind wearing stuff I have already. Rings, well we bought my wedding ring at Disneyland for $35. It's silver, with diamonds (not real ones hehe) and looks really pretty with the diamonds in the shape of mouse heads (you would only realise this if you knew where I got it from, not obvious) so it's special to me but didn't cost the earth. Another idea is to have the ceremony somewhere cheap like the court house or whatever (I'm in UK so not sure if that's the equivalent of a registry office), but decorate it up nice like maybe with a few personal things such as a nice photo of you and your man, a personal ornament that you like, handmade crafts, its not too hard to decorate on the cheap. We are having a winter wedding and I intend on making snowflakes or something out of shiny paper. A bit of tinsel perhaps? Fairy lights? Candles? Candles are cheap but effective and romantic. For transportation I don't need a fancy car or horse and carriage. My dad has a vehicle which would fit the whole bridal party in so if he put a bow on that I would be just as happy. For the meal you could have it outside in someone's garden, find a friend or family member with a big garden and ask if they will lend it to you as a wedding gift. Get everyone to bring a dish of food with them and you will have more than enough to feed all your guests. And you didn't even need to pay a dime! We are looking into a function suite nearby who do a package deal of £5,000. For that you get a premium sit down meal for 50 guests, premium buffet for 120, all drinks, table decorations, place cards, table plan, cake stand and knife, flowers, red carpet, transport for bridal party, dj and disco, toast master, AND A FREE BAR UNTIL MIDNIGHT. So yeah, we are pretty taken by that. I will work in a lot of my money saving ideas as well so it shouldn't cost more than £6,000ish. Not sure we can even afford that, I am with you in thinking that the money could be put to much better use. May tighten the purse strings a bit I hope that helps. Link to comment
FarthestEdge Posted November 5, 2009 Share Posted November 5, 2009 It all comes down to personal choices. The reception is definitley the biggest part of the cost, but not the only place to save. *Buy invitations at Kinkos/Business Depot that you can print out at home....or make them yourself if you're crafty. *If it's a summer wedding, buy a simple dress from the discount rack this winter. You can likely find something lovely for $100 *Use synthetic flowers and make your own bouquets. *Choose a colour, but invite your bridemaids to each have their own unique sundress (keep it informal) *Get married barefoot in the grass..save on pricey shoes! *Keep hair & makeup informal, & do it yourself. *Definitely a picnic could be done. Rent Coordinating blankets, or watch you local liquidator. *Make your own wine- this can cost as little as $3 a bottle *I like the cupcake tower idea...a chocolate fountain could be fun too. *Enlist the help of your friends and family wherever possible. Even let them know their help is gift enough. That should quiet any naysayers who look at it in a "I spent $$ on a gift, so the meal/booze should be worth at least that much"(which by the way IS tacky to think that way). For example, If you have a friend with a good camera, ask them to be the photographer as their gift to you. So much can be done with a good digital SLR. As for it being 'tacky', keep the invite list down to people who really matter to you, and to whom you really matter. Most of them will know your situation and not even consider the celebration from that perspective. They'll just be happy to celebrate with you. Congratulations! Get creative, there's a million ways to do it. And I agree with the others, the wedding is one day, the marriage is what matters. Link to comment
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