Burden to my Fiance

[Hanz33]

I have such a negative attitude towards everything. He gets on with life.

 

My partners wages are 3x that of mine.

 

He is so smart (and i am talking about incredibly smart) E.g He will remember an insignificant page number of a book he was reading and can tell you a week later what that page number was (no joke). I am a * * * * * * * .

 

I am scared of my incapabilities while he embrases learning.

 

I keep him awake with my crying when he is on call and needs sleep

 

I beg for comfort from him(e.g hugs) at the most inapropriate time.

 

I don't bother with sex.

 

My future looks like a dead end and his..god he could be anything.

 

I am such a downfall in this relationship. I feel like I cant contribute to anything.

[waveseer]

He is with you for a reason. Does he tell you what he likes/loves about you?

[winchester3]

Sounds to me like you've got a case of 'opposites attract'.

[jsx730]

I think the main problem here is your depression. You need to seek treatment so you can spend less time doubting yourself and more time making the best of your future and relationship.

 

When you are aware of things like this:

 

I keep him awake with my crying when he is on call and needs sleep

 

I beg for comfort from him(e.g hugs) at the most inapropriate time.

 

I don't bother with sex.

 

but don't take action to fix them, that is a sign that there is something wrong. Go talk to your doctor about it, and maybe you can find a way to fix it.

[Hanz33]

I think the main problem here is your depression. You need to seek treatment so you can spend less time doubting yourself and more time making the best of your future and relationship.

 

When you are aware of things like this:

 

 

 

but don't take action to fix them, that is a sign that there is something wrong. Go talk to your doctor about it, and maybe you can find a way to fix it.

 

 

I guess...I hate doctors etc. They freak me out. I almost cry everytime i go to a doctor and my voice gets all crackily.. so embaressing.. i try an avoid it